You wake up in 225,000,000 BC. What's your next move anon?

You wake up in 225,000,000 BC.
What's your next move anon?

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Call the authorities

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Here's your "authorities" anon

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Based. I'd like to report a crime

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          *stares at you*

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >Kicks it since the velocoraptor was the size of an oversized chicken and the author hadnt done his research

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Do these look like oversized chickens? Also what

            [...]
            You wouldn't be getting velociraptors in this time period, those came in the late Cretaceous and are closer to us in the timeline then they were to the early Triassic by more than double the amount of time

            said, you're dealing with the uglies.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            frick forgot the link

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            David Attenborough may have the comfiest voice of all time, right up there with Bob Ross

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >Kicks it since the velocoraptor was the size of an oversized chicken and the author hadnt done his research

            You wouldn't be getting velociraptors in this time period, those came in the late Cretaceous and are closer to us in the timeline then they were to the early Triassic by more than double the amount of time

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Do you think those prehistoric animals would love a belly rub, Anon?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            [...]
            225000000 BC was during the Norian age of the late Triassic.You would be able to see some of the first dinosaurs but not Velociraptor.
            [...]
            There were some early mammals so maybe.

            It would probably be like trying to give a wild boar a belly rub

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            How fast could those critters move? Could you just bang them on the head with a big stick, make a fire by rubbing sticks together with some kindling and cook them up?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Archeological records show an average speed of 70 miles per hour

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >rabidosaurus
            it's probably over.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            You're lucky -- 200 million later and you'd be dealing with Rapetosaurus https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rapetosaurus

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            ah i didnt mean to sage, i think this thread has enjoyable discussion

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Are these even accurate? They have no reliable way of knowing the fat distribution.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >Kicks it since the velocoraptor was the size of an oversized chicken and the author hadnt done his research

            225000000 BC was during the Norian age of the late Triassic.You would be able to see some of the first dinosaurs but not Velociraptor.

            Do you think those prehistoric animals would love a belly rub, Anon?

            There were some early mammals so maybe.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >There were some early mammals so maybe.
            I unironically would love to pet one of these things. They look like dogs.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >The charges, officer?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Thanks god, I was being chased by drugs addicts, tranbirs and Black folk mr lezard, can you believe it?

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Kill myself

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      with what method

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        the scientific method

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I cover myself in dirt, mud and grasses. I crawl through the floor slowly, veeery slowly and without making noses. I keep crawling until I find a safe place in the bushes or in a cave. I build myself some weapons and kill a beast and eat it. I cover myself in animal grease to protect against from mosquitoes. If I wasn't eaten at this point I seal my basement with tree branches and stones to protect against predators. Here I hold out through the night.
    If I wasn't eaten I spend the day searching for stone and minerals. I build myself a shovel, hunt something and return to my basement. I build a bunch of pointy sticks to further fortify the outer parts of my cave. I start digging a hole into the basement. I spend the night inside the hole.
    And I keep gathering stuff and improving my basement for days, weeks, months, years, learning about the environment, about the animals and how to survive, but most importantly, my main concern is building a time machine to at some point return to the current era and pretend nothing happened.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Are you moronic, anon? You won't even be able to make something as common to us today as a plastic bottle.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        That kind of attitude is why he'll make it home and you will end up on display in some museum.

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    C

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >capture some Synapsids, Dinosaurs, Pterosaurs, etc.
    >build a zoo to contain them
    >breed them
    >wait for Time Police to arrest me for fricking up the timeline
    >kill them and steal their shit
    >use their time machine to go back to present
    >release these fellas into the wild
    >watch the environment get absolutely fricking from all the extinct diseases I brought to the Holocene
    >kek

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >capture
      Anon a toddler sized dino can bite your hand off before you can react

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        You can't prove that

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd probably be uncomfortable due to lower atmospheric oxygen.

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    To suffer from oxygen poisoning and then die.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      the carboniferous is over. oxygen concentration is lower than today, giving rise to bird-like lungs in dinosaurs incl. birds, in crocodiles etc. a lot of warm-blooded animal groups start around that time (mammals, dinosaurs, pterosaurs, crocodiles).
      ... yes, I know crocodiles are now cold-blooded but that's a secondary development, together with them being semi-aquatic today. their ancestors were most likely warm-blooded, as their lung structure hints, and they roamed the land, some on two long hind legs. today's crocodiles are but a sad remnant.

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Start wondering if the Synapsid carnivores can fricking smell me from smiles away in the desert

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Spread covid to all the dinosaurs.

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Frick a primitive synapsid right in the pussy (its fertile primeval DNA allows insemination) i use my dimetrodon man army to raise pyramids and draw Nazca-esque dicks in the earth.
    Having produced nephilim, god will then unleash the historically attested worldwide flood, setting the stage for the bronze age to occur soon after.

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Rape a dino. Find a flirty little tart in her nest while her male is hunting and overpower her. Take her, grunting and squealing, pummeling her dripping lizard c**t in a faustian symphony of transcendent overcoming. Choke the b***h as I explode my ape seed inside her till she's a pathetic hot mess, gasping, collapsing on the filthy ground, quivering in ecstasy and exhaustion we would breed a race of dino-ape Atlanteans to dominate the world. While her male watches us breed this master-race he rubs his miniscule dino-dong against a tree as a single humiliating and exhilarating tear runs down his scaled face, bliss and shame in submitting to his ape master. My child hatches from her egg. I am complete.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      well that was inevitable

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Drink my own piss. Not out of any practical utility - more the social freedom.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Nothing is keeping you from drinking your piss now though.

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Spend five minutes before I realise that I'm actually in Triassic era Australia and not regular era Australia.

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Marvel at what dinosaurs actually look like. MFs probably look way different.

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    survive until nightfall and see a sky more dark and splendid than anything in this world, with familiar planets but unusual stars

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      That and breath the the air.I would also die content knowing that the bacteria and viruses in my body have a 225 million year evolutionary advantage and would surely kill what killed me.

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd cough and sneeze on every animal and see what happens.

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Bang hot cavewomen

  18. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >What's your next move anon?

    Probably slowly die of malnutrition over the span of a year because not enough flora has evolved yet that resembles a modern human diet.

    Fruit, cereals, and most nuts (pine nuts might be around) simply won't be invented until the late cretaceous and I'm not confident in my ability to be sustained on nothing but bracken sprouts, giant insects, synapsid meat, and seafood.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      It's all protein isn't it? You'd sooner die of some vitamin deficiency than starvation.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        He never said die of starvation. He said die of malnutrition

  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Holy fricking shit Asia used to be underwater

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I can't breathe

  21. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I wouldn't say a single word to the lystrosaurii; I would listen to what they had to say, and that's what no one did

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >I CAN'T BREED!
      no point in complicating it when that's what they all say

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      you bastard

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd touch grass.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      grass doesnt exist yet

  23. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >15% oxygen in the atmosphere
    kaputt.

  24. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Probably get eaten by the nearest predatory dinosaur, and give it diarrhea because I'm poisonous to it or some shit.

  25. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Drag myself along the riverbank with my front limbs while roaring loudly and occasionally catching fish with my mouth.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      when in pangaea, do as the pangaeans do

  26. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    If I carved the word "Black person" on a rock, what would be the best place to hide it in order to ensure that future paleontologists would find it? I suppose one place would be England because they keep finding new fossils there every time

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      black people live rent-free in your mind. you're obsessed. cant even post in a completely unrelated thread without thinking about them.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        So?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Along the northeast coast of Hudson Bay, Canada apparently.

      https://www.nsf.gov/news/news_images.jsp?cntn_id=112299&org=NSF

  27. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Close my eyes and beg for Jesus and my mom until something eats me.

  28. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    go back to sleep

  29. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Make a fire and spears

  30. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    could i go to some cold place with not much life going on? was there some?

  31. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >Punch tree
    >Make a workbench
    >Start building flint/wood/stone tools as soon as I can
    >Form and pack dirt into an igloo shape
    >Put a wooden door on the front and light torches along the outside/inside
    Easy

  32. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Probably get lurked by some ancient bacteria in the drinking waterr

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Mruked*

  33. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Deploy tactical nukes in all directions

  34. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    run a marathon, tip to tip baby!

  35. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I just go to the nearest lost civilization settlement and calmly explain them what happened (they are psychic,obviously)

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