Remember when you used to think the news was real? That was cute. Now we’re all just reverse-engineering what actually happened from a pile of contradictory headlines and tweets from guys with three dozen followers.
Journalists brought you WMDs in Iraq, years of Russiagate fever dreams, and hundreds of exposés on why hiking is racist. If you’ve ever seen a legacy news outlet correct a false story with a 2-word update buried under six ads, or watched them turn a nothingburger into a cultural firestorm, you know: this shirt isn’t exaggerating. It’s underreacting.
Because you don’t hate journalists enough. You think you do, but you don’t.
How it's made
The unisex tshirt blank for adults this tee is based on is a Gildan 64000. Made with ethically grown and harvested ring-spun US cotton, this is a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)) in a modern unisex cut. The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether formal or semi-formal.
Shoulders are reinforced with twill tape, there are no side seams for a smoother fit, and the ribbed-knit collar helps prevent curling. All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
Solid colors are 100% cotton, while heathers and sport grey use polyester blends for added durability. Note that due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear slightly off-white rather than bright white. 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC.
Machine wash instructions: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors, do not bleach. Tumble dry: low heat. Iron, steam or dry: low heat. Do not dryclean.
Size guide
| XS | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | 4XL | 5XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Width, in | 16.00 | 18.00 | 20.00 | 22.00 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 | 30.00 | 32.00 |
| Length, in | 27.00 | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 | 33.00 | 34.00 | 35.00 |
| Sleeve length, in | 7.99 | 8.23 | 8.50 | 8.74 | 9.02 | 9.25 | 9.49 | 9.72 | 9.96 |
| Size tolerance, in | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |















