I'm 23 and I've never had sex. People have told me my feelings will chsnge when the right guy comes along, but sex just seems too invasive and gross so I don't want any part of it.
Guys are really insistent sometimes and it makes going out a chore, and often they seem to take it personally. To the guys here, what would you take as a sign that a woman is 1000000% uninterested in sex or a relationship?
Op i think you are asexual
don't listen to this twitter transvestite. you don't have to adopt some faggy label because you don't want to have sex.
I don't want to have sex, that doesn't mean I have to be asexual. I don't want to have periods, that doesn't mean I have to go start taking hormones and become a man.
yea I know.
I don't like the idea of depending on a man, like how would I ever really be able to be at peace trusting him when he could decide he likes someone else better at any moment?
Part of myself I hate is I daydream sometimes about being married, having kids, and living in some rural cottage. That's like giving up all my sense of control over to someone else though and flushing my dreams away. I want to do more important stuff than that.
from the moment I learned what sex was, I hated it. I don't want someone to stick anything inside me, I don't want any stuff getting left in there, and I don't want to get pregnant. So I avoid guys. Some guys try to get close anyway and get upset when I don't treat them like I'm into them.
I never got abused sexually as a kid. My family is very liberal and was open to accepting me whether straight or lesbian but they all seem kind of annoyed that I'm not interested in anyone.
I guess its not consistent for every guy then, because my past experience just telling people openly has been met with mixed results.
>Mixed results
Well ya some guys are just going to try harder because some women actually just reject guys they are interested in to get the guy to try harder and it sets a shitty precedent that affects other people, doesn't mean you should still say no it just takes more tries, what is the alternative in your mind, say yes? That's obviously not what you want either
>Doesn't mean you shouldn't*
I don't understand how anybody likes sex. Its gross, you're letting some big guy who could kill you or do whatever he wsnts to you handle you when you're at your most vulnerable. This is something people like? and the guy expects you to be happy about it too? Then it leads into all the relationship bs and it all just seems like a scam designed to make men happy. Like how is this not exploitive? and my only defense is to just keep telling guys no until they take the hint, or be a shut-in?
Maybe you are just built different, I guess a question I have for you is do you masturbate? Because if you do then it seems disingenuous to not understand why people enjoy sex but if you don't like masturbating then maybe sex isn't for you. Also on the "he could kill me thing" I don't think getting murdered while having sex is really that common, it's probably a little more common than getting struck by lightning but I know someone who has gotten struck by lightning and no one who has gotten murdered during sex. Also like, the man is vulnerable to during sex like, it's 2023 if you can't kill a man almost as easily as he could kill you with all the convenience modern technology provides then you are just retarded
>you're letting some big guy who could kill you or do whatever he wsnts to you handle you when you're at your most vulnerable
It goes both ways tbh. The guy is also trusting the girl not to go full Gone Girl and have a hidden knife under the pillow to shank him with mid-thrust.
The whole point of sex is having complete trust in each other and embracing whatever connection you have. I think you're making sex out to be some slippery slope to homemaker life which is absolutely not true.
Going back to
what dreams do you have and why do you think meeting a guy who could be your potential husband would ruin your future?
Yeah my girlfriend really likes me manhandling her and running off to our secret spot while my boner is literally poking through her tights. The first time I did that she went from crying (she was blaming herself over an issue in our relationship) to laughing, to horny and really wild during sex. This is something plenty of girls like I believe.
If you are afraid of masculine men, would you be attracted to timid, feminine men then? If no, I think you just don't like men then.
>im such a manly man raping my gf hur durr
yea as soon as the wall hits you will spread your cheeks to shit out kids anyways
classic
Then you might be sex repulsed which means when a person is disgusted by or disinterested in sex
you are not normal and you best start becoming normal
because as a women being old and lonely is extremely horrible
sex is a tool to keep men invested in you
men are motivated by sex
women use sex as the tool to obtain resources
if you view it like this
then you can maybe enjoy sex from a pure profit kind of viewpoint
>23 years old never had sex
>is a woman
Something is wrong with you for sure, hundreds of millions of men would jump at the chance to fuck you, even more depending on your looks. You said it's gross and invasive so perhaps you were raped or molested as a child and you don't realize? Maybe talk to a therapist.
>To the guys here, what would you take as a sign that a woman is 1000000% uninterested in sex or a relationship?
Telling me exactly that so I can count my losses and hook up with a different girl. It's that easy.
If she said "I am a not interested in sex or a relationship" I might believe her
>sex just seems too invasive and gross
Maybe you're just going out with the wrong guys. Sex shouldn't feel that way and should instead be an intimate experience for both you and your partner.
Emotional and romantic*** sorry it's a lot to text
22 and never fucked, had the chance multiple times but sex is something super personal and don't want to have it with someone who isn't my whole world.
just a hint for you, since i feel many girls are retarded by now and i hear the same tropes from them time and time again, if you dont give a guy even a chance to go out on a date with you, nobody is ever gonna be your whole world or even get to know you sweaty
It might be your looks. It could also be you got close to guys with social anxiety who didn’t know how to make a move. It’s hard to say. Most women can get laid pretty easily now a days but only if they are pretty.
Do you ever masturbate?
If you've got no sex drive at all then that's one thing, but maybe you just need to find a twink that lets you dominate him.
I don't masturbate, the idea scares me. Like if I like it and become obsessed, that would be a nightmare.
>what dreams do you have and why do you think meeting a guy who could be your potential husband would ruin your future?
I have a moral feeling that if you have a husband and kids, they need to be your priority over everything else in the world. The kids especially; they never asked to be born, so you have a responsibility to make sure they're as well off as they can be and raising kids alone is supposed to be super hard so to make it manageable you almost have to keep their dad happy so he sticks around which means more stuff you don't necessarily want to be doing that you're doing as a responsibility. Sometimes I think it would be nice to have a family like that, but I don't want to have my ambitions take a back seat. I want to run my own bakery.
This sounds a lot like what my therapist said, and my parents, and everybody else in my life. I appreciate the advice but it just does not feel true to my experience.
you are not special
obv leaving out
i also doubt you never ever touched yourself and are 23, pretty much impossible, people get curious and sex is spammed in normie vidya everywhere
I have been curious and I have wanted to try, but I'm just scared I'll end up obsessed with guys and sex if I try anything sexual. I like being out of all that so I can focus on other stuff.
You sound like you are on a life trajectory to join convent/nunnery, good for you
nobody is as retarded as never touching their own genitals till 23
>If I like it and become obsessed that would be a nightmare
... uh... how, exactly?
I think you've just got weird hangups around sex. Masturbating's like drinking alcohol. It feels nice but only people who are really fucked up develop an addiction to it. Try it sometime
>I want to run my own bakery
It doesn't matter if you said that literally or figuratively, you can do the stuff you want and still have sex and/or a relationship, you dumbass
>I want to do more important stuff than that.
Ah yes, I'm sure you will make great contributions to international relations, or the Quantum Fields Theory, or development of a super AI and alikes, so you can't have sex, I totally understand
What the fuck do you think you're up to? You've probably never even set foot inside a worthwhile university and yet you're worried that you would lose all control of your life because of a ficticious marriage
>This sounds a lot like what my therapist said, and my parents, and everybody else in my life. I appreciate the advice but it just does not feel true to my experience.
You don't HAVE to have sex or masturbate, but I think you would benefit from understanding you're just a meaningless monkey battling for survival on a rock drifting through a fucking weird universe that nobody really understands. Whatever meaning you try to attach to your life is invalid deep inside.
Anything we can truly experience are just our senses and how our body reacts to stimuli, and to experience good sex and/or true love are AMAZING human experiences you should be open to.
You can get over the being gross / weird / vulnerable thing, it simply "is what it is" and it doesn't mean you can't be smart about it.
There are at least five hundred times more interesting men than interesting women on the planet, filter out the shallow retards that live on autopilot and you can have a good sample to start experimenting / building something with.
To sum up my advice: stop worrying about social bullshit and labels in this overpoliticized oversexualized society and worry more about your experience
You're not missing much. Sex is hugely overated.
>never had sex
welcome to the incel club
>i dont like sex
how can you know if you never had it?
Anyway with this mindset you wont like sex either way, that is for sure. If woman cannot get into proper mood her vagina will be dry as desert so it will only hurt a lot and she will forever internalize sex as punishment and torture.
And frankly your kind is common among women. Unlike men which needs to crave sex in order to breed, for women liking sex is purely optional. You wont be first nor last woman who will use sex as purely socio-economical tool to manipulate men.
Now since we are on /adv board, lets sprinkle you with easy advice: learn how to masturbate. Occasional masturbation feels great, there are even some minor health benefits and for many people it functions better than meditation and similar.
buy some small vibrator, dont even use it for penetration, just the vibes on top will do the trick. alternatively shower (running water) heads are very popular among ladies. Also very popular are various books from red library or femboys ala link from zelda featured in various scenarios on sites like
>e-hentai.org/?f_search=link
The chance is small, but if you will stop being disgusted by your own pussy the idea of sex wont be as bad as it is now. And if not, well who cares. As i said you wont be first nor last wife in dead bedroom marriage.
Don't force sex, it will feel wrong.
Find a man that you like, date him for a good long while, then eventually it'll just come. Just don't be resistant to it, you can if you want, but it's an opportunity to grow emotionally. That kind of contact changes how you see people in general.
Just don't whore out if you end up liking it, that's even worse.
And don't get knocked up by a sorry ass homosexual who won't stay, just give it time to be sure, watch him.
how dare you call my divine opinion "retarded" and spout drivel about "The One" (capitalized). maybe don't listen to a guy who's entire idea of romance is derived from books and TV. how dare you try to talk to real humans.