Why did dysphoria only hit me in my 20s

I've spent most of my life being glad I was born female because it is convenient. I get to cry, I have more clothing options in conservative circles, and people expect less of me. Also girls are pretty and I was just not interested in boys in any way shape or form until a few years ago

But like two years ago I started thinking "what if" and I can't frickin stop. It's taken the blinders off to my delusional view of myself as someone androgynous who just was seen as a woman due to my long hair, and now I know I'm so fricking feminine. I've got little body hair, a chubby face, big hips, a high voice, literally no dick obviously and am short as frick it's ridiculous.

But I've only felt this way for the last year or two? I'm on testosterone and not getting off it because it makes my emotions feel more stable and I'm tired of looking like a woman, but if this came on so suddenly, is it going to go away suddenly too? Am I gonna detrans? I could repress for longer just in case, but I could also drink a pint of whiskey and rip my fingernails out

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    This is just for pic you posted but if they’re so mad about fertility they should advocate for getting eggs and speak frozen. I realize that isn’t going to happen because they’re all religious freaks but goddamn

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      she doesnt care about trans women at all the book is only about adolescent afabs. youre not even responding to an argument she makes in the book

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I know it’s about trans guys, I’m just thinking in general. I know it has some weird creepy shit like “our white wombs are being destroyed” and that she’s a lunatic, but the issue they’re pretending to care about is fertility and the birth rate, I’m just generalizing it to all trans people

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          > our white wombs are being destroyed
          this is not in the book. its an easy read you should read it anon 🙂

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            I’m completely illiterate and reading it wouldn’t change my mind on anything anyways because I already know I want to have kids via a surrogate

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >freezing eggs and sperm
      >and sperm
      I doubt TERFs care about that.

      In fact if anything they'd want the Nordic model of banning transition without sterilization and destroying any frozen sperm.

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Offtopic but why are women named "abigail" always batshit crazy?

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    maybe controversial but I think dysphoria is natural, you always think the grass is greener on the other side, just keep it as a fetish and remain a feminine male nothing wrong with that

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      OP is AFAB moron

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Honestly sounds good to me

      I think that depends on why you don't want to be "seen as a woman". Is it because of misogyny and you don't identify with society's ideas of "woman"; or because you identify with and want to be seen as a man?

      I don't think I'd identify with society's ideas of either? Like women come in all different shapes and sizes, and the area I live in doesn't make too much a difference in how they treat people. But women are called "women" and "she/her" and I don't like that mess

      Were you sexually assaulted two years ago?

      ... three years ago. Not a bad question. Being amab wouldn't have protected me though

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I don't think T is a good idea if you don't want to live as a man

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Oh if that's what you meant then I misinterpreted. Yeah I want to live as a man. I just don't "feel" like anything gender wise

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >... three years ago. Not a bad question. Being amab wouldn't have protected me though
        future detrans detected

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Aw well, at least if I detrans I'll get to have a deep voice and more body hair

          i'm AMAB and feel similarly. in my mid 20s i rapidly developed a desire to be a woman which isn't fully materialized.
          i think about it all the time but the only thing that's keeping me anchored to masculinity is that i still get off using my dick. even that though i think that every other aspect of being a man besides that i have no attachment to. i'd rather be a literal fricking dickgirl than a man

          Glad I'm not the only one. If you figure out the answer lmk

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >... three years ago. Not a bad question. Being amab wouldn't have protected me though

        There it is. You were traumatized

  4. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I think that depends on why you don't want to be "seen as a woman". Is it because of misogyny and you don't identify with society's ideas of "woman"; or because you identify with and want to be seen as a man?

  5. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Were you sexually assaulted two years ago?

  6. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    well gender isn't even real so..

  7. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >Makes them infertile

  8. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >being glad I was born female because it is convenient
    Convenient how?

  9. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >it is convenient. I get to cry, I have more clothing options in conservative circles, and people expect less of me
    i love that this larping incel couldn’t even make it 2 sentences without giving away the game lol

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      It would've been so easy to fake it too. Every AFAB detransitioner meme is about how they hated womanhood because sexism or whatever, why not just copy that?

  10. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    i'm AMAB and feel similarly. in my mid 20s i rapidly developed a desire to be a woman which isn't fully materialized.
    i think about it all the time but the only thing that's keeping me anchored to masculinity is that i still get off using my dick. even that though i think that every other aspect of being a man besides that i have no attachment to. i'd rather be a literal fricking dickgirl than a man

  11. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I empathize with you, anon. I've always felt dysphoric since around age 12, but a lot of the people around me in my conservative state try to get me to accept my womanhood by saying being one is easier; you can be more emotionally vulnerable, you're expected to do less work, etc.

    I think you may have just been extremely repressed by the culture around you. There's nothing wrong with that, and I'm happy you're learning new things about yourself. The brain doesn't finish developing until your mid to late 20's, so discovering you're trans in your 20's after a fairly normal adolescence isn't out of the question nor does it invalidate your recent self discovery.

    Godspeed man. Hope you figure this out soon.

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