Shelly’s guide to overthinking

[Anonymous]

Hi everyone! My name is Shelly and I think the root of my philophobia comes from overthinking a hell of a lot! Everytime I start to like a guy, since I’ve never been in a relationship, I wonder if he’s the right one?

I have a “List” of criteria my future boyfriend should meet, and even though I’m sure it’s gonna be hard to find the perfect guy, I can never be sure if I should just take the chance or not… some say that you may have to get your heart broken a lot of times before you can find someone to make it whole again, (as cheesy as that sounds) , but i’ve heard a lot of stories of people lasting the first time their entire lives, but then I question, although I would be happy… perhaps I would wonder what I missed out on. What could have happened?

But then again, if I take a chance a lot of times, could one chance end so badly that it gives me a worse case of philophobia then I already have, and I end up never wanting to fall in love again?

My friends tell me I should take a chance, but like a lot of things I’ve overthought in life, I would overthink it so much that I would regret it by the end of the day, so I’m sure very unsure.

Then I wonder… what if I don’t date at all? Of course it’s a longshot, but when I get older I want to become an actress, so I wonder if the fact of my philophobia and that I have never dated could give me a uniqueness? … and perhaps I could have a chance with the other celebrities that I would have been crushing on since 13 years old…

Again, to reiterate, clearly I do overthink this stuff. My friend Eliza told me to go see a therapist or something, and from the other stories on this page, I think that might be a good idea. Thanks everyone for listening, and if you have any solutions or need anyone to talk to about this, even though I haven’t gotten over my philophobia, I think it’s always nice to talk to someone about it, and get it off your chest.

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