If you're 30+ and unmarried

What's it like? Would you rather be married? How's your family taking it?
Pic unrelated

  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >What's it like?
    All I do is distract myself with entertainment and hobbies.
    >Would you rather be married?
    A good marriage is ideal, but no marriage is better than a bad marriage.
    >How's your family taking it?
    They think I'm gay.

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'll cheat because I'm 27
    Feels good honestly

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Over half of 30 year olds are unmarried.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Work > home > work > home with little distractions in between.

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    My gf is 33
    Shes a virgin too which is crazy.
    Im 26.
    I think we’re going to break up though.
    I think id fall in love with her but her family hates me to an outrageous extent.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >older gf
      yikes

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Who cares about family? I spent 6 years without talking to mine one time.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >gf
      >haven't had sex yet
      What.

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I hate feeling unwanted but at the same time I find 80 percent of people unbearably boring so I know its best that I'm not lowing my standards or compromising my personality too much. I would hate to be locked into one of those dull, passionless relationships that most people seem to have
    I live well on my own but I know I would be poor if I had a family. I dream about making money (shamelessly plugging my thread here

    [...]

    ) and I have a sad feeling that earning a little more would make me feel worthy of love
    My family doesn't ever comment on my relationship status, I don't know and don't care what they think

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm 31 and despite all the memes about wizardry etc. I'm still hopeful for the future. Doomer and demoralizing posters talking about your life being "over" in your thirties are beyond retarded. I may have failed to launch but I'm working hard every day and each year is marginally more tolerable than the last despite being single this whole time.

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >What's it like?
    Mostly fine.
    >Would you rather be married?
    If nothing else is different no.
    >How's your family taking it?
    The writing was on the wall in my teens no one is surprised.

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    33 year old virgin here.
    I used to be full of angst and longing, then something in me snapped around age 26. I cried for 3 days and I have never felt emotion again at all ever since then. Just a completely flat inner world, like a totally placid lake. I never feel anything, not happiness, not sadness, not fear, not anxiety, not elation, just nothing.
    My family doesn't mention women to me. In fact, they have never brought up women or relationships to me at all. I was always a weird kid and a little odd looking so I think it was just understood that women were not in the cards for me.
    I have a high paying, prestigious job, a stable life, I own my home. I spend my time playing the piano, working out, studying foreign languages, and learning sculpture in my backyard. If you saw me on the street you would think I was a well-adjusted, moderately attractive young man. I'm in the best shape of my life and have a great body. I'm capable of being charming and gregarious when I need to. But I have no friends or socialization at all. I have no desire or need for it anymore. I'm not really sure what happened to me, I guess I just went full schizo and moved beyond normal human experience. I just go to work, make money, come home, and masturbate to elaborate, strange inner fantasies. I'll probably end up killing myself after my family passes on and my body starts to deteriorate.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      wow man, your journey sounds fascinating to me. if you want to, could you elaborate on that 3 day crying spell you had? did anything trigger it? and did your inner world before this feel vibrant and ever changing? any mental illness in your family that might have caused this?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >did anything trigger it?
        I was aimlessly walking through campus after having failed another semester of classes because I never showed up. I was very confused about my life and where I was going. I didn't know who I was or what I was doing. It was an extremely beautiful day outside. The trees were just beginning to change color and the weather was gorgeous. I was surrounded by attractive, young, happy people enjoying the day and each other's company. They were everywhere. I felt the contract between my inner world and the outer world so acutely and suddenly. There was beauty, good will, and happiness all around me and yet I felt totally isolated from it. I realized I was not a part of it and I never could be. It was like a lifetime's worth of errors and failings had accumulated and then all hit me at once.
        >did your inner world before this feel vibrant
        I was an extremely sensitive kid with an active imagination. I could easily be brought to tears by music or works of art even as a child and would get obsessive with them. Probably autistic but never taken to a doctor or tested or anything. I also had an inexplicable white-hot cruel streak.
        >any mental illness in your family
        I wouldn't know, my family was very poor when I was growing up. One of my earliest memories is my mom serving me and my sisters slices of bread for dinner and crying silently and trying to hide it. Even if any of us had mental illness it isn't the kind of thing that is acknowledged or cared for in the lower classes.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          really interesting stuff, thank you for sharing.
          it's incredible, i also am learning the piano, bought some clay and started sculpting 2 months ago, have been overly sensitive all my life and in love with music, movies, art in general, but have similarly felt my complex, fluid, ever evolving inner world being completely crushed to a dead, barren, unfeeling desert lately. my dissipation was caused by trying to bridge this gap and really participate in the real world, i spread myself too thin and have lost myself.
          godspeed brother, maybe one day you'll find that inner kid again, the world isn't so bad i think

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I think some of us have already died. We’re just still here for the well-being of family, and clinging on to a sliver of hope. Once that’s gone, there’s no other reason to stay.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      cool! i cut my emotions around age 17 when i got dumped. am 37 now, met a girl that made me realize ive been stupid for doing tha.. lifes back to normal, i have like a worthy, free feeling

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's lonely. Since everyone else this age is either married with kids, or they are manchildren. No I don't want to play magic the gathering, marvel movies are terrible and I won't pretend that they aren't. I just want a woman to take care of and impregnate.

    I'm close to that right now. I worked hard and found a nice woman who lives with me now. But she is also over 30 and more experienced in relationships than me. I don't think she'll ever love me, I think she's loved and lost too many times. So I think if I marry this woman, life will continue to be lonely, but maybe that's just how it is for everyone.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I think she's loved and lost too many times.

      makes 'em cold-hearted, it does

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        True. Repeated trauma and disappointment effect your ability to trust and be vulnerable.

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I was married, modern women are shit

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Could be worse. I'm not even 30 yet and my marriage ended. Count your blessings everyone cause life is a hell of a ride.

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    not married. i wanted to be married since i was in teens, and that made me desperate. i still feel a bit desperate, but i recognize it's stupid. getting married is a much bigger deal than i had anticipated, so im glad i didn't do something incredibly stupid, although people who find a life time so are super lucky. if it's meant to be it's meant to be.
    life's doubly hard in regard to expenses and dealing with problems. parents help out married kids, and 2 people paying off a mortgage is better than 1. but i feel bad for anyone stuck in an unhappy marriage for years and decades

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'm 34 and thought I would have been married a long time ago. Instead I'm single, live with my parents, and otherwise wonder where I fucked up in life. Life consists entirely of my job, being at home, and seeing my friends a few times a year; since they live very far away. I did have a GF I thought I was going to marry, but got ghosted some years ago. I haven't had sex in 5 years, haven't been on a date in 4. It's not all what it's cracked up to be.

      >did anything trigger it?
      I was aimlessly walking through campus after having failed another semester of classes because I never showed up. I was very confused about my life and where I was going. I didn't know who I was or what I was doing. It was an extremely beautiful day outside. The trees were just beginning to change color and the weather was gorgeous. I was surrounded by attractive, young, happy people enjoying the day and each other's company. They were everywhere. I felt the contract between my inner world and the outer world so acutely and suddenly. There was beauty, good will, and happiness all around me and yet I felt totally isolated from it. I realized I was not a part of it and I never could be. It was like a lifetime's worth of errors and failings had accumulated and then all hit me at once.
      >did your inner world before this feel vibrant
      I was an extremely sensitive kid with an active imagination. I could easily be brought to tears by music or works of art even as a child and would get obsessive with them. Probably autistic but never taken to a doctor or tested or anything. I also had an inexplicable white-hot cruel streak.
      >any mental illness in your family
      I wouldn't know, my family was very poor when I was growing up. One of my earliest memories is my mom serving me and my sisters slices of bread for dinner and crying silently and trying to hide it. Even if any of us had mental illness it isn't the kind of thing that is acknowledged or cared for in the lower classes.

      Bro you need therapy bad, I don't mean that in a meme way either- find out wtf is going on in your mind and work from there. Little to lose at this point.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I would be concerned as well if such a thing happened to me so suddenly but I don't think his lifestyle is a problem in any way. Same way if I was autistic but it made me a supergenius or something

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Be glad you're free. I can't divorce my wife without becoming a weekend dad and being reduced to living like a pauper from alimony and child support. I'm little better than an indentured servant now. Never get married.

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I’m getting close. Currently 26. My mom has increasingly been meaning “jokes” about my wife/her meeting her daughter in law. Dad doesn’t say anything, even encourages me to avoid it. Step parents don’t care. Grandmas parents occasionally make passing remarks. Siblings don’t care. I don’t care. I would like kids if it were easier, both to raise them an secure female attention, but that’s not the world we live in.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Meant to say “grandparents”, not Grandma’s parents, but they probably would care if still kicking

  16. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You start to hit an age where all the quality, marriage-material girls start deciding they want to settle down and get off the market, and it all happens pretty quickly. Then one day you wake up and realise it's just you and a whole bunch of leftovers who are desperately trying to find someone who isn't completely fucking awful in some major way before they all get snapped up. A miserable, soul-sucking affair where time always feels like it's running out.

    Men absolutely love the idea that they can just indefinitely postpone getting married. That they can stop their lifestyle of gaming and self-indulgence and settle down with a high quality girl any time they like. This is a colossal mistake. No matter how much you wish it were otherwise, you're going to find it very hard to marry a 28 year old (that you'd want to marry) when you're pushing 40. Very few men turn into a silver fox. Also, never underestimate how much baggage a person picks up over the course their life and how much harder it is to deal with that in a relationship.

    If you seriously want a fulfilling, long-lasting marriage, my best advice is to seriously start looking once you hit 30. You pretty much have your pick of the high-quality women at that age (in that few will be locked down yet, you still have your looks and you're starting to have some money). Start getting your shit together, have a good amount of savings that you can put towards a house deposit and get rid of your debts. Don't ditch a girl you really like because you want to sleep around and have fun unless you're absolutely sure you can get someone like that again.

  17. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's pretty peaceful actually. My family is alright with it because only my brother is alive. We're both pretty close and he's got his own family. So I'm happy, it's all good.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >My family is alright with it because only my brother is alive. We're both pretty close and he's got his own family.
      Are you one of those twins that died in childbirth and is now haunting the other twin? You do know that ghosts are not expected to marry, right?

Your email address will not be published.