How did you guys get used to being alone?
or are you finding ways to cope about it?
How did you guys get used to being alone? or are you finding ways to cope about it?
How did you guys get used to being alone?
or are you finding ways to cope about it?
Escapism
Writingabout how horrible humans normalfags are
Rereading old books
It's like those kids born without pain receptors so they bite their own lips off. You won't feel pain no matter how alone you are, but it will slowly destroy you in many ways.
this is now loner general
i just want a hug from someone i can trust
Same. I've been fantasizing about being hugged pretty much constantly for days now. I want to be comforted, and I want to feel accepted. I don't want to feel like I'm repulsive. It's been so long bros
Anon, no matter who you are, I'd give you a hug if I could
Thanks
>spirituality
>creativity
>and hobbies!
We are social creatures though!
So if you are completely alone for a long while you can develop certain conditions!
Amazingly many people suffer from touch starvation, this results in "loner types" being very receptive to touch and embrace!
I met a girl through random chance and could tell we both were lacking genuine human comforts! So I hugged her she gripped me tightly and I felt human!.
Matter of time and attention!
Social interactions can and usually do have chances of opposite sex interaction!
Maybe take a chance!!!!!!
Finding a niche when you are fairly smart isnt too hard ???
I mean I found hippies and other types.
Physical activity is a huge boon nonetheless, and you get endorphin boosts from the type of shit. Touch grass go hard no??
Self fulfilling prophecies. Make a self fulfilling prophecy thats a bit more positive yea?
Details or null pointer for a response
>I don't want to feel like I'm repulsive.
Then don't feel that way.
Rest of your desires aren't F R E E, but this one is.
>fantasizing about being hugged
yeah... 8 years now
>How did you guys get used to being alone?
I didn't
>or are you finding ways to cope about it?
I tend to sleep a lot - the less time spent in the waking world, the better. Or maybe I'm just severly depressed.
I feel you brother.
>a hug from someone i can trust
That’s what doggos are for
i'm not a dog person. maybe a cat or a bnuuy.
I found my purpose and ambition in life.
So it is less painful. But, I'd love to have a loyal femanon companion who made 3D models for my game. A real ride or die chick. That'd be cool to have.
You're lonely because you're idle. Give your brain that stimulation it deserves, get good at something you enjoy.
this also get a whore at least twice a year
Illegal in most of America
I have read these exact two messages before what the fuck
This. I was diagnosed with Schizoid personality disorder which is comorbid with autism. By my nature I avoid social situations and rarely feel the need to socialize. In my case what that anon said above is what I do in general by design. However neurotypicals generally need to be social and that strategy might end up a cope with negative outcomes. Hobbies you have could be a way to find clubs to join or social events; I'm guessing Facebook would be a place to look but not sure as I don't use it/have one.
>get good at something you enjoy.
It's not possible
You'd have to be dead or severely brain-damaged with no limbs to be able to say that. The fact you're here and can post tells me you can.
>get good at something you enjoy.
how can i determine that anon ?
By doing things you dunce.
Go to your local boardgame store and check for meetups.
Go rock climbing.
Go buy one of those model kits online (or lego, if you have the money to burn).
Go write a book.
Go learn how to draw.
Go install Blender and start 3D modeling shit.
Go outside and ask people how their day is going.
Go buy a bicycle and start riding it.
Go to the gym.
Go look up recipes for cookies, buy some flour and start learning how to bake.
Doing things does not necessarily imply enjoyment.
but basically you saying that i should experiment various activities within the interval of environmental and financial restrainments it can act as an options narrower .
crippling depression got a hold of me a lot and it fucks up my will to even move sometimes , but i will think and find something .
Good recs.
I love rock climbing and tabletop, and I pitch it to people all the time.
Only thing I can't get behind are models.
They're just not my thing.
t. low tier autist as opposed to my esteemed high-tier autistic self
I do wish I had that level of autism, not even going to lie. I just really dislike figures and trophies that take up bookshelf space and serve no purpose than to occasionally look at.
They're cool to look at when at friends' houses, but I know that when I get stuff like that I don't appreciate them in the same way and they collect dust.
I do think I'd like them more if it weren't for my brainworms over them. I like little soldering kits, but I find the end products of those easier to give away as fun trinkets to people. I don't think people would enjoy an assembled Lego kit, lol.
Lego is great for that stuff because you can break it down and gift it to friends.
I personally only get bookshelf stuff of things that I have an emotional attachment to.
You know, I feel really dumb not even considering the fact that I could disassemble it and regift it that way.
The revolutionary concept of taking legos apart is a really embarrassing thing to fully realize is an option as a grown-ass man, lmao.
I don't know man, I think I just live with it. Never had a gf so in my experience I just gaslit myself into thinking I don't need one and distracting myself by playing games or hanging out with people.
Ultimately you have to find your place. Some people are meant to be alone. You have to reclaim your masculinity if you want to be valued as a man and be valued around others. Work on your body, posture and mannerisms. Become someone others want to approach and they will. It's seriously not that fucking hard after you put in the work. Be considerate, supportive, but assertive and dominant. Don't be fake but know when to keep quiet. Be the fucking man and people will treat you like it. Your new problem will be deciding who to give your limited time to.
I've put in the effort and have seen the results and I'm really sick of hearing young men openly whine about this shit like they're just owed it. Everyone is, and women, for all their faults aside, especially hate it. Hoeflation is indeed a major issue, but for every thousand whiny cunts complaining about it there's like ten outliers working to prove themself against the odds of this fucking clown world. You choose which one you are.
this is neurotic. he just doesn't want to be lonely.
No shit. This requires interest from other people and as a man, it must be earned if you desire it from others. Alternatively if you don't want company and also desire to escape this feeling, it must be accepted as isolation from them, and at that point it wouldn't be "loneliness" would it? I said man needs to find his place. If you want an "unlonely" place around other individuals you have to carve it yourself. It will not come to you.
I think you're using too many words to say what you want to say.
this is the truth
dumdum clickity
>dont be fake
>but be someone you are not
Looks like you didnt even read your own post, boomer
Even if you do find someone they can be quite fickle. About a third of men and women divorce. That's not to mention cheating, ghosting, etc. Eventually people start seeing a lot of people and avoiding commitment out of fear. It seems that in order to search for love you have to be heartless. Which honestly feels more lonely than just hanging with friends. Honestly might just switch to just hook ups at this point lol. Seems like a relationship is asking too much of someone.
I was forced into exile at age 11 so I've had a long time to adapt. Mostly, conversations with myself and online.
How were you forced into exile at age 11 anon?
Expelled from school and then when I was homeschooled I read about the Romans for the first time, learned that exile was one of the ultimate punishments, and accepted my fate
There's still something inherently dignified about being an exile
It means they wouldn't dare kill you.
Idk still haven't managed and it's consuming me more each year
Thanks for the thread OP.
Picrel is my cope of the month.
#
I relate to this picture so much. My moms are two attractive lesbians. I remember quad boob hugs like that giving me... feelings
>focus on something until you go genuinely insane
>lose all hope for a better future
>???????
>chill
I cope with constantly being stressed by overloading my life with work and uni.
I’ve been alone my entire life. Both my parents were professionals and I saw them for less than 2 hours a day. I dropped out of middle school and learned to feed myself. I’m still alone. It’s been 10 years. I’ve never had a friend or anything close to a gf the entire time. I live alone currently and live off of savings from odd jobs. Oddly enough all I can think about is living alone. I can’t even imagine having a wife.
>As a kid, parents are overprotective as fuck so i almost never attend outings and shit with my classmates
>I'm poor as fuck during college that parties and go outing with friends feels to painful for my budget
>Now that i have work, i ended up having zero interest in dealing with people since i was mostly alone during my earlier years
I was just being used to it and it will continue this way.
Now my main problem is how to kill myself when i reach 70s and/or have lots of sickness at that age since my 3rd world country prohibits euthanasia.
Lucid dreaming.
Sometimes I fuck it up and end up with sleep paralysis but the demon that enters my room is pretty chill and I like to think we're friends.
have you tried to hold a conversation with the demon
No, I'm lucky if I can move my fingers during sleep paralysis. Scary shit but I stopped being afraid of them, they mostly stand near the edge of my bed or wander around the room.
Teach me your secrets.
Nta,
Thank you
If we were to meet, I'd hug you and give you a neck and shoulder massage.
Acclimatization. Been a loner since I was 12. Maybe I'll try asking out that waitress next year, I know it'll fail because single women seemingly don't latently exist in my sphere anymore, but better to try than not.
just stop caring lol
This.
>Every cell of my body is telling me I'm in pain
Who cares, whatever man.
I haven't, therefore I have put pussy on pedastal which has made me.. At least less unhappy than doing nothing about. But I should make more money
dakimakura with my 2d wife
>The keyword is become!!
ye bro just change your personality on a switch, while you are at it, just become rich and successful, so ez... fucking namefags, retarded as always
>How did you guys get used to being alone?
I just preferred being alone because I didn't understand the feelings and behaviours of people, and so being with them frustrated me.
Also I'm not capable of loneliness, thus solving that problem.
>How did you guys get used to being alone?
I've never really had good friends my whole life. I was never unpopular, but just never had somebody who "got" me. However, I've definitely had women who "got" me, whom I was good friends with and would do sexual activities with. The conclusion I came to over the years is I only really need one friend: A girlfriend who's my best friend who enjoys sucking my dick. This isn't a shitpost. My last several girlfriends, we would do everything together (going out, hiking, watching TV, talking about literally anything) and it was enjoyable as hell, never a dull moment. Doing these things with a male friend or a female friend who isn't having sex with me I've found is kind of boring, so I usually withdraw from his male or female friend who makes attempts to hang out with me because it's not exciting if the prospect of sex isn't hanging in the air.
I started caring about myself.
I'm my own best friend now.
My self worth was is longer tied to the opinions of others.
I learned to actually appreciate the time spent with others instead of view them as a way to temporarily distract myself.
I think back positively on time spent with them and don't lament that we've drifted apart or that things will never be the same.
I can't promise anyone I'll be around forever, and I don't expect that of them either.
I'm glad I got to share those moments with them and they chose to share those moments with me.
Sometimes I reach out to let people know I was thinking about them. I'm not trying to rekindle anything, it's just nice to know someone thinks about you from time to time.
Every good and bad experience has shaped me into the erson I am today, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
There are lessons to be learned from difficult times. Sometimes you have someone to share them with, sometimes they're caused by someone else, and sometimes you do it yourself or deal with it alone.
Knowing if you need to reach out is a good skill. Other people are generally kind and take pleasure in helping.
Knowing and communicating what is actually a request for advice/help and what is a rant is important, because no one wants to feel like their advice is going to waste on a person determined to wallow.
I'm very happy alone, and frankly prefer it sometimes.
I try my best to rationalize my thoughts before bringing them up to others. I would rather be a source of positivity, and sometimes that involves keeping my blind anger to myself until I calm down. I want more of what comes out of my mouth to be helpful or kind than unhinged rants. Sometimes I can't help it, but I know dwelling isn't healthy and it will pass if you let it.
I find new people to share bits of my life with constantly like a magnet, and I know more will come.
I'm honest with my emotions and my mistakes so that others may trust me or be able to avoid what I couldn't.
fag
Great post.
>How did you guys get used to being alone?
>or are you finding ways to cope about it?
find something you enjoy doing by yourself, and go all in. eventually maybe you can find people who also like to do that one thing and eventually do that with them
I was fine being by myself until I had someone in my life and then she left.
I don’t mind it most of the time, I just don’t like being alone and living like a recluse all of the time. So thats why I go places and do things.
Been alone 10 years straight, you get used to it after a year or two but also you find ways to cope with the boredom by taking up a dozen hobbies.
I'm an autistic extrovert.
Even as an extrovert, autistic people are the elite cream of the human crop when it comes to dealing with isolation without going insane.
Other people basically cease to exist when they're alone, they see the void and it drives them mad, usually sooner rather than later. I heard a story of some 18 year old who killed himself just because he had to live alone in his college dorm room for a few months at the start of the pandemic. Even though I can understand how that would be unbearable for him, the same thing could never happen to me.
We have an entire internal mental universe we can occupy ourselves with and meditate on.
I still like other people and want to spend time around them, even if they can be draining sometimes, especially if they're full neurotypicals.
You're not autistic at all. You're an npc
Oh? Please elaborate anon
Been over an hour, no response from anon. I guess I broke his script
Let's say the problem is not that I am autistic anymore, but rather lack practical direction on how to have people to hang out with and improve my social life.
What advice would you give me?
I'm thinking of just going to bars.
I like bars with games. Doesn't really matter the type of game, I'll play anything. I've even brought my own set of cards against humanity to dive bars after getting acquainted with some of the regulars.
Beyond that, I also enjoy social dances, makerspaces, conferences, game tournaments, and various other flavors of workshops/classes.
I don't use it as a means of socializing, but I have made many friends at various volunteer events/organizations.
Animal shelters or sanctuaries are the best.
I get to play and care for fun/cute animals for a couple hours, and women I talk to later always take great interest in it as if I'm doing it out of the goodness of my heart, when in reality I just want to pet/play with some cats or birds every once in a while and don't want the responsibility of caring for and cleaning up after one daily. Win-Win.
You can volunteer for tiddy-cancer 5k runs, nature park cleanups, feeding stinky homeless people, do setup at the retard Olympics, or help show school kids the wonders of robot-on-robot violence, just to name some ideas.
Some involve more abilities to socialize than others, but all of them give you something to talk about later when flirting with the local barista or bar folk.
I'm a computer nerd and that rarely makes for good conversation, so they make for good supplementary topics, even if you're just a little dumb and boring in reality like I am. The juxtaposition between me sounding like a sweet guy with good moral character and how I sometimes enjoy being punk guttertrash with the mouth of a sailor is a fun thing to play with.
I'm pretty quick to tell them that I do the things I do, like the animal stuff. Honestly, when telling people I do the animal stuff for selfish reasons, they get a kick out of it. It's genuinely hard to make yourself look like a bad guy, no matter how you frame it. They know I love animals and helping people, as much as I try to have fun in saying I don't.
I got into waifus and gachas for a good while. Then I had a dream about hanging out with my friends from over 15 years ago and I remembered how much better talking to real people is than spending all day online or fantasizing about fictional women.
It says alot the only person who was actually loving in my life was a girl i met from WoW, i loved her back but she was across the country and we could never meet. I still think about her
i never had any close irl friends, i got used to being alone i usually find ways to deal with it, although i think it's starting to take it's toll. i just want to hug and cuddle with someone, not in a sexual way i just want to be held
Dunno, just eventually stopped caring.
It took some time, but lack of contact with people outside of my family just became the norm.
Do I miss it? Kinda.
Am I actively looking for it? No
Does it hurt? Only sometimes.
I'm so used to it now, I get annoyed whenever I have to deal with people
>was used to being alone for my whole life, 29 years
>got a summer gf this last summer and lost her in september
>can't stand being alone now
It was like opening a old closed scar.
Maybe it was the kick in the ass I needed to properly dedicate to getting a gf tho.
Used to...?
I don't think there's really any good way. What I did for several years up until now (and honestly of course there's regret, but now I'm in a situation I have a lot of difficulty handling because I crippled myself through this) was just enjoy myself through garbage like videogames, anime, tv shows, and awful consumerism. It's shit. My vanishing made things really difficult in life. I used not to be alone like this. I couldn't cope after 8 fucking years.
Meditation and acceptance. Your feelings chase you because you're running from them.
>accept loneliness
>forget about loneliness
>still lonely
>experience virtual expression of companionship
>loneliness returns, only it's five times as strong
Fuck you
If you're this upset about it then you didn't accept it.
Dating sims
There not really a "getting used" when I've always been like this. Alone is the default for me, not being alone is what I have trouble getting used to.
>get used to
Lmao you don't get used to it unless you're one of the few autists who are super into your hobby or passion to where having a partner or a very tight friend group isn't a necessity.
If I didn't have a few friends I could have over or go drinking with i genuinely would pull a Leaving Las Vegas and just wither away once I blow all my money.
>How did you guys get used to being alone?
Accepting that I am too unstable for women and that after them tormenting me in my past, present and of course they will do it in my future, at least I won't coexist with one on the same roof (God I hope so bad I can own a house please have mercy)
>ways to cope about it?
Escapism. Videogames, music, walk my dogs. And after I finish my college exams (of a career I'm not sure about and I'm starting to regret) I would like to return to an old hobby I abandoned don't know why, Entomology
I went completely into being a weeb. Anime figures, waifu manga, romance games, hell I just got my first daki. I know that it isn't the same but it sort of scratches the itch and I can imagine being the guy sometimes in the sappy romance stuff.
I'm not lonely, I'm a loner.
Whenever I spend time with other people I always feel like I put more into it than I get out of it
Every time I talk with people it feels like everyone's being fake, everyone's only pretending to listen to me or pay attention to me and they'll just forget about me the minute I'm not around
And the evidence is strong. Told a bunch of guys I hang out with I got laid off a month ago, I haven't seen them since, they haven't checked up on me since.
Why even bother if this is the kind of "relationships" I form? It always fizzles out, like I'm chafing in a situation I'm not meant to be in.
I'm addicted to monarchs, and I live within my mind about what life would be if I was married to one in traditional times. How we could go on long walks, and touch each other's hands.
I’m in my 30s now so there’s not much that I can do about being alone. I would like some friendships like the ones I had in my late teens but that is an immature thing to want
i started lifting, reading and followed a dream. relationships became secondary. still get those reminders every now and then, when you see a beautiful girl or a happy couple, but its very bearable and not something i lose sleep over
Bros...here's the thing, I never would have thought that I'm gonna ask a question here. but mentally ill, subhuman incels were that much of a mistake? what happened?
My last girlfriend was extremely needy, clingy, and codependent. Leaving her was a massive weight off my shoulders and made me never want to date again.
As for friends, I always had the vibe that I wasn't wanted. Except for one dude that wouldn't stop nagging me to get a job, even though it didn't affect him at all. Cutting contact with them felt like it was best for both parties.
As for staying alone, I've just grown to like it. I even got rid of my cellphone. Socializing just feels like a chore now, so I avoid it at all costs.
I think I might have just developed a personality disorder though. Either Schizoid PD or Avoidant PD.
She dumped you. The sooner you drop the coping larp, the sooner you move on.
I literally told her I didn't love her anymore and didn't want to be with her. I can't tell if you baiting or just projecting your own insecurities.
Ah, yes, the good old projecting. She dumped you. The path towards healing is to let it go. Let go!
Ah, yes, the good old baiting. I dumped her. The path towards healing is making your bait less obvious.
good job
It wasn't your fault. I can project my sympathy, you deserved better than to be dumped like a literal sack of shit in the trash. Maybe it was her loss. Be strong, brother, you deserve better. Go hit that gym and show her what she's lost. Buy one of those home projector thingies while you're at it. Do it for me. For us.
15 anime body pillows and counting
>im 31, never dated, never kissed, nothing but now that im older i sort of know that its over and am "better" at handling failure because i am not really trying to ascend
the best you can do is to be kind to yourself, and find copes, for me its watching vids of younger incels and hearing their problems,
usually it would be hooking up with gay guys through grinder every month or so just to cuddle, no seggs.
but that's only during rough patches when I don't have a best bud to fall back on.
>How did you guys get used to being alone?
its all Ive ever known and it is killing me
>or are you finding ways to cope about it?
alcohol and motorsports. drivving real fast