>realize I'm transwoman
>therapist suggests engaging with trans people and the queer community
>find a trans counselor in my area
>make appointment in hopes getting some help or confidence
>counselor is a 6'2" and 60+ yo fat gorillamoder, literally looks like a garbage bag with a wig, trashy leopard print and way too short dress
>manliest voice ever, sounds like every 60 yo fat dude
>literally looks and behaves like a man in a woman costume
>extremely awkward conversation, I'm immediately uncomfortable
>tells me nothing I didn't know before
>I end the appointment quickly and leave
>misgender her in my head and when talking to others later that day
>be even more confused as before
>think I will nbaw because I'm an oldshit myself
How fucked is this. I'm trans and still can't acknowledge this person as female even though she was sitting there in a dress, with breast implants and everything. It was grotesque.
Is this my fate as well?