>girlfriend told me of her getting raped back in high school

>girlfriend told me of her getting raped back in high school
>she never told me of it until two years into our relationship
>it was completely avoidable, but she took the most tarded decisions in the situation
>can't look at her the same ever since (last few days)
>the guy is a rich piece of shit and I know his name
It's late here, and I can't sleep. It's like that for a while. I fricking hate this shit.

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Do what you must

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      as in?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        What your heart says

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Sounds like the typical woman shittest to see how you would react. She probably wasn't even raped, but I wanted it to happen and only claimed rape so that you wouldn't think she's a bawd

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >it was completely avoidable, but she took the most tarded decisions in the situation
    Your girl just told you she got raped as a high schooler and that's what you're thinking about you dumb c**t? Instead of thinking about her wellbeing, you're focusing more on yourself and her not feeling comfortable initially telling you she got fricking raped. I almost want you to break up with her for her own sake

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You're right, I am just way too angry I guess. I want to cut the fricker's balls off.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        That's a much more understandable response but you need to prioritize how she feels first, make her feel supported. If you're not a dumb c**t this shouldn't change your opinion of her and you should express that to her

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          I am a bit of a dumb c**t I guess, because I still think that even though she was blameless, she only got it because she acted stupid for a good while. This makes me feel bad about myself too, it's obviously a shit way to look at it.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            You're a shitty person but I still wish this didn't happen to your gf

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Tell the story

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            It's not a lot; she goes to the fricker's house to drink, he forcefully kisses her down two glasses and then does it on his sister's bed, despite the objections, again, forcefully.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >she goes to the fricker's house to drink
            She knew what she was doing then. No girl does that unless she is wanting sex.

            >does it on his sister's bed, despite the objections
            Kinky! Who was objecting, the sister or your gf?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >she only got it because she acted stupid for a good while
            however true this might be, you have to realize that every single person, including you experiences varying levels of knowledge and perspective at all points in time
            what you think may be common knowledge or something obvious, isn't always and external factors contribute to that
            obviously as a guy being raped is unthinkable but there's a shit of things at play for women

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Like what?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Knowledge possessed from the people you hang out with is different from guys to girls
            Girls typically aren't online in the more genuine or intellectual spaces where people freely exchange useful info or views
            Girls are conditioned to an extent to value saving face over valuing their autonomy leading to a girl saying no a few times and then just letting it happen
            Girls can often feel as if they can't say no because the threat of violence and outright rape exists anyway therefore they should let it happen to save injuries

            This is how those shitheads keep getting away with it. A horrid combination of a sexualized society without strong boundaries, an endless supply of naive young women, and the obnoxious tendency of women to just bury rape instead of actually reporting the subhumans responsible. You should still look in to the statute of limitations for rape to see if you can make any report at all. If she was a minor, it might be longer than for rape of an adult where you live.

            If you wouldn't have a problem with consensual sex, though (which would be justified, since her own choices are her responsibility), you have even less of a reason to be upset at her about the rape.

            [...]
            Going to a man's house alone specifically to drink alcohol is comically moronic.

            >Going to a man's house alone specifically to drink alcohol is comically moronic
            If you're a guy or girl who knows the implications sure, if you don't then not as much
            Even then, implications don't override consent, just because you say yes at the start doesn't mean you can't withdraw minutes before

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          > If you're not a dumb c**t this shouldn't change your opinion of her
          Not being morally responsible for being raped doesn't mean she isn't morally responsible for her own actions leading up to it.
          Knowing your gf had a staggering lack of self-respect and level of stupidity to get into a bad situation which then turned much worse is reason enough to have your perception of her change. Doubly so if she didn't report the rape.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            She didn't report it, and it was at least 5 years ago, so the law isn't doing anything. Who knows how many other occasions with this guy.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            This is how those shitheads keep getting away with it. A horrid combination of a sexualized society without strong boundaries, an endless supply of naive young women, and the obnoxious tendency of women to just bury rape instead of actually reporting the subhumans responsible. You should still look in to the statute of limitations for rape to see if you can make any report at all. If she was a minor, it might be longer than for rape of an adult where you live.

            If you wouldn't have a problem with consensual sex, though (which would be justified, since her own choices are her responsibility), you have even less of a reason to be upset at her about the rape.

            >she only got it because she acted stupid for a good while
            however true this might be, you have to realize that every single person, including you experiences varying levels of knowledge and perspective at all points in time
            what you think may be common knowledge or something obvious, isn't always and external factors contribute to that
            obviously as a guy being raped is unthinkable but there's a shit of things at play for women

            Going to a man's house alone specifically to drink alcohol is comically moronic.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            There's no hope of convincing any jury, and I doubt she wants to see him again, or let her family/friends know for that matter.
            But you are right about how they get away, and it makes me even more pissed.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >Going to a man's house alone specifically to drink alcohol is comically moronic.

            >she goes to the fricker's house to drink
            She knew what she was doing then. No girl does that unless she is wanting sex.

            >does it on his sister's bed, despite the objections
            Kinky! Who was objecting, the sister or your gf?

            >>she goes to the fricker's house to drink
            >She knew what she was doing then. No girl does that unless she is wanting sex.
            This^

            She didn't report it, and it was at least 5 years ago, so the law isn't doing anything. Who knows how many other occasions with this guy.

            >She didn't report it
            Because it wasn't rape.

            She is just lying to you to manipulate you somehow, maybe to make you feel sorry for her and simp more.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            She has no reason to lie about it, I have no issues with my partners' past consensual relationships.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            How can she expect the law to do anything if she didnt report the motherfricker...thanks to her i guarantee there are more victims. People who are raped dont report it should face prison time gor allowing these frickers 2 be free

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        No, it's perfectly natural to feel what you feel. Just take some time, process it and let it pass. Take however you feel at the end and apply that to how you handle it with your girl.

        It may not be fair, but you can't force your self not to feel things and trying to do so won't help the situation.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          I am just too inexperienced about this, despite my age. I just don't know how to handle this. I can't look at her the same and I can't sleep normally for the last few days. I just lay down and wait to pass out.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            It's perfectly natural for you to be torn between wanting to protect your mate and chiding her for being reckless and getting herself into such a situation.
            Maybe it would help if you tried to find out whether she learned from her mistakes and would never repeat them or do similar again and would be able to pass on the necessary wisdom to your children if it came to that.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >I can't look at her the same
            This is common. We have an image of a person in our minds that can be changed or when new information appears, and sometimes that change has an impact on how we feel about them.

            As I said, it may not be fair since it wasn't something she did by choice, but you feel how you feel and all the mental gymnastics you can throw at it won't change that. Give yourself some time to process it before you decide what to do with it.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            It's been a few days already, and I am still dumbfounded.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I had a gf in hs who said she was raped before I knew her. A very similar story, actually. She did something dumb and a guy took advantage of it, then didn't report it or try to address what it did to her. I went through the same things as you. I even had a plan to kill the guy at one stage, though obviously I never went through with it.

            In my case it ended up destroying our relationship. I became oversensitive to triggering her, which led to her being a b***h to me and using "I was raped" as an "I win" button every time she fricked me over, which was a lot.

            It sounds harsh and I know some people here are going to come down on me for it, but raped women are damaged goods and if they don't take steps to try and address that damage, you're better off without them in your life.

            Not sure what I'm trying to say with all of this. Just that you're not alone in this situation, I guess.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Shit sucks, it really sucks. I wish hell was real.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I feel you bro, I really do. It'll pass. Just process it in your own time and don't do anything decisive until you're ready.

            She's dropped a bomb on you. You don't recover from that overnight.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I am afraid of this shit always staying in my mind when I'm with her, that would make it insufferable, and I would get alienated as time goes on.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I would break up ngl. Not specifically bc of the incident but bc of her gfs terrible decision making and keeping this from you for 2 years.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            these things aren't easy to just outright talk about, don't tell the guy to do something dramatic, he might actually fricking do it.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I wish I could tell you that won't happen, but there's a chance that it will. What I can say is that the worst of it will pass with time, one way or another.

            It'll help if you can get your mind off it for a little while. Go do something that takes strong physical effort and let your subconscious deal with it for a while, rather than just letting it thump around your skull making you feel like shit.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I will do that I guess, I didn't go to gym for two days, but it wouldn't be helpful since I got so little sleep the last few days.

            it's incredible what women pass as "rape" these days...

            Did the guy trap her, beat her up and forced his way in against her will? If so, she was indeed raped.

            Did the guy purposedly poison her in order to leave her unconscious and have sex with her in that state? If so, she was indeed raped

            Anything else that doesn't fall into this category, is not rape

            He did it despite multiple loud as clear objections.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >He did it despite multiple loud as clear objections.
            Yes, objections followed by getting into his sister's bed instead of leaving,

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            She didn't get in in her own will, I don't want to fricking detail the thing.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >>it was completely avoidable, but she took the most tarded decisions in the situation

      It's a completely normal reaction. She trusted him with that and he should be kind to her. But can you imagine if your dumb ass 7 feet little brother got beat up, humiliated, bullied and forced to do incest audio porn by a 3 feet dwarf?
      Your little brother ruined his relationship with you his sibling, because now he has a trauma about incest, because he couldn't do something as simple as slapping the dwarf. And his life was ruined.

      Now, I believe that you have more than 50IQ, so you'll understand that this 7 foot lil bro had much less to fear than this guy's girlfriend, but this guy feels that it was very avoidable. Can you use the empathy part of your brain a little and feel how fricking stupid and miserable it feels that something important was ruined in a very avoidable way?

      I'm not telling OP to go say this to his gf, that'd make him moronic and an butthole.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Gr8 b8 m8 i r8 2/8

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Ah yes, she totally didn't expect that Harry Wheyberg would offer her drugs and actually expect sex in return.

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >the guy is rich
    >"""raped""
    don't know how to tell you this, but she wanted it and retroactively cried rape

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      She has no reason to lie about it, if there was a consensual relationship in her past, I would accept it and she knows this.

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    told me of her getting raped back in high school
    Sounds hot.
    Tell us more. Details.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      have a nice day.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >gay

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    You ever think of forgiving her OP?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Forgive? She didn't do anything morally wrong, she just did stupid shit over and over again and got taken advantage of. It's not about forgiveness, it's about being the same with her, which I can't now.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        So you have forgiven her?

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    it's incredible what women pass as "rape" these days...

    Did the guy trap her, beat her up and forced his way in against her will? If so, she was indeed raped.

    Did the guy purposedly poison her in order to leave her unconscious and have sex with her in that state? If so, she was indeed raped

    Anything else that doesn't fall into this category, is not rape

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You stupid worthless c**t, if she said no but he forced himself on her, it's rape. If she was made incapable of saying no and he fricked her anyway

      I would break up ngl. Not specifically bc of the incident but bc of her gfs terrible decision making and keeping this from you for 2 years.

      You're also a dumb fricking c**t, terrible decision making? She was in high school you piece of shit, what was her terrible decision? Going over to a guy's house? Does a woman consent to any fricking form of sexual assault the instant she enters a man's home? She didn't tell him for 2 years because it was a deeply traumatic event and she probably struggles to share it with anyone. How are you so fricking braindead? Genuinely mind-blowing

      She didn't get in in her own will, I don't want to fricking detail the thing.

      OP you stupid fricker get off this god damn website, the degenerate filth drowns out any worthwhile perspectives that may exist here. God I fricking hate this board, flooded to hell with deranged incels who have somehow lost all capacity for empathy yet think they're the victims

      >Going to a man's house alone specifically to drink alcohol is comically moronic.
      [...]
      >>she goes to the fricker's house to drink
      >She knew what she was doing then. No girl does that unless she is wanting sex.
      This^
      [...]
      >She didn't report it
      Because it wasn't rape.

      She is just lying to you to manipulate you somehow, maybe to make you feel sorry for her and simp more.

      Please do us all a favor and have a nice day

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        You are kind of right, but I also got level headed takes such as

        Knowledge possessed from the people you hang out with is different from guys to girls
        Girls typically aren't online in the more genuine or intellectual spaces where people freely exchange useful info or views
        Girls are conditioned to an extent to value saving face over valuing their autonomy leading to a girl saying no a few times and then just letting it happen
        Girls can often feel as if they can't say no because the threat of violence and outright rape exists anyway therefore they should let it happen to save injuries

        [...]
        >Going to a man's house alone specifically to drink alcohol is comically moronic
        If you're a guy or girl who knows the implications sure, if you don't then not as much
        Even then, implications don't override consent, just because you say yes at the start doesn't mean you can't withdraw minutes before

        too. I never had a big brother and I am too embarrassed to talk about it with the old man, so I did this. It's cringy but I doubt if I will regret this.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          What is it that you're confused about anon? Like what advice are you seeking?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I just don't know how to handle this, I am afraid of it always being stuck in my mind and making me unable to pursue this relationship.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            What part of it is stuck in your mind? Like what are you struggling to figure out? If it's pure rage and a desire to murder the guy, that I totally understand. But it seems more like you're struggling with how to reconcile this information with how you already view your gf. Why? Why would this change your impression of her?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I will always try not to think of that thing while I am with her, probably to no avail, just because she did an avoidable, stupid shit.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            What stupid shit? Going over to a guy's house to drink? That sounds like very normal teenager behavior to me dude. Even if it wasn't the brightest idea, she was a frickin high schooler. Plus even if it was a dumb decision, does it fricking matter? She's not the one at fault here

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            That still is some stupid shit, that and not reporting it, and I should go to sleep I guess.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Have you never done anything stupid in your life that you regret anon? When it comes to women reporting rape, it's a lot of complicated shit man. She'd be admitted to the world she got raped and she'd have to go up against the guy in front of the community and try to prove herself right when in the end she could fail and he could get away with it anyway. Personally, I think it would be best if victims could report stuff but I get why many don't. Go to sleep man, if you care about her focus on how you can be there for her. Don't make her regret telling you

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >its my gfs fault she got raped
            lmfao omg the stupidity

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Adding on to this, I should probably get some fricking sleep. Maybe even shank the guy at one point. I am just too tired.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >She was in high school you piece of shit, what was her terrible decision?
        She was clearly up to no good when she went to his house for alcohol. If this happened in the US (and Americans are the ones who tend to call it 'high school', that's illegal underage drinking and something she would have been well aware of. She chose to do it anyway.

        What stupid shit? Going over to a guy's house to drink? That sounds like very normal teenager behavior to me dude. Even if it wasn't the brightest idea, she was a frickin high schooler. Plus even if it was a dumb decision, does it fricking matter? She's not the one at fault here

        Not all teenagers are impulsive degenerates. Not all teenagers are interested in alcohol, let alone going to a man's house by themselves just to drink and be rebellious.
        She is not at fault for rape, but she IS at fault for the character flaws and stupidity which set up the circumstances for the rape to occur.

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    This really is not the place to ask about such a thing.

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why don't you "take out the trash"? Or you could "bump into him" on his way to work.

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Something about this thread made me decide to change my mind about women getting themselves raped. Before I read this thread, I would've said that there's no way a woman could be so stupid and inept that she could let something like this happen if it were actually against her will. Like obviously, if a woman goes to a guy's house she doesn't even know that well to drink, then obviously he's going to want to have sex. And then if he tries to frick her and she doesn't fight back then obviously she didn't get raped because she wanted it to happen. And then if she doesn't go to the cops, that's just nail-in-the-coffin proof that she actually wanted it. I just thought, there's no possible way women could be so stupid and weak, they must be wanting it and lying, that's the only way this story could make sense, because I could not fathom myself in the same circumstance.

    But today, I'm ready to accept that women really can be this stupid and inept. I bet there are a huge percentage of women running around who don't know that every guy wants to frick them. And I bet a huge percentage of them, if you push them down onto a bed, they'll just be so scared that they won't even do anything, and they'll just let you rape them. They won't even fight or scream despite actually not wanting it, imagine this? And I'm ready to believe that women are so impotent that they'll just let you get away with it.

    Women, I'm sorry I've doubted you for so many years. I was giving you way too much credit.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      people don't realize that in the past women were treated as property not because men thought they were subhuman but for their own protection. if a woman belongs to a man rape is less likely to happen due to that threat. women are stupid and easily intimidated without a man.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, this really makes sense. I have never considered raping a woman in my life, but to hear about how easy it is, it really makes me feel like a chump. I could've spent my entire life up to this point just wantonly raping and probably would never face any consequences. Instead I've wasted all this time and effort trying to get "consent" because I was afraid of getting in trouble, while guys like the guy in OP's story just do anything they want and get away with it. I wish someone would have told me about this 15 years ago.

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Frick anyone telling you you should feel ashamed or not think one way. You have to choose what is best for you and nothing more, it was stupid and naive to go alone to a guys home. Why does that matter? Why are you with her OP? I believe your pain comes from this new knowledge clashing with your interpretation of reality. Does it hurt because it doesn't feel fair that he got away with it? Does it bother you that he's rich, got your gf into his home willingly, got his way with her no problem and she choose to not make a problem of it? Do you feel like a chump because his life may be better that yours and in some sense he had your gf for free? You have to be brutality honest with you and identity where the pain comes from

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Jesus fricking christ some of these comments are awful. When I went to report CSA that had been ongoing for several years, multiple people--people who were genuinely concerned and cared for me--asked me if I was sure I wanted to move forward with the case. This was a clear case with a recorded fricking confession from the perpetrator, and the school counselor, cops, and my parents still asked multiple times. The whole process was fricking humiliating and I knew I'd be made out to be a villain hellbent on ruining the perpetrator's life.
    Victims of SA don't want to file a report because they're afraid of being seen the way you now see your gf. If you can't move past it and recognize that she's the same person she has always been, whether or not you knew about the events that occurred, you should just break up with her. It's okay if you're not ready or willing to handle something like this, but I think you would do more harm than good to each other if you tried to maintain the relationship without addressing her past.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I just don't believe you, prostitute.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        have a nice day, incel

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      First of all, I can't think of any good reason for everyone to be so invasive with you when they already had all the evidence they needed, and it's just disgusting that they had any concern for the piece of shit perpetrator.
      That said:
      >Victims of SA don't want to file a report because they're afraid of being seen the way you now see your gf.
      This doesn't make things better in the long run. I can't imagine what it's like being the victim and then slogging through the system to make sure people are reported, but reporting it is necessary to punish the people responsible, and withholding it for any reason just makes it easier for the perpetrators to get away with it and for other people to not take her claims seriously.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        It's not easy to ask this of a high school student who still has to go to school full time, keep up grades, and prepare for college or a job, not to mention how fast rumors spread in school. I'm not so heartless as to expect all victims, especially minors who are scared and confused, to give up so much of their time and be dragged through the mud when they've suffered so much already.
        Also, some people will never take SA allegations seriously anyway and nothing will convince them otherwise (as you can see in comments above). (The social worker assigned to my case actually said "some kids ask for it".) I still wonder if I made the right choice because the he was a rich butthole who hired a great lawyer and now lives off his parents overseas. What justice did I bring? All I can say is at least I stood up for myself, but in the end it was kind of a waste of time.
        I don't know if the last part is causing you a lot of distress about your gf's actions, but I hope you come to understand this: the victim is not responsible for whatever crimes the perpetrator may choose to commit in the future. That's on the perpetrator. I'm guessing your gf was young and didn't have the resources or courage. When she was most vulnerable and alone, she chose to protect herself in what she thought was the best possible option. I obviously don't know the whole story, but I hope you can have an open conversation with her to understand better what was going through her mind during all of this, and what she thinks now.

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    welcome to real life. why is it distressing, because you feel familial toward your girlfriend? I wouldn't care. I know several people who were raped as children and life never stopped for that.

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >the guy is a rich piece of shit and I know his name
    She was asking for it

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Tell the story details pls

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    dump her

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