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Reinventing Yourself in your 30s – Definitive Things for Men
I want to become the best version of myself.
My job has a free gym, I am making the most money I’ve ever made and can afford nice skincare products and clothes. I have decided I am going to become the best version of myself and reinvent myself now that I’m into my 30s now
What’s your list of the definitive things a man needs and should do in his 30s to look good and feel good?
I want to develop a good skincare routine beyond just a daily cleanser. I want to start exfoliating, moisturizing, using sunscreen, etc.
I want to get basics and staple items to mix and match into easy outfits that look great anywhere.
I want to get nice shoes, nice accessories, etc.
Discuss and post tips, inspo, advice, etc.
This is the video where it "clicked" for me and I made up my mind to be better. Tom Ford (the person) is actual inspirational as heck and I always want to change after hearing him talk
Literal Alpha M cringefest shit.
>tom ford
lost respect when I found out he’s unironically a gay
why would that matter? 99% of all male designers are gay
Fashion design is a gay man’s game
I’ve been doing this for the last few years, highly recommend. Only thing I don’t care for is skincare, mine is fine and I leave it completely alone.
Clothes:
>Grab some dark jeans (espresso brown, dark grey/etc), some plain color tshirts, some nice belts
>Some nice jackets (varsity if you feel like it suits you, or a bomber or other leather jacket. Suede if you feel confident
>Some button down shirts in plain colors with a few more interesting, patterened ones but no big logos or graphics
>Get some nice boots. Some slightly formalish ones and some more rugged ones.
>If it’s cold where you live, get a nice, long wool or cashmere overcoat
Then go find a good local tailor. Someone who really knows what they’re doing. Have almost everything you wear fitted, it’s like $10 per adjustment on some things (more on complex stuff). If you’re serious about working out then your shoulders will eventually go up in sizes and you’ll have to get everything fitted at the waist. Be prepared to replace your jackets within a couple years.
Appreciate the tips, anon
>Grab some dark jeans
I’m also gonna get a nice pair of light wash as I have noticed, especially in the menswear world, light wash is really popular for casual outfits
>I want to become the best version of myself.
Literally winced reading this
i bet you’re fat and ugly but still come here to shit on anyone that tries to be better
Stop projecting
>I want to do things that are commonly/traditionally associated with growing up
All the more power to you, but first off it’s worth thinking about the reason why you want to.
Is it because you like how you look wearing suits, or is it because you want others to think you look mature and grown up?
Is it because you feel your skin is uncomfortably oily/dry at the end of the day, or is it because spending hours on end on /fashion/ gave you the impression that EVERYONE in their right mind exfoliates, moisturizes, uses sunscreen etc. on the regular if they want to have half a chance of looking presentable?
It might turn out that you like some of the things associated with """maturity""" and not others, or it might turn out that you don’t feel too comfortable in joggers and sneakers but wearing a black suit with a shirt with double cuffs and oxfords makes you feel like a clown.
>list of definitive things a man should do to look and feel good
Dressing and acting in ways that make him feel comfortable with himself and the mirror rather than in ways that make him believe he’ll fit in more easily.
I believe it’s the same at any age.
get a dragon dildo then start gooning and posting pictures of yourself in transvestite drag on WAYWT every day
One of the rules I followed that helped me enormously was "Do what I know I should do". Every time I’d get an annoying email at work that I don’t want to reply to, part of me thinks "I should.." so I did. Same with going to the gym, if I’m able to and not too sore, I should so I do. Helped make me a more reliable and mature guy all around.
Also, do what you say you’ll do. If you don’t think you can, don’t say it. And talk more about what other people are doing when you’re speaking with them, become a better listener. When you talk about yourself, never talk about what you’re *going* to do, just about what you’ve done. Makes it much harder to get lost fantasizing about goals you’ll never hit. Makes it clear what you’ve actually acomplished and if it’s not much, that’ll push you to change that.
>t. he decided to become a gay
Congrats anon. I don’t get the Sean Connery reference, but good luck with your exfoliating and purses.
I don’t think you’re doing it correctly when you phrase it like
>What’s your list of the definitive things a man needs and should do in his 30s to look good and feel good?
The answer to that is too large, complex but mainly, individual
Dressing white collar, being clean shave and smelling good help in BUSINESS. It helps you look trustworthy, it’s not something EVERY man needs.
What are your goals? Are you trying to get ahead in your career, do you want to attract women, what do YOU want? Dress accordingly.
If however you just want to dress more mature, yeah clean your skin, wash your ass, update your wardrobe a bit to be reflective of how you want to be perceived.
IDEALLY you choose a goal – such as starting a company or getting promotions and become the type of person who has a successful company, etc in the process.
TLDR: Reinventing yourself is about becoming who you need to be – it’s not just larping with a dress shirt without cause. Want pussy? Learn game, smell good and be in shape. Want more money? Save money, take risks and hustle. Want more respect? Dress well, learn leadership skills and work towards promotions or job hop.
calisthenics is the path to an /fashion/ body into old age
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Proud of you OP
>stick with the basics
>get a navy blazer and a good pair of jeans
>work out
>eat well – cut down on sugar, alcohol, and red meat
>socialize and see friends often
>find a hobby and dive in to cultivate yourself
>avoid red meat
no
you can still eat chicken
when i hit 30 and my bad genes take what’s left of my hair, i’m going full count-olaf-core
just the most unrepentantly grimy heck in clothes that might have once been nice but certainly won’t be by the time i’m seen wearing them
I can sympathize with guys who want to be better in their 30s and I actually think that’s the perfect time to do a lot of things you maybe wish you did in your 20s (better than actually doing them in your 20s honestly) but I think reinvention is the completely wrong mindset. You are who you are. What you really want is to upgrade yourself, to be fitter, healthier, dress better, have more money. I think all of that is well and good but reinvention implies a different sort of person but that’s not even possible let alone what you want.
This. The formative years for personality are over, but physical and mental health can still be changed.
You misunderstand. There are no formative years. The whole lifespan is a never ending process of change, of the body, of the mind, of the spirit, of tastes, of temperament, of everything. The reason you don’t see a lot of change after young adulthood is a matter of choice, deliberate or incidental.
The single best thing you can do is be fit. So start an exercise program or join a sport. You want to be athletic, not jacked. Playing sports and being active>Weightlifting. Other than that, het your haircut, grooming, and hygiene down pat. For facial hair, clean shaven or stubble looks best on most men. Full beard or mustache can look alright. The sort of in-between stubble and full beard is the worst. Can’t help you with hairstyle since different styles look good on different men. If you’re losing your hair, start with ketoconazole (2%, prescription) and Dermapen. Get a drain trap so you can watch how much hair you’re losing. If that doesn’t cut it, consider adding Tretinoin (prescription), finasteride, and/or minoxidil in that order. Get a good skincare routine if you don’t have one. All you really need is moisturizer, sunscreen, and a cleanser to wash them off. You can look into Tretinoin for acne or anti-aging, but it’s not necessary and you’ve got to be careful. Consider contact lens or LASIK if you wear glasses. Teeth whitening, braces, if your teeth suck. You can look into MSE for jaw and face if you missed the mewing boat. If you have a thin neck, do some neck training to thicken it up and make it look more muscular. As for fashion, you mainly just want clothes that fit well and look somewhat more mature. That alone will set you apart from the crowd even if you don’t quite know what pieces you should go or what style you want. I guess just pick a style and buy pieces in that genre that fit well and are mature (no basketball sneakers). A watch can go a long way. A chain can look good in casual outfits.
>You want to be athletic, not jacked
why
Being too big looks stupid
Athletic is healthy and attractive while jacked is not. Jacked is at best strong but not healthy or attractive, and even that’s rare. Women aren’t attracted to jacked. They’re attracted to lean, supple, and athletic.
Why is being jacked unhealthy?
If you’re over 30 you can’t get jacked without taking shit that puts strain on your organs. You might LOOK good, but your heart isn’t what it was and you’ll face detrimental health effects. That’s why so many body builders die of heart failure or cardiac arrest despite looking good. You can push your limits in your 20s, but if you’re much older the best you can (and should) do is maintain what your genetics have given you.
>If you’re over 30 you can’t get jacked without taking shit that puts strain on your organs.
NTA, but you can’t "get jacked" at any age, if bodybuilders (professional or not) are your measuring stick. Literally everyone is on steroids. The "jacked" vs "lean" vs "athletic" distinctions are a meme. Just lift heavy and eat a lot (healthily). Unless you’ve insane genetics, you’re always going to look DYEL without roids
>Reinventing Yourself in your 30s
Here is a guy who reinvented himself at 40.
I’ve mixed feelings between cringe and being impressed.
Looked better before
That’s just a midlife crisis
is that Gianluca Vacchi?
Start by eating healthy, I don’t think chemical products are a substitute for a heathy diet.