I am impacted for life in many ways from abusing LSD and DMT several times a week for over a year. It's interesting how the stuff deranges your mind like a parasite almost (the ones that latch onto crickets and make them suicide into water), so that you become more and more obsessed with using the drug... You begin to not really notice or acknowledge the side effects as it overtakes your mind.
Some interesting side effects from the DMT abuse:
1) Severe memory issues. You know when you open a tab to Google something and don't remember what it was? That happens 24/7 but with everything, including why I walked into a room, where I was going when I start driving, list goes on. I lose my phone every day. Encompasses every aspect of memory.
2) I trip every time I wake up from sleep. If I slept deeply for some hours anyway (doesn't happen if I only slept lightly). I will be in a psychedelic state of mind for about half hour or more after waking.
3) Bizarre intrusive esoteric thoughts literally every single day. I have religious thoughts far more often than I think about sex.
4) Loss of libido.
Sounds dope
maybe try fasting...i dunno. sorry you're going through that.
Well the period of abuse was over 2 years ago. And I haven't touched drugs at all since Nov or Dec 2021. So I suspect the impact is lifelong.
I study neurobiology and one thing people severely underestimate is the brain's ability to reconfigure and heal over time when given the chance. If you're serious about abstaining from drugs, having a good diet with some supplements (vitamins B/C/D, magnesium, etc), and moving your body around often, your state will improve.
Abusing psychedelics has likely permanently altered the epigenetics and receptor expressions of several parts of your brain, but recovery is bound to happen to some capacity over the years. At least be glad you haven't deep-fried your brain with stimulants or benzos.
Nothing you said is scientifically accurate. There's no evidence psychedelics have permanent effects let alone effects on your genes. Stop talking out your ass
idk wether anon really knows anything about neuroscience but in any case you cant tell me that abusing ANY drug that way wont alter your neurons in a major way.
IMO youre a druggie coping real bad.
420 blaze it fgt.
epigenetic modification happens in response to literally every aspect of your environment at all times
you're ignorant at best and more likely just retarded
I know you're lashing out because that anon was correct, but psychedelics definitely have permanent effects on people.
I know two guys that did psychedelics for about ten years and it messed them up, majorly.
I got into an argument with one of them once on a road trip because he wouldn't believe me that leaving at 10am, on a 3 hour drive, would get us to the location for 1pm, he swore if we left at 1pm we'd get there for 1pm.
He gets phases where he has the mental capacity of a child, and honestly it's sad.
psychedelics are known to produce life altering experiences
where do you think that alteration takes place dumb stupid retard
no shit sherlock, hardcore drugs used often will damage your brain
wtf did you think is gonna happen?
mcstooodier, when you take drugs you destroy your brain. some of these things are very unlikely to just manifest back.
I had a large brain tumor removed 4 years ago, I feel pretty normal now. At 2 years out I didn't have any overt neurological problems, but my memory was shit and I would get weird auditory hallucinations (music, I knew it wasn't real but I still couldn't hear over it). Doctors weren't very interested and kept trying to give me antidepressants.
Not that our experiences are exactly the same but brains can heal a lot but it often takes time. Take care of yourself and have hope.
Also don't do drugs. I'm not sure why people try to deny that you can abuse psychedelics and damage yourself with them, everyone knows someone who this happened to. It's not bad in the same way as fentanyl but you are better off doing it just a few times, if at all.
Psychedelics are a cool experience and help wake people up. After that it's time to do the work without drugs.
You probably short circuited your bodily functioning somehow. Your dendrites need some time to grow back. Your brain and body need time to recalibrate.
Eat loads of high antioxidant foods and supplements from now on, and get your gut health in order with pre and probiotics. Drink bone broth by the gallon.
>been habbening for 2 years
>i suspect it will continue for the rest of my life
Some people are a child at heart.. some are a child at brain.
Honestly all of that seems like a good thing to me.
There's a reason memory fades for dreams and psychedelic trips, it's because it occurs at a deeper level than the "mind".
So if your thinking fades in the same way it just sounds to me like it's now occurring on a deeper level. Your thinking now probably contains aspects that don't even occur in the "human mind" at all. So when you lose focus on it you have no memory of it, because it wasn't "in the brain" in the first place.
I've actually had something like this my entire life. It's what some people call the "flow state". Whenever I get into that state my thinking is extremely intuitive and fluid, but at the same time if I lose focus then everything I was thinking about can fade like a dream, with no memory of it.
But that's also where I get some of my best ideas. Almost genius level insights sometimes.
As for your #2, that just sounds awesome, so I don't really need to say anything about that.
I get that flow state thing with math problems regularly. I'll be solving some kind of math problem and just blank out and can't remember what I was trying to do 8n the first place
As long as the math problem becomes solved, it's a good thing. If you actually blank out and are unable to do what you were supposed to be doing, that's the OPPOSITE of the flow state. In a flow state, intuition and reasoning integrate and you flow through your task with ease and enjoyment.
You are both unironically being manipulated by psychic parasites. That "twin flame" relationship is going to ruin both of your lives.
>There's a reason memory fades for dreams and psychedelic trips, it's because it occurs at a deeper level than the "mind".
I brought the person I'm sure is my twin flame into my life and I've had this experience with our conversations, particularly the intimate and meaningful ones. Profound, and forgotten. Usually I can pick up a pen and write out a conversation I just had. Not so with this person. I hope this is an explanation for what's occurring. I don't want to actually forget a single thing.
One man's natural flow state is another's nightmare.
Cant approach all states of existence with the same treatment.
Cant treat a case of the flu with chemotherapy. Cant fight of cancer with robitussin.
Now let's hear your knee jerk defensive response.
Hey what are your intrusive thoughts? tell me more about them
>If you get the message, hang up the phone. For psychedelic drugs are simply instruments, like microscopes, telescopes, and telephones. The biologist does not sit with eye permanently glued to the microscope, he goes away and works on what he has seen.
Truly sorry to know that it happened to you, OP.
Now stay away from it and work on yourself, perhaps try memory games, crosswords, puzzles, etc…
Sending some love your way, brother.
Minus the memory issue, that just sounds like my typical day.
this substance ruined my life. you have it easy. lost my entire family, 3 kids, wife of 15 years, job, could barely function for like 6-7 years. pulling out of it now, but am still so mind fucked that if I woke up tomorrow and it was 2013 again, and the last decade had been a complete mirage fabricated by the original trip that sent me down this hell well, I would not be surprised. the substance is truly that powerful. had to be sober for 5 years straight. even the smell of a passing cigarette would launch me into deep hellish psychosis because the notion of anything but 100% sobriety gave me life crippling ptsd and consume me with fear.
Pussy
thanks bro. visual hallucinations to the point i couldnt walk in a straight line (diagnosed legally blind cos I couldnt see through the visuals while completely sober for about 8 months) lost my drivers license obviously. spent a 3 months in a psyche ward. still have audio hallucinations that sound legitimately real. youd kys in that situation puss puss
Lol, your brain is literally too dumb to be able to tell reality from a drug trip.
t. never tried dmt. also your post reeks of teenager.
Sorry didn’t mean to turn you on
I have done every major psychedelic and many lesser known ones. Never touched a drug until my mid 20s so my brain wasnt fucked by doing drugs while still developing like a retard.
Get over it
Anon you won't get sympathy on LULZ. The only thing you can do now is make the best of your life. Don't touch the drugs again, work out to the extent you can, and find some meditative/spiritual/whatever techniques that stabilize you. You can't unfuck the past, but you can unfuck your psyche. Try the book practicing the power of now by eckhart tolle. They have it as an audio book on spotify. It's a little self help, but it's perhaps a start.
>1488
Oh that happened to me too by the way. I've had the same thoughts about waking up in a few mins from now and I'm lying there w the pipe and a bunch of friends around saying "how was it?"
I had an outside garden room built and don't even go in there because the room reminds me of using the drug. I'm probably going to have the whole room renovated so the scent of the rubber tiled floors don't remind me of tripping.
I know that feel. the rarest feel. good luck broseph
uh can you give us a tldr on what happened and how this hapened? cant believe a single trip would do this to you
glad the thread is still alive. ya basically back in the early 2010s i figured out how to make the stuff and started supplying my whole community so i had a bunch sitting around. one day i decided to go as deep down the rabbit hole as i possibly could to see whats om the other side. i loaded the bong and kept hitting it and filling it and kept going until i could not see this physical world anymore and was literally unable to load the bong. lasted about 45 seconds. towards the end whats could only be described as black lighting with black hole vibes started forcing itself into my peripheral vision in a very violent and irrefutable way. after i gave in, i had what can only be described as a heaven simulator. best trip ever, but very subtle traces of fear and darkness crept up as I started coming down like 30 minutes later. trips usually last about 10-15 so ya. but I was still full on tripping, just able to "open my eyes". Panic and fear are the achilles heel of the human mind. I could "see" the fear consuming me and my thoughts like a rabid virus moving at 100,000 MPH. once it grabs on it doesnt really let go lol. keep in mind I had never had a bad trip before ever. this includes LSD, mushies, ketamine, peyote etc. especially weed. What happened next is I dove deeeeep into this mind fucking mind loop that never ended. I would be walking down the hallway in my house and every step I took I would end up taking what felt like a couple hundred times before I could move on to my next step. reality was echoing indefinitely basically and a single 5 minute period of time was "perceived" by my mind as if it were hours. Fill in the blanks and 6 years later I was finally starting to see the light again, able to smoke weed again etc. Fucking brutal. lost everything and ruined my life. gl out there. I'm still convinced I'll wake up soon. given how insane reality is right now, it's not insane to believe so, especially when this substance unlocks the realization
exceeded word limit.
the realization that 100% of your current reality can be simulated by your mind. it is absolutely capable of simulating an entire matrix reality on its own. thanks for reading
I think you are fine and won't suddenly wake up bong in hand. If you compare a peak drug trip to this mundane LULZ browsing time, I can't imagine a drug trip being so flat as to involve posting on internet forums.
When you can't tell time anymore, you can at least count and also use a digital clock timer. I have been in "serious trouble" before but had a big as fuck digital clock with bright red figures. The numbers changing I knew meant that time was in fact moving and that it would end soon. But I was in real trouble with it.
Weirdly, on DMT time seemed to actually fast forward rather than slow down.
right but shitposting on the internet can be a brain simulation to comfort itself in the event of trauma. "going through the motions." thanks for your words
On DMT time doubles up and goes backwards
>LSD, mushies, ketamine, peyote
So, you already were a heavy drug user
>my whole community
So you are from a bad neighborhood, possibly black
>able to smoke weed again
>lost everything and ruined my life
It wasn't DMT that fucked you up. You did this to yourself, and you possibly got possessed by some hungry discarnate nigga, too.
I'm gonna be real, you sound like a fucking pussy
psychedelic drugs aren't that big a deal
Shill.
If DMT, the least harmful drug ever to exist, did that to you imagine if you tried meth
This is the effect it has on stupid, weak-minded people lol. Youte telling in yourself anon
Yeah okay, your mind is deranged from drugs and it convinces you they're amazing so you keep doing it over and over. That's why you think the drugs are amazing. Stop using for a year then try using again and you'll see how mangled you were.
You will stop talking retarded when it finally decides it doesn't want to play with you anymore. You really think you can fuck with the divine? True arrogance of man. You are being put in touch with literal divinity with harder drugs. Have some respect.
I don't do drugs all the time. I occasionally will have periods of time where I trip weekly and then months or years without doing them. Youre just weak
Oh okay you're so "mentally strong" you can fuck with god and literal divinity. Foolish (as in genuinely foolish - fuck around and find out stuff) manchild statements. The arrogance of man will be taken from you when the divine is sick of your presence and decides to not hsve smiling jesters welcome you to funland anymore.
Lol most of my trips were nothing like that. They can be intense and uncomfortable but they dont break me because I can actually handle the fear and anxiety...been doing it for years lol
>You are being put in touch with literal divinity with harder drugs
this spiritual hippie bullshit is the most annoying thing about psychedelics I swear
some people are so limited that any significant change in perception is taken to be divine in nature
you're literally just modulating your sensory processing, it is not in any way any deeper than that
ba-dum-tsh
interesting I've done similar but not this much. on probation I smoked DMT as a substitute for weed. If you become an alcoholic or opioid user I think it would probably help your mental issues. Or if you tried lions mane since that helps regrow neurons which may be an issue for you but who knows.
I will add that the "walking in a room and forgetting why" feeling is the main thing I saw lions mane mushroom help with because I used to have that very bad right after my period of tripping a lot so the change after taking it was very noticeable
>after my period
Please don't remind me there are women on my 4chins. Keep the disgusting fact that "i'm a girl btw" to yourself. Thank you.
I am also a woman. Female. Girl. With tits, menstrual periods, monthly ovulation, long hair, the whole bit. Just so you know. Get fucked, fag. By a man. With a dick. Because you are a homosexual ass gayboi.
Not the guy you're responding to, but shut the fuck up. Fucking attention where. Nobody here wants to read about your gash or its many malfunctions. Do not respond to this.
Shut the fuck up you lousy cunt. I am a woman, too, btw. We are legion.
Seeeeeeeetttthhhheeeeeeeeeee.
Seconding Lion's Mane, also look into other things that induce neurogenesis. Psychedelics have been shown to increase neurogenesis, which means your brain becomes more plastic and subject to change. This is likely what caused you're current state, long period of excessive brain malleability followed by solidification when you stopped the psychs. Unironically the way out of your situation is the same way you got in. Increase plasticity, do healthy things and then solidify to a healthy state. You could carefully try a short regimen of microdosing shrooms simply for the neurogenesis, but don't do doses over 300mg dried.
Right, yes you can buy these things in pill form so it's worth a shot. Don't know if it will actually work but why not try I guess.
ah yes, recommend the guy something that will fuck his brains up even more.
fuck you satan.
I would strongly discourage trying to fix the damage caused by psychedelics with more psychedelics. None of these things are harmless.
looks at these retards. someone comes in having experienced the same problem and mentions a mushroom used to treat dementia and these idiots say it's dangerous and a "psychedelic". if you can't accept help from someone telling you they had the same issue and fixed it then you deserve to stay like this lol
>be unga, get bungad
Should have stayed in the unga fren.
the second side effect you mention was something I wanted to happen when I was doing psychedelics. I'm glad it didn't, but I still have hppd and see patterns occasionally
Took a lot of LSD a few summers back and every now and then I get these physical sensations as if I am on psychedelics. They are faint, and this feeling tends to occur during a full moon. Other than that, I would say I don't really have any permanent side-effects that are noticable. If anything I've stopped wanting to chase the dragon. The first few times were profound and life-affirming. All other times were nowhere near as potent.
How close are you to a ley line?
pretty close, actually. i havent dont any research into leylines.
most obvious fedpost itt
>I would say I don't really have any permanent side-effects
>this feeling tends to occur during a full moon
If you think the moon has an effect on your hallucinations, you should probably add delusion to the list.
You do know on which board you are right?
why is nobody asking the fucking question
Did you learn anything special or mindblowing after that long of usage?
Yes of course, I have intrusive religious thoughts because my logical mind is trying to recapture and process the things which happened. I know that the events were in line with Advaita Vedanta, which is how I came to know about the existence of that religion/philosophy.
The memory is difficult to hold because the mind can only really hold onto tangible things, so I can remember "yellow cubes" but the more ineffable parts are impossible to hold long term I think.
You're talking in Redditisms, like "there's no bad trip just challenging trips bro" nonsense, from people who drop a couple tabs of acid and have the audacity to recommend people go vaporize 30mg of toad.
You are acting like an arrogant human and will be humbled if you keep gloating about how you are too strong for divinity to do what it wants to you. Go rip some Salvia bongs and see what happens when you give a powerful substance complete control over your mind. You won't even remember what fear or anxiety or bravery or a "you" is.
Even Mike Tyson got destroyed by divinity. No living being can overpower god.
So basically you gained nothing?
You can't gain anything in that sense, because it's not possible to hold onto what happens. It's only there in the present and then it's not. I have a number of positive benefits also, but I think I'm brain damaged so I don't know if it's worthwhile.
I don't feel FOMO about life as much because I don't think dying is really a real thing. That's a positive.
>I don't feel FOMO about life as much because I don't think dying is really a real thing
Ironically, since I came to know I will never stop existing in some form, I've become extremely nihilistic. I will have to strive to keep my experience bearable for the rest of eternity and I will never escape the risk of sinking into despair and suffering enormously. In an eternal existence, given enough time, we will all undergo extreme physical, mental and emotional pain and torture, as well as pleasure. That is NOT a positive. It is, in fact, the worst fate a sentient being can be ever subjected to.
If you are ready to stop experiencing then you can always return to nothingness. It has always been and always will be, your choice.
All drug addicts ever gain is the feeling of having gained something awesome and ineffable that has absolutely no application or relevance.
Sounds like he gave himself dementia and a bit of religious mania. tbh~~
nobody is asking because we all know that you don't learn anything on drugs except that drugs can be good fun
very neat.
I just get HPPD that comes back whenever I'm very tired or stressed. I need to try harder.
>I trip every time I wake up from sleep
get checked for sleep apnea
never took dmt or ayahuasca, but most people who take ayahuasca have no desire of using it again for a long time. Not because the experience was bad, but because they know they don't need it anymore. Idk maybe chemical DMT version is stripped of the plant's form spirituality, because it's not just about the compound, but also the plant's spirit. In ayahuasca brew there's also shitloads of other compounds besides DMT which help in one way or another. Imo the scientist's obsession to jam organic medicine into a pill (because you can't just sell or patent a plant) is a big problem with modern materialistic medicine.
Well that's how you feel first of all, convinced you could never possibly forget after seeing it, but after some months the experiences invariably fade. So after a while you're left with a memory that something really serious happened, unable to recall what it was that caused that apparent knowledge. At which point you can only really believe yourself on faith.
If you're a very skeptical type person, once the exact recall of the ineffable factors which caused apparent revelation dwindles, you begin to doubt yourself until you go again. After all, I SEEM completely 100% convinced that I encountered divinity and divine truths, but how can I be sure I wasn't just delusional with drugs? Guess I better check -> Oh fuck I was right, reality truly is fundamentally divine, I'm never touching that shit again I KNOW it now -> Into a neverending cycle of forgetting and re-checking yourself.
There's real grounds to question if it's even possible at all to know something that isn't in current direct experience. As outside of that, it's just memory recall.
This is my fear with psychedelics, even "weaker" ones like weed.
Everything is contained in sobriety; every person at their depth is constantly searching for meaning, what is the purpose of the world, what is real, what is good, and their place in these things. This question is perfectly potent in sobriety (though out of the pain of having this question unanswered people do almost anything to escape it and numb themselves). As the answer to these questions is love, that is selfless gift unto the other for their own sake, you cant find meaning in yourself but have to begin to give to the other (without emotional motivation, like pleasure or the like).
My fear is that psychedellics are terribly convincing false lights. They make you feel the sense of meaning that you get from genuine love for another, giving you the emotional sense of profoundness, meaning, beuty, etc. when in fact you have gained absolutely nothing.
>weed
Please off yourself
Why he's right. You're picture is also right.
You gotta go back to it. As youve said, all is contained within sobriety. Instead of viewing a drug experience like a "brick" added on top of sobriety that alters the overall experience of reality I try to view it as a "brick" taken off the stagnant slate of sobriety, restoring temporarly a certain quality of the true human experience. This way, a trip is more of a memorry projected backward than it is an experience of the unkwown awaiting to happen. This gives you time unto sobriety to go back and reach again for elements of your previous trip so that can come enrich your clean sober state.
I often dream I'm in love with people who don't exist in ways I have rarely been in real life. The few first hours of the day after such a dream I miss that person deeply.
Does that mean that person exists? No.
What you described is exactly the same. The only reason you "knew" reality is fundamentally divine is because you were on drugs. And yes, I have had that experience as well. Both on drugs and during meditation.
But it doesn't prove anything except that you had that experience. Not that any of it is objectively real.
>Not that any of it is objectively real.
you're taking the conclusion the opposite way. you should examine what you think is objectively real and see how there is no objective reality.
To be fair when taking psilocybin your brain tends to forget every sentence you make so the only thoughts that get strung out are either typed out or from the smart human juices in your brain managing to say something coherent
Can DMT cure my homosexuality?
Nothing but a bullet will do the tricks, sorry homosexual 🙁
Not true, your mom's gorilla pussy grip also cured my homosexuality
Btw could you please return my shirt
Thanks buddy
Try taking the wormpill first.
If that don't work, then move on to something more intense.
aargh
>from abusing LSD and DMT several times a week for over a year
so almost every day for over a year? Yeah dude there are usually natural barriers that prevent people from doing that. You might be lucky to be talking in complete sentences
I did something similar, maybe not as much but basically did DMT non-stop for a few weeks and had a psychotic episode. Didn't have any lasting effects but then I ended up doing the same thing again a year later and now I have constant auditory hallucinations (another voice in my head) and I wish I was dead.
How long has it been? After my last use I had constant flashbacks for a few weeks then periodically for a few months. Like serious night terrors where I had 8 arms like a Hindu God, screaming the house down. Obviously visual hallucinations are such a minor element of emotional responses or even "awakening" experiences, but it is creepy. I used to see Hindu stuff while tripping all the time, I didn't even know the mythos but saw the demon moustache people also... Heard others report similar, seeing deities they later find out are identical to very detailed descriptors of Hindu deities like Lakshmi and such.
That gives me hope. So maybe another 2 years and I will be fine.
>So maybe another 2 years and I will be fine.
You can't put a time frame on these things, it's not like a broken bone. If you are doing better now than a year ago, it's reasonable to think you could be doing better after another year. Just take care of yourself, and I would avoid drugs or even alcohol, eat well, get sleep, exercise, etc.
It's been 3 years, I don't feel like it's gotten any better.
My psychotic episodes were just dumb, I didn't have any kind of religious awakening. I hallucinated an anime GF and believed I could communicate across parallel universes.
that would be for the best, crazy people are never respectful
>I hallucinated an anime GF and believed I could communicate across parallel universes
Based. And, unironically, you might've been communicating across parallel universes for real.
But if you can't function normally with that, it's better that you don't attach to it.
What is the voice in your head sound like? What does it say?
>another voice in my head
You weakened your aura to the point that an entity slipped in. You need an entity clearing and to repair that shit before you go full schizo. Find a faith you can vibe with and pray to God. Then look for someone who can take that being out of you.
>1) Severe memory issues.
In fact, I have noticed that the "Mandela effect" is often reported by those who use hallucinogens.
glow harder cunt
I'm not a fed. I'm
. I'm extremely fascinated by the people highest on Openness, which I realized a while ago aren't artists, and not even poets, but schizos, especially of the esoteric/occultist sort. OP seems to have become an extremely high Openness people or is tapping into The Source and I would appreciate cultivating a long-term friendship with such a person, as it would be interesting to explore and discuss what they call "bizarre intrusive esoteric thoughts" or let them interpret and give their input on mine.
ok well i appreciate it but it's not worth the risk. feel free to ask something here try tho
Okay, we can use another platform. I heard about a particular decentralized sort of app outside the fediverse I can try to dig it up if you're willing to use that...
also I made
and
so I'd appreciate your response to that here
oh also this https://archive.4plebs.org/x/thread/35685993
but on the spot a bit more complicated, I can try to associate to something said in thread or it just becomes an automatic revelation with time and living to me, not something I can invoke consciously
You're literally schizophrenic.
>1) Severe memory issues. You know when you open a tab to Google something and don't remember what it was? That happens 24/7 but with everything, including why I walked into a room, where I was going when I start driving, list goes on. I lose my phone every day. Encompasses every aspect of memory.
>2) I trip every time I wake up from sleep. If I slept deeply for some hours anyway (doesn't happen if I only slept lightly). I will be in a psychedelic state of mind for about half hour or more after waking.
>3) Bizarre intrusive esoteric thoughts literally every single day. I have religious thoughts far more often than I think about sex.
>4) Loss of libido.
bro just discovered drugs
never touch opiates or benzos
I think benzos are like Adderall in that they aren't very damaging to people who "need them" for real. I have anxiety disorder and took Xanax or Valium every single day for a longass time. Eventually I was hospitalized because I was also on tren (steroids). During my stay in hospital, the withdrawal was nowhere near as bad as it should have been for someone going cold turkey off of bars every day.
I have had serious anxiety disorder for most of my life and it runs in my family. Probably benzos just supplement my mind with something it's deficient in.
benzos helped me a lot of times too... but I want to remember my life so I took it once in a while if I have to party or smth...
Benzos have the worst withdrawals of all drugs. Would never touch that stuff.
Kratom could help you.
You should abuse mushrooms now OP for the neurogenesis gains
>am impacted for life in many ways from abusing LSD and DMT several times a week for over a year.
Never heart this from LSD before.
But if I would use it, then not any single week. Its like alcohol.
I went insane and became a jesus freak back when I started growing and messing around with ALBINO PENIS ENVY mushrooms, be careful
FUCK.
>3) Bizarre intrusive esoteric thoughts literally every single day. I have religious thoughts far more often than I think about sex.
elaborate please
nagger
dmt is bad
I'm autistic and one weird theory is autistic people have higher baseline DMT than average and your experiences sound pretty much like my daily life except tripping in the morning. Even that kinda happens if I fall back asleep and have a micro dream.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6370651/
This makes so much sense. Im autistic too anon and last I smoked DMT a couple of times in a row I didnt feel as much as the next person...
drugs r bad mmkoy
Except for number 1, I've experienced this the more I meditate.
Anyway. I know someone who takes mushrooms once or twice a month, and every time she explains how she hasn't had any "for a long time". She's grown less and less present over time and conversing with her is like trying to wrangle a retarded monkey on cocaine.
there is a bioweapon in 2 forms circulating that is extremely neurodegenerative. Most likely your memory issues come from that, start supplementing shit for brain health.
drugs cause brain damage? what?!
my best friend of 10 years killed himself after abusing psychedelics for a while. I remember it all started after taking penis envy mushrooms with him, we had previous experience with lsd and mushrooms before (never hero dosed or anything, just kinda doing it for fun). The trip we had on penis envy changed him forever, I recall myself crying from euphoria after witnessing “crystallized” and glowing blood (or energy) running all through my veins and arms. I started tearing up out of nowhere, I was frozen, I couldn’t move and it felt like my body was stuck to the ground and all I could do was move my head around, thats when I remember looking over to the side to see what was happening and I saw his face, he was wide eyed like one of those memes about the vietnam war veteran dogs who’ve seen stuff. I asked him what was going on and he told me that he saw a snake on the ground that was talking to him, whispering to him in a different language and that he would die soon. He lived in an innawoods typa area so we were tripping in his backyards full of trees and nature so there definitely was garden snakes of the sort around, I looked to see if there was a snake and there actually was, I scared it away but I have no idea how we was able to spot it around when it was so dark outside. After this trip, everything went back to normal as usual, but he became obsessed with psychedelics, microdosing lsd every day, taking hero doses on the weekend. I didn’t partake in any of this stuff because I felt like psych’s aren’t something to be abused and I was kind of a pussy about trips myself. He began synthesizing DMT with a drug dealer friend and this is when things went south, he began smoking DMT almost every week trying to “breakthrough”, but I swear he was just frying his brain, he began drawing scribbles of visions he would have, his appearance became more disgruntled as well as his demeanor almost in the way that you would see a scientist go from sane to mad.
Much like the OP, he would find esoteric or religious meaning in everything, but none of it made sense it was super weird and obscure stuff that seemed like a bunch of incoherent rambling about the government and his alter ego that supposedly was really God trying to talk to him in the form of a personality split, thats when I realized shit had gotten out of hand. I tried to talk to him several times but the man would just seem like he wasn’t there anymore, like the piece of him that I knew as my best friend was gone, I remember crying one night because I didn’t know how to help him, I tried getting him to go back to school, gym, work, so we could enjoy life’s pleasures but it was hard to get through to him. He wasn’t the person I knew anymore as my friend. The most disturbing thing came when he asked me to pick him up one night and he walked into the car with a swollen face almost as if he had gotten beat up and jumped by people, lips as swollen and red as cherries, forehead bumps and swelling all over on his cheeks his eyes everywhere, his face was so swollen he could barely see out of both eyes. He told us that his uncle that lives with him had been beekeeping at home, he said some of the bees had gotten out and stung him in the face by accident. I didn’t know whether to believe him or not. Shortly after this he cut all contact with me and everyone else and disappeared for a month, his mom called me to tell me he had committed suicide. They found him dead by some train tracks after shooting himself. At the funeral, the dad decided to show me some of the writings he found in his diary before he passed, in one excerpt it read , “today I walked into a beekeeping section of my house and let the bees sting my face repeatedly, I need to get all the toxins and pollutants out of my blood, it hurts like crazy but if I do this i’ll be able to open my third eye, i’m almost where I need to be I can feel it”.
There’s more crazy shit I found out about my friend from his dad after the funeral about the month where he completely ghosted everyone and went off the rails, it includes satanic rituals and meth use and a manic police chase that led to police looking for him in a swamp for about 1 day and a half. I can’t be bothered to write all of it here but if you have anyone wants to hear the rest just ask me. Other than that, please dont abuse psychedelics, they literally fry your brain to the point of no return, use it wisely and with caution, you don’t want to ruin your life and the life of the people that love you.
Poor guy, I hope you're doing alright anon. It must be so hard to lose a friend like that. I personally have always been too much of a pussy to try anything aside from weed. But I am curious about the police chase through the swamp.
Sorry for what you've been through bro. That seems like a weight to carry.
I appreciate that you've shared this story, it's certainly a lot to consider and think about.
1) i have the same problem
2) Never had this feeling
3) Thats just being schizo
4) Lol no im a wanker
Never done DMT though but other drugs
you are becoming closer with god as you drift away from the humanity, numbah 3 is god attempting to commune with you (he's really lonely).
>He's really lonely
Why he doesnt fuck his wife to pass time.?
idk, why don't i fuck my mother-wife to pass time? we all got issues here you know.
Are you incestuous ? Dont do this, it makes degenarative recurrence in the DNA babies
Bullshit. As someone who actually did psychedelics, the tolerance to their effects increases very rapidly. With that kind of use, your tolerance would be in space by the end of the first month. Who ate you trying to impress?
tell ur stories with machine elves anon, pls
Drugs are bad, mmmkay?
were you a heavy smoker prior? this shit burns my lungs so gd bad, hard to break through
do you drink? I quit drinking for 2 weeks and then went on a long, challenging hike (about 10 miles) and all my brain fog went away.
I think detoxing and then some strenuous physical activity can help clear the mind.
Hey op. I was reading this thought of your post. Glad to see it is still up. PQQ is a supplement that might be of interest to you. Brief summary in picrel. Hope it helps.
https://supplementpolice.com/health-supplements-review/
Just wanted to say for those here and elsewhere, I believe you can find happiness and joy. Others to connect with and help you can receive. Adventures to be had and dreams to follow. I hope for the best for those here, and elsewhere Please reconsider any suicidal thoughts.This message applies to others too.
I hope things get better for you. This message here applies to you as well.
did you travel in the astral realm?
If you're still smoking weed quit, It's prolonging those effects you mentioned. I did something similar in 2017-2020 and even though I quit most of it I kept smoking weed into early 2022 and I noticed a significant improvement in the side effects you mentioned. For me it wasn't so much psychedelic states immediately upon awakening so much as they just popped up randomly anytime I was feeling more emotional that usual. The sober hallucinations took about a year of not using DMT / shrooms / acid but still smoking weed to subside and the general mindset as well as auditory hallucinations ended about a month or two after I quit smoking weed.
It's likely a still have some permenant damage from my use and there are definitely times I miss being able to induce psychedelic states basically at will, as it takes a much more directed effort to get myself into that state now, but overall the symptoms will reduce the longer you go without using.
>still smoking weed to subside and the general mindset as well as auditory hallucinations ended about a month or two after I quit smoking weed
You smoked away your brain, you think you're going numb. Cocaine is on my lungs
I have been toking up on that weed and midazolam and melatonin. I get free lucid dreams every night.
NO COPYPASTA HERE FOLKS JUST VERY EXPENSIVE MEDICAL GRADE DRUGS
Done dmt hundreds of times without that experience. Folks with mental health issues shouldn’t play with psychs.
>several times a week for over a year
yeah I think your issues are too much money and too much free time
I wish I could afford to trip balls every day. I doubt I would, but then again, maybe I would. I like to think I'd work on my hobbies while only tripping occasionally.
Maybe that's what you need anon. A hobby, something generative.
could mainly be the acid. DMT lets you see the other side through a window, acid actually opens the door.
t. never taken DMT