LULZ / Misc

RUSSIA IS NOT MORD-

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Last_Ringbearer
>The Last Ringbearer is a 1999 book by Russian author Kirill Eskov. The basic premise of the book is that Tolkien's LotR story is potentially a historical revisionist propaganda by the "winners of the war" and is therefore unreliable and incomplete. This book attempts to tell an alternative version of the story: Mordor is a peaceful constitutional monarchy that has worked hard for industrialization. But the elves felt threatened by an increasingly powerful Mordor (thanks to industrialization).

  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >The Lord of the Rings saga is a gripping tale of teamwork, magic, and the triumph of good over evil against all odds… if you’re degenerate, decadent capitalist swine. The problem with the Lord of the Rings, in Russia’s view, is that history is written by the victors, Mordor might have been misunderstood, and it could have prospered if it weren’t for the external meddling of men, elves, and dwarves.
    >In 1999, Russian author Kirill Eskov penned, The Last Ringbearer, a version of the Lord of the Rings written from the view of Sauron’s forces. This alternative view of the saga features a lot of common historical ideas from the real Earth’s 20th Century applied to the fictional universe created by Tolkien, a departure from the Hobbit propaganda the Deep State (aka dwarves) would have you believe.

    >Eskov writes his novel under the premise that history is written by the victors, and a novel written by the vanquished would present an entirely different view of Tolkien’s creation. The Last Ringbearer is meant to counter Hobbit Propaganda that wants you to think that Gandalf and elves are anything but thieves and war criminals.

    >While readers of the Lord of the Rings were led to believe Mordor is an evil place, desolate and dedicated to the destruction of the world of men, The Last Ringbearer wants you to know the glorious world of Mordor was filled with engineers and artisans on the brink of a new industrial revolution, whose beauty was cut down in its prime by the imperialist pigs led by the Elves allied with the Elvish puppet Aragorn.

    >After the forces of Middle Earth slaughter orc civilians during an invasion of the land of Mordor, two orcs fleeing the elvish onslaught rescue a Gondorian noble who was sentenced to die for opposing the massacres of civilians. Together, they work to free the land of men from Elvish magic.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >orc civilians
      That isn't canon, right?

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Technically it is. Not all orcs were soldiers, many were simply slaves (in fact their race began as elves who were enslaved by the original enslaver, Morgoth)

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Orcs were made for every aspect of war, that includes soldiers and workers for the foundries and blacksmiths. Food production and such used slaves from other races (mainly men).
          So yes all orcs served one purpose and that was war.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >The Dwarfs are the Deep State.

      This is pure unadulterated Russian gold.

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >The Last Ringbearer actually accuses Gandalf of “crafting the Final Solution to the Mordorian problem.
    BASED??

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >"A wizard is never guilty of war crimes, Frodo Baggins. "

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Was listening to Russian heavy metal compilation in YouTube.
    Lots of cool songs and references to some guy called Feanor.
    Look him up. Turns out he's from Lord of the Rings.
    Well damn. Guess i gotta read the books then. Maybe then i can appreciate the movies too.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Móviles are a shit,book i read it as teen its good. You will know Tom Bobmbabdil or sth as this,dosent appear at the films.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Of course Russians would read a fictional book and interpret western propaganda from it

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      decades of reading through your inane bullshit sharpens one's eyes and wits

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        schizophrenia

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Implying they are wrong

      Propaganda get money, there is a reason why Disney and Netflix get money and why unknown things to you not.

      >Communist swing

      I hate communism and if you werent a kid you would already noticed that communism is a weapon, ideologíes are just poison.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Interpretation game is half of the fun of the reading

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Author was english catholic, wasnt exactly the classic anglo. Also when it was wrote Russia wasnt industrializating.
        For my point of view:
        Hobbits: English. Because Tolkien told so,otherwise i wouldnt have known. Wasnt when he wrote the same time about Dawrin's theory? That influenced some books as the time machines and the morlocks.
        So whatever, hobbits= english.
        And then my opinion:
        Gondor and Rohirim: Old empires Who used to live in proper great empires. Still are strong,but are a shadow or their previous power and influence,so Gondor= west roman empire. Rohirim: Byzantium+probably tge stuff of being good Riders being an influenced from polish? Whatever,he calls them humans. After all what is the standard of human to an english,but not being from UK? So a "continental".

        Elves: Atlantis. Have been en Earth since centuries ago. Tolkien as catholic i beat was aware of platonism and many of the greek paganism that was accepted as Christian doctrine because saying the same as Christ. Not all greek paganism,but some of It. So he knew about Atlantis tales. In his book,instead of dying because a flood,its them that decide ti leave Earth,its like they become tired of humans and say: its your problem now . So they dont try to help humans and many escape to X , i dont remember the name, a place where only elves can ARRIVE,no humans,ni dwarfs not anything but elves. Semi elfs remind of Titans,those semi human and semi God,mentiones in OT as gegants.

        Men of the sand: Thats an easy one. They are clearly arabs. He say they are humans,but tejy choose to align with Mordor because Mordor gave them money or promises of land,i dont remember. There Mordor acts as Hell,and arabs being humans lied by Satan and followig so a satanic religion,so siding with Mordor. They wear arab desert clothes and some of them have elephants,referencie to Cartago .

        Dwarfs: Thats a difficult one. They like too much gold. We all know what that can mean,garden gnomes. But at the same time(1/2)

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          *Dwarfs(cont): But dwarfs also enjoy hard work,that sounds teutón,AND are very good artisans,that sounds as Reinaissence Italy? Also good fighters. So its like if he took a mix of different people to make dwarfs? Im not sure.

          Orcs: Demmons. Book is both influenced by both helenism and the Bible,catholics one so with the books that dosent appear in prot Bibles. And linked straigtht to the Roman empire and greek phylosophy,as catholics, so thats why he admires Gondor. Oh and creatures such as ents ,this is old folklore,like fairies,idk if english or irish

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Dwarfs: Thats a difficult one. They like too much gold. We all know what that can mean,garden gnomes. But at the same time
          Tolkien said they were based on garden gnomes.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Oh i didnt know that. Yeah the greedy thing and them like being good guys BUT that can lose their control over money because too greedy,its so obvious. As painted as good warriors,i wouldnt hace said. Maybe Tolkien was aware they were good warriors in the past. Whats about that liking mountains that much,like an extra he added? I dont see that gnomish. But its good to know Tolkien said they were garden gnomes, thanks

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Honestly pretty mediocre fanfic but deserves respect for sheer autism, i guess.
    I prefer to root for unredeemable chaotic evil villians, but Mordor there was reeeaaaaly whitewashed, so it was kinda boring to read.
    The book would be thousand times better if Mordor was protrayed like Sith Empire in EU or Drows in FR.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Drows in FR
      thats my fetish

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        based and lloth-pilled

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Two cringe books I don't give a shit about

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    pic related

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Bruh, that's my favorite Lord of the rings character.
      I love the part where he teaches frodo to use the force

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    the premise of the book is to look at it from the bad guys side and change the story up to make that viable. the sheriff of nottingham did the same thing and probably inspired the last ringbearer.

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    After the Rohans, garden gnomes, and Elves took over Mordor, the historical truth is gone

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      preach brother

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Russia is not Mordor. Russia is Helghan.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Russian is Rhovanion in Tolkien.
      They were ruled by princes. who were numenor descedent, and their kingdom has fallen to mordor prior the books, the survivors fled to dale and build the city on the river there which smaug burnt. It also has varyags and beorings-vikings. I dunno how could somebody project the events of 20 century over it, since Tolkien was not even hiding his inspirations.

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    FUCK ELVES

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Elves are basically Aryans. Dwarves the race Tolkien wrote as short bearded men with an origin separate from the other free peoples. A race in exile from their ancient home, stereotyped as greedy, known to be cunning. With a made up language sounding suspicious like a clone of Hebrew.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        And Hobbits are Anglos.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Spot on. Specifically, "just folks" country anglos.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Hobbits are Hong Kong n-words

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Aлo

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >some homosexual author wrote a book to address another book. For some reason 8n both books (((one side))) is not represented
    Very interesting, now get back to r3ddit.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There are dwarves in both though

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >talented craftsmen and vicious fighters with enormous strength who don't give a fuck about anything and openly tell everyone to BTFO are representing garden gnomes
        Yeah, right

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >vicious fighters with enormous strength
          look at him, he fell for elven propaganda

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Anon, pretending they don't represent garden gnomes is sticking your head in the sand. Their language sounds just like Hebrew. They're short bearded secretive greedy exiles. Tolkien is all but smacking the reader in the face with it. Have you even read the books?

          Yes Tolkien also made them superhuman like the Elves... but not AS superhuman.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Lol, open any movie and you will see how their characters are pictured by directors from gnomish Pedowood including their behavior during battles. On the other hand we have your opinion built on top of the fact that they wear white people's beards and look like short vikings, lol. Maybe vikings were also gnomish?

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              The dwarves do look like little vikings in Jackson's movies, yes. And in fact the names (like Gimli) come from Norse mythology. BUT those are the Dwarves "mannish names" and not their true secret names which are in their language which you'd know if you read the books sound like fucking hebrew.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I read the books, but IMO your arguments are just your interpretation which is far away from mainstream and doesn't have solid ground behind it. Language is not an argument (BTW, Hebrew is not very unique when it comes to the way it sounds) if culture is completely different.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >just your interpretation which is far away from mainstream and doesn't have solid ground behind it
                I've already gone over the fact that tolkien's dwarves are small bearded men, known to be secretive and greedy, known to have origin separate from other free peoples, exiled from their ancient home... with a language very similar to hebrew

                now here is a quote directly from jrr tolkien himself:
                >""The dwarves of course are quite obviously, wouldn't you say that in many ways they remind you of the garden gnomes? Their words are Semitic, obviously, constructed to be Semitic.""

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >known to be secretive and greedy
                Matches many nations and social groups

                >known to have origin separate from other free peoples, exiled from their ancient home
                Anon, you are misinformed about both dwarves and Ashkenazi garden gnomes.

                The answer to everything you have said is simple: ask anyone to describe stereotypical garden gnome lifestyle, then ask anyone to describe stereotypical dwarf lifestyle. Your point of view is built on top of the similarity you see and ambiguous interviews.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >ignoring the quote directly from JRR Tolkien confirming dwarves are garden gnomes
                Anon, I can lead you to the water but I cannot force you to drink it

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Mordor
                >DINDU NUFFINS

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >just your interpretation which is far away from mainstream and doesn't have solid ground behind it
                I've already gone over the fact that tolkien's dwarves are small bearded men, known to be secretive and greedy, known to have origin separate from other free peoples, exiled from their ancient home... with a language very similar to hebrew

                now here is a quote directly from jrr tolkien himself:
                >""The dwarves of course are quite obviously, wouldn't you say that in many ways they remind you of the garden gnomes? Their words are Semitic, obviously, constructed to be Semitic.""

                Opinion discarded

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >you must be a JOO
                kek. ok. it's fiction written almost 100 years ago you can ignore the author's words, only nerds like me will care.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Joo
                >posting JOO unironically

                KEK, fuck you garden gnome. Burn in hell.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I would show you my big uncut goy cock, but it's still from what your mom did to me

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            garden gnomes are weak gremlins, not stout dwarfs

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I didn't write the book Anon. Take it up with Tolkien on the spirit plane I guess

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              According to Tolkien they are. You may not have respect garden gnomes, but Tolkien had. It was his opinion.

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How can you take a fucking Tolkien stories and not identified yourself with any good group but a fucking Mordor and make propaganda how good Mordor really is
    TOP FUCKING KEK, they don't even hide they're force of evil, fucking why
    this is bad optics you stupid slav n-words Jesus Christ how stupid you are Putin?
    He could compare Sauron and Mordor to USA and Saruman of all colors to lgbt
    but nope, that stupid homosexual is more willing to say "stupid feral, bloodthirsty orks good, peaceful humans bad"

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      come on now anon, banan man did not personally pen this 1999 autism fest

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        sure, he ordered stupid slavs to make as much propaganda as possible and it ended with this gem of pure shit
        it makes me as mad as amazon's lord of the rangs show

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's a fanfiction classic.

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What is the position of the Ents in this story ?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This is a hard question to answer. They might simply represent the elderly who want nothing to do with new conflicts rising and the new changes of the world. Or they're just one of many ways Tolkien expressed the need to protect nature from industry.

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    fucking moskal orcs

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    We was Saurons army
    Lets go boys

    0-2 Corsair of Umbar
    3 - 5 Variag
    6 / 7 Khand soldier
    8 Haradrim
    9 Easterling

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You spelled Shanghai wrong.

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Dwarven partisans attack an anti-Dwarvetic Russian Cave Troll. 1944, colourized

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Orcs are the good guys in 2022 because they oppose this.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >n-word dwarf 'princess'

      Kek.

  23. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Russians love fantasies about russia being the most powerful country in the world. It's really funny, there are so many schizo books like this. Stalin fantasy and sci-fi is a whole genre in itself.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Stalin sci-fi
      that sounds entertaining are there english translations

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Sorry, but you will miss out on this phenomenon.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          wew. maybe its enough just to have seen that cover.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Ukrainians love fantasies about ukraine beinge powerful, democratic and relevant
      >It's really funny, there are so many schizo newsoutlets like this, and all non-schizo stuff is banned

      Fixed ye

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You should be at front n-word

  24. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Уймиcь хoхлинa

  25. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine reading a fantasy book about a race that hates humans, enslave humans, and still siding with them.

  26. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I tried to find a copy of the book a while ago, but couldn't.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Here you go
      https://royallib.com/book/eskov_kirill/posledniy_koltsenosets.html

  27. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >This book attempts to tell an alternative version of the story: Mordor is a peaceful constitutional monarchy that has worked hard for industrialization. But the elves felt threatened by an increasingly powerful Mordor (thanks to industrialization)
    It's literally irony on pidorashka and sovok and revanchist's ideas, you idiot

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