How do you get over the fact that your ex girlfriend is fucking other men?

I stalk her on snapmap daily and every time I see her at a bar and then at a hotel or b&b, it feels like a dagger going straight through my heart. Like I want to barge in there and kill both of them (but obviously I would never do that).

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  1. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'm sure you don't get over it by cyber-stalking her, for one. Do yourself a solid and stop putting yourself through needless misery. Delete her from all forms of contact, block the accounts, delete your own accounts, and put your feelings into action. You need to have zero time to obsess about her life by living your own, fill your time. Hit the gym, hang with friends if you have any, work overtime, and find a reason to be happy without her. It takes time, so give it time. Then move the hell on.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      It's an obsession. With the last girl who I went on one date with, I spent 3 years obsessively stalking her. I'd also walk around outside for hours just so I would bump into her.

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        Man you got problems you don't need a woman you need therapy and a priest.

        • 10 months ago
          Anonymous

          what problems? i'm just lonely, which yeah I guess it is a problem.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I spent 3 years obsessively stalking her. I'd also walk around outside for hours just so I would bump into her.
            Im not the same person you were talking to, but this is a very big problem. That isn't just being lonely, that is a problem.
            You let your feelings take you to places that cause you damage.You need to stop sometimes, and let your thinking dominate your feelings. Your thinking is smarter than your feelings.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            By stalking her I mean I would check her social media multiple times a day to see where she's at and then i'd go to those places so I can see her. Not sure if that counts as stalking.

            I finally forgot about her and now this girl came along. She was never really my girlfriend, we just went on a few dates.
            But i'm feeling the exact same feelings I did back then, maybe even stronger. Whenever I see she's around, I often drop whatever i'm doing just so I can go there and see her even if she doesn't see me.

            I don't know really why i'm like this. I get really angry when someone isn't a part of my life anymore.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            >By stalking her I mean I would check her social media multiple times a day to see where she's at and then i'd go to those places so I can see her. Not sure if that counts as stalking.
            That is stalking and is insanely creepy

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            >By stalking her I mean I would check her social media multiple times a day to see where she's at and then i'd go to those places so I can see her. Not sure if that counts as stalking.
            This shit is terrifying. Get help

        • 10 months ago
          Anonymous

          prob go to therapy then. if you cant stop being obsessed on ur own, hopefully a professional can help

          Don't do this, therapists will try and brainwash you and make you worse or put you on drugs that remove your ability to produce internal monologue.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            I just want the pain to end

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        prob go to therapy then. if you cant stop being obsessed on ur own, hopefully a professional can help

        • 10 months ago
          Anonymous

          and say what? I obsess over girls and get angry when they have sex with other men?

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            yes, pretty much
            do you think your therapists expects you to come in like "oh I have actually no problems I'm completely normal haha"

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            is this an actual problem though? Pretty sure other men get jealous too.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            but you said you were stalking your ex for 3 years anon
            that's way past jealousy, that's what you said before, obsession
            and obsession is a big problem, it can completely ruin your life
            what if one day you can't handle it anymore and you go to the hotel your ex is with a knife and you kill them both?
            you go to prison and your life is ruined
            and don't think for one second "oh I would never do something like that"
            one bad moment and it's all over for you

            honestly what

            this happens to almost everyone. Me included. It's hard but true, happens to females too. When people break up it really hurts to imagine them fricking other people like they used to frick you. I personally got over it by realizing that this has been happening since the beginning of time. I am not special in my little jealousy compared to the thousands of years and billions of couples who have been through the same feelings. It is very obviously a weird part of life. But it is a part of life we all go through, so maybe it isn't that weird.
            Maybe the job is to get through it and accept yourself and move on, instead of cursing yourself to the past.

            said is a big thing that can help you a lot
            from what I understand, you have a big problem with accepting your feelings, in this case, jealousy
            as the anon above said, it's completely normal to feel jealousy and everyone would feel the same in your position
            but the difference here is that you can't handle this feeling, you can't process it correctly because you haven't learned to do that
            other people have and that's why after a while this feeling starts fading away for them and they can continue with their life
            you on the other hand, don't know what to do with this feeling, which by the way is actually a really powerful one for everyone
            so what happens next? well since you can't handle jealousy, it becomes the center of your life, the biggest thing in your life
            needless to say that will cause a lot of other problems that will make things only worse for you

            that's why I think talking with a therapist is the best thing you can do
            no pills, alcohol, drugs or anything like that
            those will make everything so much more complicated
            just talking with a professional so he can help you start accepting your feelings, to help you understand how normal it is to feel those things that you do
            it will take time, so you will need to be patient
            also don't expect just one hour a week will be enough
            you need to constantly do therapy by yourself, in your head
            a therapist can only be your guide, nothing more

            I wish you luck anon

  2. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    this happens to almost everyone. Me included. It's hard but true, happens to females too. When people break up it really hurts to imagine them fricking other people like they used to frick you. I personally got over it by realizing that this has been happening since the beginning of time. I am not special in my little jealousy compared to the thousands of years and billions of couples who have been through the same feelings. It is very obviously a weird part of life. But it is a part of life we all go through, so maybe it isn't that weird.
    Maybe the job is to get through it and accept yourself and move on, instead of cursing yourself to the past.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Thanks, anon. That is actually somewhat helpful.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      I feel like I'd get more annoyed thinking if my ex was more open to exploring with someone else. My sex like with my ex was pretty vanilla. Was just basic sex.

      I've actually met someone that is the total opposite to her (more experienced) and she's pretty much exactly what I want within my sex life. Then I don't even think of my ex because how amazing other women can be.

  3. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    maybe you wouldn't do that but someone else ^.^

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      are you willing to do me a favour?

  4. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    The best way to get over someone is to get on top of someone else. Go fricking other people and live a productive life, in a years time you look back and realize how stupid you are.
    Also most people frick up their lives up willingly, so if you focus on getting your shit in order there is a high chance she'll be worse off. Then you'll really see that breaking up was a blessing and not a mistake, it's happened to me like 3 time

  5. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    https://archive.4plebs.org/adv/thread/28909494/#28909540

  6. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Delete and block. Out of sight, out of mind.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      That wouldn't work for me

  7. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    You too frick other men.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      lmao

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        Yes

  8. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >How do you get over the fact that your ex girlfriend is fricking other men?
    I literally have no reason to care, I had no reason to start caring then and I have no reason to start caring now.
    So I solve this problem by being completely unaffected by it.
    > it feels like a dagger going straight through my heart
    I seriously don't understand why you homosexuals stay emotionally attached to people who aren't benefiting you.

  9. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    hot, i wish my ex still obsessed and stalked me like this

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Are you a woman (male)?

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        woman. I too stalk my ex online but that's the most i can do. i admire OP for his tenacity though, i kinda wish my exes would do the same to me. there would be fireworks, imagine that two stalkers stalking each other hilarious

        • 10 months ago
          Anonymous

          Serious question. How does a woman end up on a website for only thr most degenerate and useless men? What went wrong? You play the game of life on tutorial mode.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            in my case, my ex introduced me to this website and i haven't been able to leave this place ever since then. this site is a black hole for both men and women, men are just more vocal. as much as they larp as women, women also larp as men around here, it's a big entertaining soup of degeneracy and sadness

        • 10 months ago
          Anonymous

          'tutorial mode' is an overstatement btw. both genders have it easier than the other in some aspects

          as an example, there's the misconception that if you can easily get sex and fake validation (for sex) that equals fulfilment and happiness. but that's just because sex is such an important need for men even when in a relationship, but women put more emphasis on other things that are as hard to attain for them as sex seems to be for men

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            Cope. It's men who are the real romantics. If you give a woman more than a few "icks", she'll leave your ass. That includes shit like not having enough insta followers. Same way if you show emotion.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            >but women put more emphasis on other things that are as hard to attain for them as sex seems to be for men
            Like what? lol

            I don't even think sex is hard to get as a man, but it is infinitely easier as a woman, of course

  10. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    My ex is incapable of satisfying a man.

  11. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    >I stalk her
    Start with not doing this anymore. Stop letting her live in your head on your dime.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yes

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        No

  12. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    hmmm, when I see or hear of my ex hooking up with some girl I feel bad for the girl. She probably had high expectations......and then the letdown

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      ywnbaw

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        I'm not a homosexual or pervert. Just making lite of how disappointing a lover my ex was. If I thought he was awesome I would likely be jealous when he had another girl but that guy is hopeless

  13. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    .

  14. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    .

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