LULZ / TV & Film

This book needs a HBO adaptation.

  1. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    No more dino movies/tv for at least two decades

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      How can you hate dinokino?
      Just don’t try and make another Jurassic sequel

  2. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    i hate dino movies. do something original for once. like samurai dinos or some shit.

  3. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    >Hammond was a downright evil greedy prick who hated his grandchildren and cursed them even as he was eaten by a pack of Compys
    Honestly forgot about some of the weird differences in this book. Michael Crichton’s early stuff is good, then you can get into his schizo kino with books like Next and the one where the world government controls the weather or whatever

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      >hammond died cursing his grandkids
      bullshit lmao

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        Anon I was reading Crichton when you were sucking your mom’s fat titties inbetween pearl necklaces and titjobs you little puke, literally just google search it retard

        • 1 week ago
          Anonymous

          lol

          >hammond died cursing his grandkids
          bullshit lmao

          Nah it’s true. He goes for a walk once everybody is safe in the compound again and then the kids play a T Rex roar over the PA system and he gets scared and falls down a hill, breaks his ankle and gets eaten by compies.

          • 1 week ago
            Anonymous

            those little shits had it out for him

        • 1 week ago
          Anonymous

          >you were sucking your mom’s fat titties inbetween pearl necklaces and titjobs you little puke

          my god what a hot sentence

        • 1 week ago
          Anonymous

          You read it yesterday?

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      Not necessarily the case. He’s just an aloof corporate schmuck who has no idea how fucked his vision of success is. The movies just made him have a really whimsical and childish sense of wonder, which softened the blow of his wrongdoing.

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      >Hammond cloned an elephant the size of a rat, but the thing was a literal zombie that was losing his skin, bleeding everywhere and constantly in agonizing rage at its own existence

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        I think it was an elephant calf given a bunch of growth hormone suppressors

  4. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    >HBO
    Would it even be possible to get the rights? Of course Universal has all the movies copyrighted but how much of Crichton's work is available?

  5. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    I'd love to see a true to the book horror movie. The ending where they're trapped inside by the raptors is scary as fuck.

  6. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Even with book Lex being an extremely annoying & nasty brat?

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      I think that's one deviation nobody would complain about

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        I liked Lex in the movie, but I & everyone else would have HATED her if she was fully book accurate. Michael Crichton, if you're reading this from Heaven, I love ya, dude, BUT WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        Keep her annoying, but just kill her ass during the rex sequence and make it real gorey too.

        • 1 week ago
          Anonymous

          What is the alleged subtle socialism?

          • 1 week ago
            Anonymous

            I tried to watch that homosexual's video but it was all incoherent copy pasted nonsense. The "subtle socialism" is by what I could glean any allusion to anti-corporatism in the film. But then the video ends with random anti-communist talking points.

            I would like this. Honestly, it bothers me how kids are immune in the Jurassic movies. Camp Cretaceous should have started with a wider cast of kids who are systematically eaten every other episode, like in the Walking Dead.

            Yeah, that'd be real neat. It'd also be based if the dinosaurs themselves got abused since in the movies they're these gay angelic figures that never get substantially harmed. Like there should be scenes of baby triceratops getting strapped with C4 and let back into their heards only to set it off, or have a T.rex/Brontosaurus rampage through a city or something unti it's show down like Tyke the elephant and starts convulsing in on itself, or have people cutting off the sickle claws of raptors and wearing them as a necklace ala David Brown. Idk, man, seems like a whole untapped world of potential that people are too wimpy to explore.

            Though if we're being honest most of it has to do both with hollywood autism of "omg JP is doing dinosaurs therefore they should be left alone" and people struggling to find original ways to justify the existence of dinosaurs in the present without going full B-movie.

            • 1 week ago
              Anonymous

              >Like there should be scenes of baby triceratops getting strapped with C4 and let back into their heards only to set it off
              I don't any of this is in the original book my bro

              • 1 week ago
                Anonymous

                I swear, a lot of the "not living up to the original" these people talk about with the movies is just violence.

              • 1 week ago
                Anonymous

                What?
                Of course the original novel had way less whimsy than the movie but I don't get what you're talking about.
                I'd also prefer to look at the implications of the whole thing rather than just strap bombs to baby dinosaurs. Like, the book states that they don't know what dinosaur they've got DNA of until they grow it, but that means they have to wait for it to grow up and then fucking kill it to compare its bones to the fossil record. There are also tons of fetuses in jars in JPIII and shit.

              • 1 week ago
                Anonymous

                Ok, I take it back
                Hatching randomized dinosaurs does sound a bit cool. I also wonder how the tech improved so much between Jurassic Park and World, what even were those ball things?

              • 1 week ago
                Anonymous

                >I don't any of this is in the original book my bro
                Yeah, there's a scene where Alan Grant smashes Lex's head in while screaming "it's gig'n time!" because she was asking stupid question. DUMBASS!

                I swear, a lot of the "not living up to the original" these people talk about with the movies is just violence.

                Wtf are you on about? Those suggestions aren't even related to the novel. It has nothing to do with "living up to the original" and has everything to do with being based.

        • 1 week ago
          Anonymous

          I would like this. Honestly, it bothers me how kids are immune in the Jurassic movies. Camp Cretaceous should have started with a wider cast of kids who are systematically eaten every other episode, like in the Walking Dead.

          • 1 week ago
            Anonymous

            does camp Cretaceous get any good later? I tried watching it but the videogame thing from the first episode was so cringy I dropped instantly

            • 1 week ago
              Anonymous

              Isn't camp cretaceous made for children or something
              Last image I saw of it, it didn't appear to have a good art style, maybe my mind is exaggerating it though.

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      If you dislike it you’re sexist

  7. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Actually, I agree with you. I’d like to see a different take on this franchise that isn’t Spielbergian. That’s obviously what lead us to Jurassic Workd. Something a bit more mature that is closer to the book would be great. Also the book is horribly fucking paced for movie format so a long form TV series could work

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      A tv show would have awful pacing dude. Half the episodes would just end with Grant and the kids walking into the distance.

  8. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    >tfw we'll never get an R-rated dinosaur horror kino because of how expensive dinosaurs are to animate

  9. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Couldn’t agree more, brutal adult audience Dino horror please

  10. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    >modern HBO

    What if Dr Grant was a BLACK WOMAN!?!?!?

  11. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Where my LULZ bros at

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      >No Sphere
      >No Timeline

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      Based, I have this one.

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        rip the binding

  12. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    A dino horror would be kino. Like Dino Crisis or something.

  13. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    If they're going to do it, they need to do it before Wayne Knight passes because I won't accept another actor as Nedry

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      Just deep fake his OG scenes into the new movie.
      Including the donut picture.

  14. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    I liked picrel when Malcolm (Crichton) was ranting about how social media will be the death of mankind and this was like back in the 90s lmao

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      He says everything will grind to a halt and freeze. I bet even he didn't see things essentially regressing and taking the crazy random turns it did to head in the current direction

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      Oy vey anon. Cool it with the antisemitic passages.

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      I used this speech verbatim for an oral presentation on social media and got top marks. Thanks Mike Crike.

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        >People too stupid to recognize kino plagiarism
        Where did you give this speech where not 1 person could recognize the origins of it?

        • 1 week ago
          Anonymous

          Year 12 English in rural Australia

          • 1 week ago
            Anonymous

            Savages

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      another crichton book that was made into a movie back in the 90s

  15. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    DINO FURRY PLEAZE

  16. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    I just hope picrel is in any future movie they make
    She is the best character

  17. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    As long as they do justice to all the math stuff and the day to day operations of the park

  18. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Only if it's got all the R rated gore and babies being eaten alive by compys. And also Allen blowing up a raptor nest.

  19. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    After what they did to Westworld?

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