OBJECTIVE - GET INTO SMART CON FOR FREE

HOW DO I DO IT?

  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Assassination contracts on bouncers

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Turn yourself into a pickle and hid an a paying attendee's ass

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    make and laminate a company ID.
    buy a bluish jumpsuit and hat with logo
    walk around with a ladder.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i was thinking something like this
      walking around with a bag of mcdonalds or something pretending to make a delivery
      or applying for a press pass and just impersonating some shitty crypto blogger
      should i just steal valor and demand entry as a thanks for my service?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        grab a mop and bucket from the janitor closet.
        tell them someone shat themselves.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This guy gets it. Put on a toolbelt, carry yourself like you're supposed to be there and people will rarely if ever challenge you.
      Just speaking from experience as a contractor, don't hesitate or stop to talk to peons who give you an odd glance. They know their minimum wage isn't worth getting into some altercation, they also know on a subconscious level they aren't privvy to the ins and outs of a function/location. Have some backup quip like "I'm a vendor here working on the fire alarm" or something for the extra nosey plebs.
      You can literally go anywhere you want, so long as you look the part.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You sound like Ricky from trailer park boys

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        "Sergey could be here" he thought, "I've never been to smartcon before. Sergey could be anywhere." The toolbelt felt tight around his waist. "I LOVE CHAINLINK" he thought. with a toolbelt you can go anywhere you want. An audiobook of the chainlink whitepaper reverberated through all of the tools hanging from his waist. "With a toolbelt, you can go anywhere you want" he said to himself out loud

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You gotta go down on your knees and earn your entrance fee the old fashioned way

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    go buy some fast food.
    tell them your from grubhub.

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wear a neon vest and carry a ladder

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Register website www.goldmansags.com

    Use an email address from your newly acquired domain.

    Tell them you need 2 tickets asap because your looking to onboard 2 enterprise customers on blockchain.

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    do this but with two obese dudes and a blue flannel instead of a trench coat

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    start shooting and when everyone is running, sneak in.
    when they start up again, you'll already be inside.

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    tell them youre a mod or janny for preddit or LULZ
    youre gonna have to dress up as a dickless tranny for this one.

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    cover yourself with literal shit, walk right in.
    no one is going to risk touching you out of fear of getting literal shit on themselves.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    just try to walk right on in.
    if they stop you, insinuate that they wont let you in because your black or a tranny or both.
    cause a huge scene.

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    make a contraption in a box that will expel smoke.
    "accidentally" trip and expel the smoke.
    immediately look around and go like "OH SHIT RUN RUN RUN!"
    as the security runs, walk right on in, or run in as if you were seeking safety.

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Disguise yourself as Sirgay

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    just show up. they will need bodies to fill the space otherwise it will look completely empty. they will let you in free

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