Why don't you invest in a Japanese toilet? It'll wash your asshole for you after you poop.
Did you know the average American uses over 110 rolls of toilet paper a year?
That's over 36 billion rolls of toilet paper used each year across America!
And despite this massive waste of resources, you don't even get a thorough cleaning of your anus by using a dry piece of paper.
The pressurized water will clean your asshole 8x better than toilet paper.
Think about it.
Buy a Japanese toilet.
Took a shit on one in Singapore. It had all kinds of sounds effects, water fountain, Parfum and heated seat.
It was way too comfy. Nobody should be that comfy when taking a shit. It will eventually turn you gay.
Honestly you people laugh at toilet paper hoarders, but you really dont have enough toilet paper yourselves. The average person uses 1 roll per day. If you have a family of 4, that's 28 rolls a week. Over 100 a month. TP rolls will be worth their weight in gold in a few months, because everyone needs it.
>one roll a day
Wtf you must really eat trash
newfags
>1 roll per day
only if you're 500lbs
well I nut at least 5-10 times a day, of course I use a lot of toilet paper dumb ass.
>The average person uses 1 roll per day
Anon... you are supposed to clean, not polish your ass!
I clean my ass hole to point of spotlessness, and I haven’t had a skid mark in years. My secret? At the end of wiping I will tear off sections and out my paper directly onto my asshole, i then release my anus and hold the paper on the hole while applying positive pressure and doing small, slow, circular motions. I do this until there’s not a speck of shit left anywhere even near my turd cutter.
empty corn cob on a power drill
just throwing this out there
>the poll-ack, master of loo
Okay.
>Kyrgyztan
at least we have loos, poo brother
Yeah, a big quantity of loos to clean at krauts clay, yeah.
What is yours favourite loo cleaner?
Kyrgyz head works amazingly good.
>le funny kraut and slav divided polack
Truly a master of loo.
you're not really that funny, if at all. I would believe you're a kraut. Or just dumb.
>polack says i am a kraut
Hoil Looltler! Cease your retardation!
dumbass
>a hoil loolter is angry
Ooh, did you miss some shit particles, janny?
>At the end of wiping I will tear off sections and out my paper directly onto my asshole
No anon, you should not masturbate your ass with the excuse that you are cleaning it.
Clean up your diet, then when you poop, all of it will come out. Add lots of fiber and water to your diet and remove the crap that fucks up your intestine flora.
>1pbtid
>average person uses 1 roll per day.
You come back nao.
I have questions.
I love covid memes
>The average person uses 1 roll per day
>written by amerimutt
What a fuck? I use 1 roll per week! How much you shart everyday, retard?
I'm paranoid about microscopic shit particles being accelerated through the air by uncontrollable water pressure shooting in different directions, this is why I also close the toilet lid before flushing.
Now imagine how many poo particles are on the average persons toothbrush, because for some reason 99% of people don't have a toothbrush cover/case
The most disgusting people are the ones who leave their toothbrushes hanging over the edge of the sink or sitting in a collective cup touching other brushes. These are the same people who wear masks religiously and slather their hands in sanitizer.
>Americans have their toilet in the same room with their bathtub and toothbrush
That is student dormitory tier in this country and most people find the idea horrifying
how much do you spend on wipes in a year? Do you have a septic tank or a city sewer? Even flushable wipes don’t actually biodegrade and will clog your septic system.
a shower toilet seat can be as little as $100, but you will have to do the installation yourself. USA code might require a GFCI to prevent your asshole from being arc welded shut by high quality Hispanic wiring.
They cost like 15-20k USD
a premium bidet (toilet seat only, but with toilet seat heater, UV light, night light, etc) like a xaomi one costs you ~$200. You can get non-premium bidet for like $40
Even japanese brands are typically less than $300 USD for retrofit.
https://s.kakaku.com/housing/toilet-seat/
I am almost morbidly obese and resisted the pootie hoser for years, with a perpetual feeling of anusial uncleanliness due to being both highly physically active and a repulsive fatbody
a few years ago I tried the anal agitator and the difference was astounding
I feel that my underpants get cleaner the more days in a row I wear them.
I cannot live without my lavage loo.
on the other hand I refuse to use a public toilet one because I have heard, I have HEARD mfers in other stalls running the water and shitting at the same time. They are blasting the poo out of midair. They are water jet cutting logs out of their ass. I will only use my own personal rectum rinser.
It’s about $150-300 for a basic Toto washer. The addition of an outlet in your bathroom is probably more expensive. Then about $50-100 for the plumbing installation unless you DIY.
I installed one once as a retrofit and it was trivially simple, I think it was just unscrewing the supply hose and adding a pass-through T junction that was included with the unit. It will of course be harder if the local plumbing standard doesn’t match the supplied parts.
And of course, if you don’t have a grounded outlet, it’s going to be difficult.
>why don't you spray droplets of poop water from another person on your asshole? Just get poop water on your balls, my friend.
i put it on the ensuite. only me and missus use it, and we already go near each others nether regions all the time
that's understandable, but japs pride themselves in those things being standard in public toilets
Yes, I would like to have a Japanese toilet please
>poop buttons used by strangers
I bought a bidet at Walmart last week, first time I ever used one. How do you pat your ass dry while only using a small amount of TP?
Clean your ass thoroughly, hang a cloth towel there for after bidet use only. If you use the bidet properly, there should be no streaks
So you have dirty shit towels hanging up all over your restroom?
There's a few different methods, you can also have a basket full of clean cloths and a basket for the used. Again, if you use a bidet properly this is no shit left. You can even use soap if you want. I bet you dry your ass with the same towel you dry your face with, but this is what disgusts you
But now my asshole is wet and has shit particles?
>shit particles
To collider!
you can get a bidet attachment for your existing toilet.
when i move out, i plan on getting one. cant have nice things with the retards i live with now.
My parents are retarded as well
my siblings would break it within a week.
why yes, I will have some champagne
>high pressure water valve at your sensitive asshole
>the shit-flecks get blasted off of your anus and dot the surrounding toilet surface area
>some of it gets on the nozzle, which retracts into its hidey-hole
>e. coli and fag disease festers on the nozzle
>next time you are 'washed' by this infernal contraption you are literally sprayed with pozzed fag water
no thanks. no wonder asian "men" are so fucking gay
kys hans. the premium ones have a UV light for killing germs on the nozzle. plus the nozzle cleans itself every time you sit down
At least we can all appreciate your clean ass anon.
What's a toil-et?
We already are bidet masterrace.
First you clean most of it with paper, then you wash it with soap and water in the bidet.
Max hygiene.
>110 rolls a year
When I'm alone I might use one or maybe two paper rolls per month but whenever I live with a cunt-having person I have to buy a twelve-pack every week. What the hell are they doing with so much toilet paper
They cover the toilet seat, they roll up giant wads around their hand, and they pat their vagina dry thoroughly.
Use your shower head
In the U.S outlets next to the toilet are super rare. You'll usually only find them next to the sink. So on top of paying for the toilet I would also have to pay to install a new outlet. In the end I'd be spending hundreds or thousands just to get my ass and balls blasted by poop water. Nah, I'd rather just get in the shower
already did. can confirm it cleans way better than toilet paper, and is more economical
t. not a chink
Stop watching South Park.
a pack of flushable wet wipes is like $2 at the dollar store. they changed my life, my asshole feels sparklingly clean all day long.
this
I use tp and then a wet wipe, if my poop was smeary. Foolproof. Just don't flush the wetwipes in the toilet though or you'll make some Pollack's day very unpleasant.
not flushing them is gross lol, get a better toilet man thats fucking disgusting
if you use tp first and use the wipes only as final touch, it doesn't matter . Then you just throw them into a garbage can with a foil bag in. It doesn't even smell, lol
wtf jackass
touching your shit covered ass is disgusting. wash it with a bidet instead
What a fag you must be. Go out in the front yard and drag your arse over the grass till its clean like a normal person.
Why did you say poop and not shit? Never say poop ever again fucking idiot.
Yes, yes, we all watched "South Park" last week.
I've never seen South Park is it good?
Joe bidet
I wipe then wash my arsehole in the sink afterwards as well.
So now you have a wet ass, what next?
hi Randy
I used to think that South Park was funny, and then got gayer over the years. But after going back and rewatching almost all the seasons, turns out it’s always been pretty gay. I was just too dumb to notice the programing and propaganda before.
Fuck you South Park.
Lol this pathetic sprinkle can't do a decent job
Luckly indians and africans offset the average global consumption of toalet paper so its not so bad
because we have too much limestone in our water.
Why not then make some limestonenade, if life gives you limestone?
My toilet is literally 30cm away from the shower. I can just hang my ass over bathtub and rinse it all I want.
>sprink water and shit all over your ass
That sounds disgusting, I use a bidet and water and soap like a civilized human being who does not want to get anal cancer later down the road
Americans are finally waking up to the superiority of bidets.
i got bigger problems in my life than being able to drop money on an expensive toilet. plus man wipes > toilet paper anyways
I'm using transdimensional ass cleaner inside ufo.
the pipes that come with the $40 amazon ones leak constantly and are garbage, and expect you to have a old toilet with the tank outlet on the underside in a visible location
the included t junction with those units is too weak to handle full mains pressure, so if you install it onto the wall instead of the basin it leaks everywhere
in Japan there is a saying:
Buy Japanese or you are giving your money to a chinaman.
I am not certain how many people say it, it might be just me
What Japanese products are there to buy? I can only afford a Toyota from the year 2000, even Japanese rice cookers are crazy expensive
the yen has been extremely low for the past year. Is Australian money worth anything anymore? If you had American dollars you would be able to buy a rice cooker so big it could feed an American.
>Did you know the average American uses over 110 rolls of toilet paper a year?
>That's over 36 billion rolls of toilet paper used each year across America!
who fucking cares
I clean my asshole in the shower after i shit and wipe
>Mexico
it must be convenient to have such an all-in-one bathroom fixture
I just took a shit and am using one right now
two rolls of paper a week!? what the fuck is wrong with people.
Probably it helps to prevent hemorrhoids. Burgers are fatass. So they must have hemorrhoids. Even if you have hemorrhoids, almost no pain when you clean ur ass: me confirmed
I've been on the same roll of toilet paper since december mostly because I follow the golden shit shave shower rule