I'm a 30 year old woman who has never been in a long term relationship. I've dated 2 guys, for about 2 months each; they both broke up with me. I've never been loved romantically or been told "I love you" from a man.
idk how to find a decent man who actually wants to be with me. I'm below average looks-wise. I try to be supportive and loyal, but I'm just not the most interesting person. Plus I'm awkward and really bad at socializing or meeting new people so dating is hard for me. The loneliness gets more crushing with each passing year. How can I find a patient man who wants to have a family with an autistic woman?
you are on LULZ, sweetie...this is the last place to ask for such advice...
anyway, go out, touch grass...and don't fret...not everyone is entitled to a partner or their own family...find happiness within first, everything else follows eventually
oh, and don't settle for someone below your standards simply because you feel your clock ticking or because you are desperate...this will end in a disaster
your people destroyed the Earth. You deserve to suffer.
lmao. Show me a road that doesnt end in disaster.
>find happiness within first, everything else follows eventually
People always say that but how can I be happy when I'm so lonely? My most recent relationship - if you can call it that - ended a little while ago. I was happy when dating him, I would have been more than glad to continue but he ended it without much explanation. It sucks to feel unwanted and unlovable
Woman can date at any time. If you only dated for four months in your life that's on you. You sound addicted to feeling bad for yourself. "Unlovable" is baby shit, utter nonsense.
idk about that, I've never been popular with guys. Even at my most attractive as a teen/young adult, guys my age didn't express interest in me. It was just creepy strange men 20+ years my senior who would proposition me sometimes
It's hard to find someone who
>is genuinely interested in me
>doesn't just want sex
>I'm also into
>has the same desires (marriage + kids)
Plus I have no interest in jumping from guy to guy. I just want a stable committed relationship
I'm certain you could be with a decent man in a matter of months. You just said you have autism and feel bad for yourself so those aspects of your brain, life, and personality are obstructing your goals if not preventing their formation entirely. With mental and social hangups things that are normally very easy become difficult. It doesn't bode well for you that you're thirty and blaming your appearance or some nonsense about unlovability; that's what a kid does.
yup you’re completely clueless
>It sucks to feel unwanted and unlovable
love yourself
>how can I be happy when I'm so lonely?
Humans are social beings, so being lonely will always suck. You gotta cope somehow. Do you have friends? Family? Connect with them. Point is that you shouldn't revolve your life around another human and depend on them emotionally. But you are talking to an anti-social loner, so take my advice (any advice) with a grain of salt.
i know the feel
its good to have enough sustenance as an individual that you dont need someone else, this is easier said than done but it will rescue you from this ideal codependent fantasy that no person ever really could fulfill
feel better anon
compromise. the people who are willing to give you want you want are not going to look the way you want. your most likely going to bag someone who you would be laughed at by your friends (if you have them) while being with them in public. If you can work past your own expectations, bite the bullet, go out, and start hitting on men that find you attractive. When asked for what your looking for, start with the word “friends”, then work your way towards opening up. If you hit them too early on with how desperate you feel, you’ll scare off the men like skittish deer. Good luck. If that doesn’t work get into magic and summon something to help you get what you want. Your already weird, why not go for the party prize.
>patient man
it's all tiresome, I get the feeling there's something else you're not telling about yourself that drive men away.
>I'm a 30 year old woman
At this point in life you should be able to tell when a guy is just trying to dick you or really care about you but if you're indeed autistic/socially awkward enough you might not be able to tell and that's a problem.
I would say lower your expectations, go with somebody who cares about you and channel your issues into something else other than making a problem out of bs.
By 'patient man' I mostly mean someone who can deal with my autism. I can be slow to warm up and just kind of slow in general tbh
idk sounds like nothing tbqh, I've seen doods chase over women far worse than "just a little slow" maybe there's something else about you that you're not fully aware of or not willing to admit, anyway take your time having to know people, you might be missing out on somebody or hanging around the wrong crowd.
I think it's mostly a combination of those multiple factors. If it were only that I was a little slow, or only that I wasn't great looking, or only that I was boring, etc then it would be easier to find + keep a man
No. See
>I try to be supportive and loyal
this is very good
>I'm just not the most interesting person
it's not that important if you are as above and connect with someone
>I'm below average looks-wise
But you can work on your looks, that's within your control.
>How can I find a patient man who wants to have a family with an autistic woman?
have you gone to asperger support groups around you? might be at a church or university.
M. I'm sorry to hear. I'm sure you are average, in positive light. We're all awkward and bad at socializing, that's why we are here too. Just keep your toys near, maybe a cat companion too, so you don't go crazy and do something stupid, and keep your chin up. Godspeed sister.
Are you fat ? Did you try to dress nicely and put on some make-up ? Did you try to do something, anything to flirt with someone?
No
I alternate between wearing frumpy and flattering clothes. tbh I'm not a big makeup person but I wear a little sometimes
Unfortunately I'm terrible at flirting
literally all you have to do is be skinny and put yourself out there. you’ll be ahead of 90% of women
Lol no way dude she already thinks the dudes that do hit on her are creepy cuz too old
She’s retarded, and most likely broke
She could find someone older that isn’t but that’s beneath her
So essentially I guess she can enjoy being single
Welcome to the blackpill, femcel edition. You're old and probably not ugly (most women are beautiful but think they're ugly) but you are seriously running out of time if it's not too late already. Remember that fertility significantly drops in your mid 30s.
>long term, romantically
qualifying keywords in case anyone missed it
but if this isn't a bait, I don't care about social bullshit or whatever
But I have this sinking feeling you have no opinions or interest about anything that matters to me either
Ignore the trolls, who are all tenage virgins.
At your age, the teenage dating scene doesn't exist, which is a good thing. You are FAR more likely to meet men as friends, colleagues, workmates, friends-of-friends or other non-romantic ways and THEN move together romantically.
So increase your friend circle of all genders, to increase the pool of men