why do i feel like i'm trans and take hrt but then after some months feel like i'm making a terrible mistake? and repeat.
Relationships uncensored
why do i feel like i'm trans and take hrt but then after some months feel like i'm making a terrible mistake? and repeat.
i hate being alive
Go to dbt
What is dbt?
I just feel miserable
Don't you bpds feel that about everything? Maybe consider you can make mistakes but not everthing has to be a total disaster. Maybe you're trans and making mistakes, maybe you're not making a mistake, maybe you memed yourself into being trans. Does it matter? Aim at the result to stop being miserable in your life and try looking at mistakes as part of getting there, trial and error.
>what is dbt
Dialectical behavioural therapy. A therapy program designed specifically for borderline to learn some nuance and mindfulness. One example of a problem it helps you deal with.
>person has a bad day and yells insults at you
>you draw the conclusion that person must hate you, because person expressed strong negative emotions towards you
>dbt teaches you to put more emphasis that maybe person just has a bad day and doesn't have strong feelings against you personally but just a general sense of dissatisfaction
I wish I could recommend you a dbt book, but I don't have bpd. I just read the whole program because I'm a dumb autist and some nurse told me to do the program but didn't accurately specifiy to skip to one of the later chapters with the mindfulness exercises for everyone. There are lots of dbt books you can buy aimed at patients, because a therapists will never be on call 24/7 to help you deal with a crisis.
Help
I have no fricking idea man if you ever figure I out let me know so I can understand it in myself too
cause life is just fricked, we have a condition that makes us hate ourselves. not much we can do, have to find a way to cope.
Maybe because you start feeling better after a few months and then you stop focusing on dysphoria as much and then it starts weighing on you how tons of people hate you for just trying to vibe
i.e. internalized transphobia
It's More like the dysphoria goes away and I feel like a cis male
Maybe you are gender-fluid or genderqueer or something else on the gender spectrum. Maybe you should microdose.
Wouldn't microdose just give me breasts and maybe a bit better skin? If anything I'd like no breasts but femenine facial features and fat distribution
How? I can't cum at all
If you get off anti-depressents and anti-androgens your dick works again
No anti depressions or t blockers
Just monotherpy and I can't cum lol
that's normal, but why do you need to cum so much, it's just fluid lol. you still get orgasms and erections, also if you regularly use it (as in get it erect), it won't even shrink.
if it's like that HRT removes your dysphoria and it comes back if you stop then I would just stay on HRT despite feeling like cis male.
most likely feeling like cis male is some delusion since if it's HRT that removes your dysphoria it literally means you are trans lol. that's like whole point of treatment.
if you wanna be absolutely sure you could try being off HRT for long time to see if your dysphoria is cycling regardless if you take HRT or not and if that happens then I would look for other options of treatments than transitioning.
>then I would look for other options of treatments than transitioning.
Such as?
Is hrt really a bad idea of it cycles?
therapy aimed you to be comfortable as cis male or hell alternatively therapy to be comfortable as trans woman if you feel fem is more of your thing.
either way, you need to choose your preferred hormone and the life that comes with it. of course permaboymode on estrogen is relevant option too.
Aaaaaaaaa
How do you even approach therapy as a estrogen diy that's questioningly?
Aaaaaaaaaaaa
>Be male with fem interests
>Live life normally
>Make friends on the internet
>They tell you the logical choice is to chemically castrate yourself and have your testicles removed because science
>Feel like it's a mistake
I mean I do usually want to look like a girl
But not having a functional dick feels off
Mine still functions?
could be that you're not really trans or just have low self-esteem, isn't HRT making you less dysphoric? if it's not then it's not working as intended which is huge red flag, but if working as intended then you should just stop worrying about that because you're on right track.
bpd not likely, it's an illness to to do with emotions and relationships. self-doubt and low self-esteem may result of course too, but that's not what bpd is about.
Hrt removes dysphoria to the point being a guy sounds okay kinda
then just permaboymode maybe lol? isn't that ultimate solution in that case?
The boobs and non working pp though
just bind boobs lol and your pp should be working if you use it (just jerk off), no cum coming out is normal though and there's no way to get around that except using supplements to increase prostate fluid (look for coomer supplements) and furiously jerking off to prevent prostate shrinkage (including anal masturbation ideally, anal sex works too if you have it more than once a week, this is best to increase prostate size)
It feels worse than a ruined orgasm though when no cum cums out
And binding is really uncomfortable
Never
what? my orgasms are literally same as before and prostate orgasms actually got stronger. nothing is ruined lol.
don't get this obsession with cum, is it a breeeeder thing? cum is mostly nuisance when jerking off and in sex it's more fun to receiver, but as a troony you would likely to be the receiver rather the giver.
Wrong
what?
Wrong
Based
Red pilled
AGP, hrt is nuking your sex drive and therefore your desire to be a woman. This is recorded in the literature, agps going through cycles on and off hrt.
then what you are if your AGP (or sex drive for that matter) is not nuked by HRT?
don't say trutrans, I already know I am, but I still have AGP and nothing makes it go away
You're someone who's sex drive isn't nuked by hrt, could also be a deeply romantic type, where there's an enduring affection for the feminine in the self even without the more conventional male sex drive. AGP isn't a fetish, it's a sexual orientation.
hmn, my sex drive works on estrogen just fine and increasing estrogen may spike it up, but not always. also, no fetishes of mine were lost with loss of T, they're still there and powerful.
Prog does nothing to it, only makes me sleepy.
T makes it just go on overdrive requiring daily masturbation of 1-2 hours (how I was pre-hrt, it was too much) and making my sexuality overtake everything, so nothing else really interest me than sex.
How long on E?
Also, hrt is the best thing for AGP if it's strong enough to cause dysphoria.
Why can't I just be comfortable as a man damn it
take anti-psychotics and see a therapist who isn't a "gender specialty" (AKA profiteer) therapist.
So your saying I'm probably not actually trans and I'm just crazy?
Damn
Trannies are cool though
Alexa
Play
you called?
woah its reese