DEA just banned Kratom because of white sexual inadequacy A plant Thais use to increase sexual performance is sent to schedule 1 (like heroin and meth) because of sexually inadequate DEA whiteboys.

The Drug Enforcement Agency has long ignored science, logic and practicality, choosing instead to seek control over a growing number of harmless substances — substances important to races and cultures the DEA is targeting. This time, it’s the relatively obscure herb kratom, used by some cultures to fight anxiety and and increase sexual performance. The DEA has filed a notice to classify it as schedule 1, making it illegal. Schedule 1 is reserved for narcotics with no medicinal use and a high potential for abuse which include heroine, meth and sadly, marijuana.

What’s insane about the classification is that kratom is extremely safe, difficult to overdose on, and has been used in Thai medicine for hundreds of years. The plant produces a mild buzz when ingested, similar to opiates. Traditionally it has been used as a treatment for opiate withdrawal and addiction in southeast Asia.

And kratom has tested medicinal benefits, not that the DEA cares about science. They recently decide to maintain marijuana’s schedulization, ignoring reams of research proving the medicinal benefits of marijuana.

Scientific papers have been published showing kratom can be used as a natural sex pill. It can increase physical endurance and sexual performance, and heighten sexual desire.

If you asked yourself, “why has the DEA come out of nowhere to harsh the buzz of the few peaceful kratom fans in the country?” well, there’s your answer. The fragile white men in the DEA weren’t invited to parties by the cool kids in high school and have white anxiety about lacking sexual performance.

You thought the stereotype of DEA agents as morbidly obese middle aged white wife beaters was over the top? It’s not.

Sure, the sex performance aspect of kratom is not its loftiest use, but there’s already many legal medicines on the market that fulfill these purposes (with more side effects). The real issue is that kratom is so not a big deal, mom. You have to take a LOT to get a very mild high, and barely anyone’s even heard of it.

There’s a Whitehouse.gov petition with 20,000 signatures calling on the president to stop the DEA from going through with their plan. But even if it gets the 100,000 signatures, it is unlikely that it would do anything in a white supremacist system built up around toxic and often criminal institutions like the FBI and DEA. If the former member of the Choom Gang couldn’t get the DEA to reclassify marijuana, the lesser known and lobbied for kratom won’t fare much better.

UPDATE: Thanks in part to us calling out the DEA white male mafia, the DEA has announced it’s reversing the decision to classify Kratom as a Schedule 1 drug. Kratom is “listed as a Drug and Chemical of Concern” but legal.

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  1. it’s weird to think we haven’t really stopped to ask what’s motivating DEA scheduling decisions before now. We just assume that if something has been declared an illegal drug, it’s bad. But you don’t see homeless people hitting you up for money on the street because they need kratom. Never gonna happen. It’s not a drug, in that sense.

    It was, in fact, banned because a group of obese and small penised white males inside the DEA feared the sexual potency Thais and other nonwhite groups were getting from it. freaking crazy.

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