How can I stop being a "Chameleon"?
I'm whoever I need to be at a given time. If I need to be liked, I put on my "sociable, funny" personality. If I'm at work I put on my "Professional, intense, hard-ass" personality.
Nothing I do is natural to me. Whenever I'm screaming at someone I don't actually feel that, I'm just "acting" it out...
I also base these personalities on people I know. I imitate their mannerisms and speech, how they'd react, etc.
Under all of that though, there isn't much of "me". The mask tends to slip when I'm tired, or acting for a long time.
My speech turns monotonous, I can't bring myself to emote or act. My true feelings of "nothing" shine through.
I feel like I don't understand myself at all, despite preferring to spend time alone.
I feel nothing from failure or achievement. I have goals and aspirations, yes, but I don't feel anything towards getting them. It's just another dot.