How do I connect with my Higher Power?

I'm jealous of spiritual/religious people.

I used to be into chaos magick. I used to believe. I have my fair share of experience with synchronicities and the like.

But now? Cynicism and nihilism. My altar is no more an altar; just a collection of cool-looking items. I feel alone. I'm having trouble staying away from substances, because only those make me feel alive. Or they numb me and I dont have to think.

How do you do it, anons? I need help. Not with substances, I have it under control for now. But how do I believe in something again?

I have no purpose, no drive, no appetite for life. Ideally, id frick off to a mountain and smoke my life away. But deep down I know this would be a waste; the easy way out.

Day in, day out; I only consoom. I should be studying for my degree. I should be working out. I should be investing more time in the only thing close to a 'dream', my youtube channel. But nope. Not for now. Not for the past years.

Any tips? Thank you for reading.

PS: For the sake of the old times, I can pull a tarot card for ya, if you request it.

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    For me it's come from, in no small part, struggle. Experience gained from struggle. And choosing to turn these experiences into knowledge and wisdom to further my own self growth. I'm not saying suffering is good, far from it, but ideally one can learn from it. These last few years have awakened something in me and I value my life far more than ever before, the potential of the future, and a care for the world around me. This is just the tip of the iceberg for me; I've felt called to entities and deities and I answered, in turn they have answered me. It isn't an easy path, but having a light inside of you changes everything.
    >PS: For the sake of the old times, I can pull a tarot card for ya, if you request it.
    Pull one for me, OP. I wish you good luck.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      What you said made sense, thanks. Maybe I have to keep pushing, or perhaps push harder even. Maybe I will learn from it too; because what I described is basically a form of suffering of my spirit.

      The Ace of Swords for ya my friend. Keep at it.

      Going through a similar thing. I experienced a haunting recently and now my belief in magick is at an all time low. I tried everything I could to banish them and nothing seems to work. Any other unrelated magick I've tried has garnered no results either. At least I *know* that supernatural entities exist, but now I just wish I could get them to frick off.

      Hmm, you see, I experienced a haunting too in 2020. I'm still not over it. But it had its good moments too, yknow? I wasn't afraid, so I went on with it. Maybe be less afraid? Try to control and direct your thoughts, you still are the captain of your ship. I'll pull a card for ya too even if you didn't ask for it, just for 'fun'.

      But you know what? On one hand you believe in supernatural entities, on the other your belief on magick is at an all time low. Isn't it a bit contradictory? Dont let your light inside you, as the other commentor said, diminish.

      The card is 'Justice'. good luck mate.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >On one hand you believe in supernatural entities, on the other your belief on magick is at an all time low. Isn't it a bit contradictory?
        You could say that, and perhaps I'm just a terrible magician after all, but I guess what I mean is that I lack belief in low magick. High magick is another thing all together. I still believe it's possible to achieve results by petitioning supernatural entities who have a Sims like control over the physical realm.
        >Justice
        You have no idea how much that applies to my present situation. Thanks.

        Since you asked how you can connect with your higher power, I decided to ask your spirit guides what they want you to know.
        >The Lovers, Seven of Pentacles, Two of Pentacles reversed
        Make the choice focus on one or two things that can lead to your self-development over the long-term, and don't spread yourself too thin. You mentioned studying or working out, that's a good place to start. If you manage to stick with something long enough to see the results you can achieve more balance and unity in your life. Your connection to the divine will strengthen as well. Hope this helps.

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Going through a similar thing. I experienced a haunting recently and now my belief in magick is at an all time low. I tried everything I could to banish them and nothing seems to work. Any other unrelated magick I've tried has garnered no results either. At least I *know* that supernatural entities exist, but now I just wish I could get them to frick off.

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >spiritual/religious
    They aren't occultists.

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >Ideally, id frick off to a mountain and smoke my life away. But deep down I know this would be a waste; the easy way out.
    if that's what's ya want, do it dummy

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Well, I also wanna do cocaine again, but I know it would be 'wrong', yknow? I'd rather find a purpose and avoid substances. The thing is, theres a conflict inside me, so sometimes I have to filter out my thoughts.

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Honestly man? We all get one life. And what's brought me to believe in these things is the ineffable truth that we all exist as quiet, immutable observers of the physical reality.

    The world tries to draw you into itself so that less of your energy is fed into you and more energy is fed into it. Be successful. Do the things that make you successful -in our world-. It's bullshit. Your thoughts are all you truly have as yours in this world, and you have the capability for greatness already within you.

    I hope this helps.

    You can pull one for me.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Wise words. I'll keep them in mind. Thank you.

      The Sun!

      I like how every card I drew so far somehow corresponds with the comments.

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    never give up! so what ya fell on your face. Try making your goals more achievable in a timeframe thats doable for you. Hell, make the task so fricking easy yet different than your routine. You will find the strength to break your loop brother, god speed.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Thank you for your words, really. 🙂

      Knight of Cups, hehe. I feel more energized after this post already, kinda cathartic to talk to strangers.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Sun here. That's good. People -do- care, as much as we live in this vast world full of all manner of bullshit going on in the world. Person to person, even total strangers can empathize with one another.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          You brought tears in my eyes, hah.. Some people do care, yes. Not all! The apathy of our world is unbearable for me at times. Guess I'll grow stronger.

          You sound like you're half way to being a saint or prophet. I guess you need to truly sacrifice yourself to something greater.

          Knight of Cups for you too. I'm nobody man!

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >But how do I believe in something again?
    You cannot choose what to believe in, for the belief is the undesputable truth for you.
    >But deep down I know this would be a waste;
    It seems that your "deep" lost connections and ties with "surface", for the flame is still burning in your heart. EerieWeb cannot fix it. Welcome to occultic equivalent of midlife crisis, I guess. A midway crisis?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The Tower. Another fitting card.

      Thank you for your words. You and everyone who posted. I'm off to bed. Take care brothers and sisters, this was a very inspiring thing for me, again, I thank you.

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    You sound like you're half way to being a saint or prophet. I guess you need to truly sacrifice yourself to something greater.

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