LULZ / Misc

I convinced a black supremacist group that twerking is martial arts

I convinced black people that twerking is a form of Defense!

>be me

>Live in Philadelphia

>Group of black activists occupy South Street

>Stereotypical dindus. Screaming about "White privilege" "Racist cops" "Black Egyptians" "SJW shit" the works.

>I leave a sandwich shop and see them yelling shit at whites (and other blacks) that move their day to day life.

>They look like they drink the coolaid easily, and the women are dressed trashy.

>I sip my drink, waiting for them to willingly say who they are.

>Turns out it's some shitty Yakub group that congregates on reddit and facebook.

>Itbegins.jpg

>I make a sockpuppet account that night, use a phony skype number, and modify an image of an already existing dindu to bypass facial recognition on facebook.

>Ask to join. They got, like, 35 members or so.

>I join the group, and subtly bring up Twerking three hours later.

>"Obviously, twerking is a form of martial arts."

> A large amount of members are confused, a few are curious.

> These black supremacist groups are so egotistical and self centered, they bit down instantly.

>"Our black bodies are so beautiful and powerful, that when we show our sexuality, we channel our inner chakra. The more aggressive we twerk, the more powerful we get. We drive off the white demons with our beauty. The devil hates displays of divine perfection."

>The entire group is debating about this as I go to sleep.

  1. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Go to my favorite sandwich shop the next day.
    >Yakub group has police called on them for domestic disturbances.
    >"MUHFUGGA WHITE DEVIL HOOBA BOOBA, SHEEIT" the leader yells or some shit.
    >The women pull their fucking pants down and point their asses at the Police officer.
    > Police officer sighs as a good 2/3 of this group pull down their pants and twerk at him.
    >I start to chuckle... I couldn't believe what I was seeing.
    >Black women are twerking, clapping their ass at the police officer.
    >Men are trying to twerk, only a few do so.
    >Cop approaches them "Listen, we've had several complai-"
    >Twerking intensifies. Speed increases. Hollow clapping sounds echoing the street.
    >I am on the ground at this point.
    >Cop sighs and calls for backup.
    >Several police officers show up to be greeted by a symphony of ass claps.
    >All the asses are aimed at them, clapping, moving like jello.
    >Cops wrestle a few to the ground before handcuffing them.
    > Dindus realize the Defensive Twerking isn't working.
    >Some are trying very hard. Never before have I seen ass cheeks move so quickly.
    >One of the more advanced twerkers gets tased in the ass cheeks.
    >I am starting to black out from laughing. I need to breathe.
    >Some are arrested, others disperse.
    >Time passes.
    >Group is disbanded on facebook and reddit, and I am mass-flagged.
    >I still laugh myself into a dizzy state when I remember a woman bent over twerking at a cop, and starting to twerk faster as he gets closer.

    • 9 months ago
      Anonymous

      Thanks for sending my sides to orbit, mate. This is probably fake, but I've heard of some strange shit come out of philly and I needed the laugh.

    • 9 months ago
      Anonymous

      [deleted post]

      I hope this actually happend, it's believable.

  2. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    i approve. good work.
    >t.black

    • 9 months ago
      Anonymous

      thank you sir! But to be honest, it wasn't too hard. Feed them some bullshit about how divine and perfect black people are, throw in some new age shit, and they'll believe it.

      • 9 months ago
        Anonymous

        like you i wait for the day when my brothers wake up. its hard to reconcile the extreme self obsession of my race until you see that they have simply fallen prey to evil demonic/leftist trickery like many whites have. our simplicity and loyalty has been used against, us whereas your decency and generosity have been exploited. it might sound like an impossibility but the day you redpill the blacks is the day you win.

        • 9 months ago
          Anonymous

          Blacks are waking up. Believe it or not, the anti cop BLM SJWs are a dramatic minority of black people, and are almost collectively disdained among blacks.

          • 9 months ago
            Anonymous

            yes, and you would be surprised how many are one frame of mind away from your views. we are embarrassed by how they portray us like a corporate product, many of us know this is not the America we grew up with. you might not consider this but the fact that so many grandparents are a direct part of the black households is a hidden strength in that regard. many times i have seen someone spouting whatever leftist nonsense at home and then that one subtle look from grandma is like all the fires of hell. stand up to us as a friend and not for us as an ally, and you will gain a lifelong bond. you will have to say: "that damn n-word wants me to go fishing again, i'm never going to get anything done." but inside you will laugh and know it is good.

            • 9 months ago
              Anonymous

              Check'd

              And you're right. Those that have a frame of mind to not align themselves with people that condemn being successful as "Too White" are good folks. I know that the black old timers are typically much more moral and understanding. This BS is the result of praising gang violence, condemning police, focusing on women and possessions.

              A black person that doesn't buy into the BS is doing more for their community than those... things.

  3. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    I want to believe but it sounds too fantastical.

  4. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    I am sufficiently entertained, ty anon.

  5. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'm not exactly sure what you wanted to accomplish here OP, but I will not try and stop you.

    • 9 months ago
      Anonymous

      lulz, my good sir. Good old fashioned lulz.

  6. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    It is for women. They declare the availability of sexual congress to aggressive males. Same way serial killers get love letters.

  7. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    Fake and gay

  8. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    More like smiles in low IQ wiggerian

  9. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    Sounds like fiction but it's still funny. Why didn't you record it? Or screenshot your FB posts??

    Anyways, I can totally believe that black people will believe anything that appeals to their ego, so why don't we show them how based it is to fight the gnomish powers that be?

  10. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    It kinda pathetic. China used the same tactic and convince n-words to burn the whole Western while you just make them twerk.

    • 9 months ago
      Anonymous

      Okay glowstick.

  11. 9 months ago
    Anonymous

    screenshots or it didnt happen. either way funny story, i kek'd

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