I hate having curly hair so fucking much.

I hate having curly hair so fricking much. No matter how much effort I put into it I still look unkempt and I can't get a "female haircut"

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    What products do you use?

    • 1 year ago
      Rocktra_
      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        ......

        • 1 year ago
          Rocktra_

          What

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        How are you applying the gel and drying your hair? And how much are you using? Your hair looks gelled in that I can see where the structure of the ringlets but yeah they look crushed and fricked up. I suspect you aren't using nearly enough.

        You mentioned using leave in conditioner, are you talking about the detangler there?

        What are you doing with your hair while you sleep?

        What do you use to wet brush it in the shower? How often do you do that? And are you completely wet brushing it?

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >How are you applying the gel and drying your hair?
          I put it in after I put in all the shit and then I put on a hair cap, keep that on for 20 minutes and then scrunch it out
          >And how much are you using?
          Like a half-dollar sized
          >Your hair looks gelled in that I can see where the structure of the ringlets but yeah they look crushed and fricked up.
          (

          >female haircut
          this is clearly a female haircut, you look like a girl

          ) That isn't actually my hair (I haven't washed since monday so it looks abnormally fricked up) it just is what it looks like
          >You mentioned using leave in conditioner, are you talking about the detangler there?
          Yeah
          >What are you doing with your hair while you sleep?
          Nothing if I am washing in the morning
          >What do you use to wet brush it in the shower?
          tooth comb
          >How often do you do that? And are you completely wet brushing it?
          Everytime I shower, completely.

          >brushes are bad for curly hair
          u can brush while its wet in the shower
          i like to do it while i have conditioner in my hair so its smoother and not yanking on anything

          I do do that but you don't use a bristle brush for that

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >keep that on for 20 minutes and then scrunch it out
            Like scrunching it out like right after 20 minutes of plopping? How? You need to let it dry.
            >Nothing if I am washing in the morning
            ;-;
            This is probably your problem. The friction from your head and the pillow case is probably rubbing the oils out of your hair and damaging it. Especially if it's as long as the pic you showed. Even if you're conditioning it daily you need to either be wearing a satin cap or at least tying it up. Plus you can get multiple days out of a wash if you properly take care of your hair at night.

            Also, I cannot stress this enough, you *need* to go to a stylist. Frick go to a barber if you're too scared. You probably have a lot of damaged hair that needs to be trimmed if it's this frizzy all the time. That's just the bare minimum. If you get it properly styled and layered it will make your curls look better, it'll fit your face better, you'll get good recommendations for products and routine changes.

            I cannot stress this enough. You fricking need to do this if you want your hair to escape the "early 20s burnout in a band" look. Find someone who will cut it dry and can properly layer it.

            This tool for people who are devacut certified is a good start. I know it's scary but there's no way around this part.

            https://www.devacurl.com/finder

          • 1 year ago
            Rocktra_

            >Like scrunching it out like right after 20 minutes of plopping? How? You need to let it dry.
            Its damp but still drier.
            >The friction from your head and the pillow case is probably rubbing the oils out of your hair and damaging it. Especially if it's as long as the pic you showed. Even if you're conditioning it daily you need to either be wearing a satin cap or at least tying it up. Plus you can get multiple days out of a wash if you properly take care of your hair at night.
            I hear you but it gets that way anyway during the day, it gets dry and frizzy 2 hours after I wash it. Imma buy a heat protectant and see if that fixes that but idk.
            >Frick go to a barber if you're too scared.
            I did go to a barber and they completely ruined my hair and its so fricking ugly now.

            >I'd probably rip my scalp off
            again, brush type is super important. 99 percent of brushes would rip my scalp off too. the bristle brush i use, though, is perfect. no tugging at all really.

            its difficult to comb my hair when its wet, I don't think you have as curly hair as me

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >its difficult to comb my hair when its wet, I don't think you have as curly hair as me
            Bristle brushes are like specifically for curly hair. people with hair even curlier than yours use them. As for combs, i have literally never been able to use a comb without ripping hair out. I can go about an inch with them and it hits a snag

          • 1 year ago
            Rocktra_

            They make it more frizzy. I've used bristle brushes before, they just destroy the curls.

            Just give up and wear a wig at that point
            Swiftiehon wears a wig and it looks better than 90% of the trans girls on this board including the passoids

            I don't want to wear a wig

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >They make it more frizzy. I've used bristle brushes before, they just destroy the curls.
            oh weird. when i do it, its frizzy and straight but the curls are back as soon as my hair dries.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >I did go to a barber and they completely ruined my hair
            Was it a barber that specialized in curly hair?
            You need to find a stylist that knows how to take care of curly hair. Most don't. Ask them. Like I'm not trying to negotate with you about something here. If you want your hair to look good you need to do this. What you do with that info is up to you.

            "scrunching" comes from the phrase "scrunch out the crunch" the crunch is the gel after it's completely dried (or as close to it as you can possibly get). If you're scrunching gelled damp hair you're just fricking up the curl pattern and creating undefined frizz. Either let it air dry or invest in a hair dryer with diffuser.
            >gets that way anyway during the day
            Yeah because your hair is damaged. The healthier it is the longer your curls will hold shape during the day.

          • 1 year ago
            Rocktra_

            >You need to find a stylist that knows how to take care of curly hair. Most don't. Ask them. Like I'm not trying to negotate with you about something here. If you want your hair to look good you need to do this. What you do with that info is up to you.
            I am not disagreeing with you, its just the circumstance i'm in
            >"scrunching" comes from the phrase "scrunch out the crunch" the crunch is the gel after it's completely dried (or as close to it as you can possibly get). If you're scrunching gelled damp hair you're just fricking up the curl pattern and creating undefined frizz. Either let it air dry or invest in a hair dryer with diffuser.
            That is helpful thanks

            none of you know how to care for curly hair. search up the curly girl method and get to work ladies!

            I have done that

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Also are these the only products you've incorporated into a routine? Or have you cycled through a few with basically the same results?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        lmao you fell for the curly girl meme too?
        Moroccanoil is expensive, but is the only thing that actually hydrates my hair. Give it a shot.

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    you need leave in conditioner and a bristle brush

    • 1 year ago
      Rocktra_

      I do use leave in conditioner and brushes are bad for curly hair

      i had a similar problem. btw i have very similar hair as yours. only wet your hair when you're gonna wash it. two hours before you wash put coconut oil into your hair while its DRY. two hours later get in the shower and wash it out with shampoo and use conditioner. do this twice a week but otherwise dont wet your hair. brush and trim regularly. also like start going to a salon.

      > two hours before you wash put coconut oil into your hair while its DRY
      I don't have time to do that I have to wash in the morning
      >also like start going to a salon.
      Can't do that

      Curly hair rocks yours is just too dry

      It gets dry not matter what I do

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >brushes are bad for curly hair
        u can brush while its wet in the shower
        i like to do it while i have conditioner in my hair so its smoother and not yanking on anything

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        the right brush is great for curly hair.
        the trick is to only do it before a shower while your hair is dry, on the days that you condition.

        • 1 year ago
          Rocktra_

          >do it before a shower while your hair is dry,
          I don't think its possible to do it while its dry, I'd probably rip my scalp off

          just go to a saloon get your hair made and get the lady to recommend u products, do it fast pls right now u have the twitter troony look

          I'm not out I'm not gonna go to a saloon

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >I'd probably rip my scalp off
            again, brush type is super important. 99 percent of brushes would rip my scalp off too. the bristle brush i use, though, is perfect. no tugging at all really.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >the trick is to only do it before a shower while your hair is dry
          If it works for you that's great, but this is incredibly weird advice. OP you probably don't need to do this.

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    i had a similar problem. btw i have very similar hair as yours. only wet your hair when you're gonna wash it. two hours before you wash put coconut oil into your hair while its DRY. two hours later get in the shower and wash it out with shampoo and use conditioner. do this twice a week but otherwise dont wet your hair. brush and trim regularly. also like start going to a salon.

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Curly hair rocks yours is just too dry

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >female haircut
    this is clearly a female haircut, you look like a girl

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    just go to a saloon get your hair made and get the lady to recommend u products, do it fast pls right now u have the twitter troony look

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Looks like a guy metalhead hair

    • 1 year ago
      Rocktra_

      Again this isn't actually my hair but exactly what it looks like

      I get rockstar and hippie sometimes

      That looks like a israeli woman's haircut to me, take care of it and you could look like Elaine from Seinfeld or something idk

      She's so fricking goals

      Another man with long hair thinks he's a woman? Boring.

      If I was a real woman would I have short hair?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Why don’t you just post an actual pic of your hair?
        >but it’s fricked up right now
        Seeing it at its worst will help give us advice on how to prevent it from looking like that

        • 1 year ago
          Rocktra_

          It isn't representative of when I actually take care of my hair so the advice would be more basic than I need

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    That looks like a israeli woman's haircut to me, take care of it and you could look like Elaine from Seinfeld or something idk

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Another man with long hair thinks he's a woman? Boring.

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Just give up and wear a wig at that point
    Swiftiehon wears a wig and it looks better than 90% of the trans girls on this board including the passoids

    • 1 year ago
      swiftie

      wigs are really fun tbh
      if i were to transition i think id shave my hair and just pick a wig to use all the time and keep switching between them

  11. 1 year ago
    Radiochan

    It's a blessing and a curse
    t. Fellow curlymoder

    • 1 year ago
      Rocktra_

      having fluffy hair can help my head size but besides that it looks shit

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    none of you know how to care for curly hair. search up the curly girl method and get to work ladies!

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    There's a lot of info in here already and idk if someone said it, but for your sleep situation:
    You would probably benefit from a mulberry silk bonnet or pillowcase, both if you want. Mulberry silk is really good, but a cheap, slippery satin will do just fine. The idea is to reduce friction on your hair while you sleep

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Wait someone already said it ignore me

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    learn to use a hair straightening iron you n00b

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      even with heat protectants, using a straightening iron will eventually damage your curly hair beyond repair, at which point the hairs are considered "dead". sure, you can just keep straightening it, but if you ever want to go natural again you will have to start over completely.
      either way the straightening meme can be ass too since the super straight sleek look doesn't look great on male skulls and you can't really go halfway when straightening curly hair, it's all or nothing

      • 1 year ago
        celly

        She could go to a salon and hey Japanese hair straightening

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          left looks better. i'm not as anti straightening as every other curly girls seems to be though. busting out a new look now and then is really fun

          Straightening your curls is a crime and should be punished most severely

          • 1 year ago
            celly

            I'm not demonizing curls but she clearly is not happy with them

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      left looks better. i'm not as anti straightening as every other curly girls seems to be though. busting out a new look now and then is really fun

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    If your hair looks like the pic in OP it's very similar to mine. I have good days and bad days and am not femme presenting yet, but do mess around with hairstyles at home and with a friend

    Honestly even if you just do nothing, just put it up in a messy pineapple bun. Looks super fem and will basically always look good it is so fool proof. You might need a hair clip or two to get good coverage. Leave a few loose strands to frame your face. This is my fav style like x1000 since discovering how good it looks with messy curls. You can literally do nothing and pull this off is so good for if you want to be lazy

    Also put your hair in a loose pinapple when you sleep so it doesn't crush your curls as much, will reduce breakage etc. stops you getting that "flat" look.
    Always use a silk/satin scrunchie or similar. Also get yourself a silk/satin pillowcase too

    But yeah, Curly Girl now.
    I use mostly Australian product so can't recommend much but there is so much choice if you're in the US etc.
    It will take a lot of trial and error to get things right. Don't change too often, spend at least a few weeks with a regime to let your hair adjust.

    Do you plop? If not start right now. Never dry with a towel etc. again. If you don't know what plopping is look it up, "CG plop". Basically drying slowly in a cotton towel.
    Do not brush your hair. Never. Don't comb, don't brush. Loosely detangle with your fingers while conditioning.
    I basically never shampoo, just cowash. I use a silicone scalp brush to help clean the scalp/roots and (in theory) promote hair growth. I get seb derm and this helps clear it up.
    Find a good CG friendly leave in and styling gel that gives you a good cast, then scrunch out when it dries. I usually get away with only gelling every 2 days so long as nothing messes it up too much.

    Loads more too, but everything is kinda personal and ymmv etc.
    If you questions ask I'll try and get back and answer but there is sooo much info out there

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      can u tell me what aussie products you use cause none of the shit i ever see rec'd online is sold here
      i do basically the same routine as you except i detangle with a denman brush in the shower, but it seems hard to find a good curl cream, deep conditioner and leave-in here

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        There is an awesome little webstore based in Brissy that sell mostly only CG products and keeps a well curated range. This Little Curl. Kaycee is a legend. She has so much good stuff to try and pretty much always lists if things are CG approved or what exceptions and stuff. Lifesaver.

        I use a lot of "Clever Curl" product, made here in Qld. Recently switch to their stuff and really liking it. They have a salon where they will do a consult and recommend you product and methods from their range I wanna go there sometime but it's pretty expensive and I'm hella nervous haha.

    • 1 year ago
      bartender

      this is good advice
      curly hair isn't that hard it's just different and if you try do to it what straight bair people do then it messes it up

      l personally don't use silk pillows though bc they're not breathable

  16. 1 year ago
    lady legs

    it really does suck ass
    i put months into finally getting it to not look like shit but it's still so difficult to maintain and my haircut options are limited since i still present male
    but seriously, literally anything and everything fricks up curly hair and it's awful. sure it looks nice now that i've figured out a routine but jfc i wish i just had straight hair like my sisters. straight hair is living on easy mode

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    how long before you show your face rocktra?

  18. 1 year ago
    Vieo

    Don't mind me.

    Just passing through.

  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    It's not your curly hair that makes you a hon. its your male socialization and male grooming that led you to have long stoner/homeless hobo hair.

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Dark and Lovely No-Lye Relaxer Kit. The super, not the regular. You're welcome.

  21. 1 year ago
    annie hardy

    do you wear a hair cap to sleep and around the house?

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >tfw every single time i post a pic some straight haired dipshit goes "wow you look so unkempt you need a haircut/brush your hair/etc"

    they will never know our struggle
    IE: all the morons in this thread talking about "just brush it XD"

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