Imagine if we cared about soccer....

Imagine if we cared about soccer....

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    too bad he would be playing for france

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Dead by 30 lol

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      He’ll be dead by the time he is 18.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      why do midwits think living a long time is a good thing? what's the point of living 100 years as a slug?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        You're right, you should kys this instant
        The flame that burns half as long burns twice as bright, eh?

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >PEDs at 13 years old
    >Brain damage due to concussion at 23
    >Liver fails at 50
    >dead at 65
    Such is the life of the american Black

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >65
      At that size you won’t make it past 45

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    if y'all cared about football, you'd play your shitty USA league and then named the winner the world champion

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      American football is a strategy masterpiece. Soccer is people pretending they don’t have hands for 90 minutes, you know, the thing that separates us from other animals?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Being able to run for 90 minutes is also what separates us from other animals, bad example.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Amen to that brother. I grew up in a little town south of the Kentucky border... things were simple. You tended the farm, raised the herd... and if anyone gave you shit? Son, you beat the fricker down. You were a man. And under that hot alabama sun you learned the values of christ, america, and manhood- the missisipi trio as my pop called it... may god bless his soul... And a man like me? Well when we weren’t out hunting or at the bar? We watched sport. None of that pussy european shit- real sport, arizona sport. I’d get back home... hang up my duster, cold beer, my girl cooking some fineeee BBQ... and id watch muscular, toned black men. Sometimes they’d collide into each other, sometimes bounce a ball... but they were always fine specimens. I’d watch those darkies sweat and toil for hours... and I’ll admit my loins stirred more than once... called it the texas rise, heh... and when I watched those guys play, my mind... wandered. I imagined them taking my girl... like animals- hoo boy did that get me goin! I remember, in the 12th ad break of the NFL playoffs powered by mcdonalds I’m loving it, right after the arbys presents: the danger kick! I noticed my missus watching those stallions on screen... stroking that pussy of hers. And I tell you what... without a word I drove her down the city, philidelphia- my home- and she made love to every Black person in sight. I milked my johnson more than ever that night. So when you pussy europeans talk about sport.... remember what REAL men play

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Straightest American

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          and people think bbc is a zoomers thing

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          anyone got that pasta that talks about roided Black folks' wingspans and shit?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        it's a marketing strategy masterpiece I agree, who could have imagined that you can put so many commercials and timebreaks in a hour and still find people to call it a sport

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Y'all
      Stopped reading

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >y'all
      Started seething

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    How the hell do people above 5'10 get fat? Do you pigs eat every 30 minutes or something? People in that height range need like 4000 calories to get fat.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I’m 6’7. I need to eat around 3100 calories just to maintain my weight. It’s around four full meals + some extra calories

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Hot

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Now you understand american football. Starving thirdies have no idea how difficult it is to gain weight while working as a professional athlete. You should look up the diet that offensive linemen have to eat during the season. It's unbelievable.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >sport requires you to eat ungodly amounts of calories

        Ah yes, I can understand why Americans enjoy that so much.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Only about 8 of the ~80 players on a team.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I think they supplement their caloires by eating a lot of calorie dense trash food. Im trying to gain weight and i have a really hard time getting above 2600 kcal with healthy food, but if i eat a bag of chips i easily balloon my total calories to excessive amounts.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      it's very easy actually

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      They drink lots of coke

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Coke doesn't make you fatter

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >sugar doesn’t make you fatter

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      have you seen the average american diet?

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Dat homie big

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >not even that tall
    >literally just 15 and fat

    god I hate reddit so much

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    he has b***h tities... in Brazil we would paint his nails and frick him right in the ass

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    This guy would have no ball control, so would get thrown in defence. Where he would proceed to get turned at every given moment. He may be strong and fast, but with a body that size he won't be agile enough and would probably end up gassed in 30 minutes.

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    you gotta run across a field without stopping every 30 seconds

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    isnt that the giant Black person that fell off a roller coaster and died

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    You care about football, though.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      why the frick do asians love basketball? I swear half of NBA viewership has to be west coast asians

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >a team full of Lukakus

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine if we actually cared about soccer

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Imagine if Americans cared about darts...

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        You do
        You're just not very good

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        How can human be so big

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Wow! a fat Black person with breasts!! this must the american jesus christ.

    Thanks god you are all commit suicide

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    homie looking like a constipated frog

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Never understood these posts

    We all around the world have strongmen, boxers, rugbiers and so on but that body type is shit for "soccer" since you also need speed and agility

  18. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    "Soccer" doesn’t work like that

  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >that man is 15 years old

    *shivers*

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    He'd get gassed in 5 min and die of an heart attack

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      we can only hope

  21. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    what you guys been pumping in to him?
    this is not normal.

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    He would be shit at it with that body look at those scrawny legs

  23. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >15 years old
    >looks like a circus freak
    at least he'll flip a mean burger

  24. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Made for pushing his girlfriend down a flight of stairs

  25. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Someone post the bacon bowl copypasta from yesterday

  26. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Lmao the Japanese soccer players would run circles around this inertialet.

  27. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    he could just block the entire goal. checkmate yuropoors

  28. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    he's going to charlotte. biff is recruiting him hard

  29. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >ginormous exemple of muscular human being
    >still have sugar breasts and flamingo legs

  30. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    What do they feed to American teens? When I was growing up even the biggest lads were DYEL tier. They all seem to bench 100kg/225lb at the age of 15 as well.

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