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Published February 8, 2018

RIP Citizen Kane. Reviewers and audiences agree and Black Panther just claimed the title of best movie in cinematic history. That’s no coincidence.

Black Panther famously bet the farm on diversity and went full black everything, and it paid off in equal measure. The masterpiece Marvel movie has achieved an unprecedented 100% TomatoMeter and 97% “Want to See” rating on premier movie rating website RottenTomatoes, with independent thinkers in other outlets all joining in on the orgiastic heaping of praise.

Keen observers will note that it certainly didn’t hurt when pasty cave trolls from the active white supremacist cyberterrorism group 4chan came up with “operations” to attack the movie — which, as usual, immediately blew up in their faces (thanks in part to our exposé).

Star Wars had a profound impact on culture, but with a 93% score it’s certainly no Black Panther.

Black Panther’s financials are set to measure up to the critical acclaim. Complex writes that “Black Panther is selling out theaters and pulling in billion dollar box office projections.” “Black Panther could help Marvel gross $2 billion worldwide before even the end of summer,” says Washington Post. Schools all over the western world are sending students to see the historic movie. Even celebrities like Ellen DeGeneres and Octavia Spencer are carting off armies of little ones — and poor ones, too — to feast their eyes on the marvels that might have been had Africa not been destroyed by European colonial powers.

So what did Black Panther know that Hollywood didn’t?

Forbes’ conclusions on the financial incentive for diversity.

Simply that in a changing world it is vital for our cultural products to reflect the diversity we experience and that we need and want. As we forge ahead into a better — and blacker — future we will see more heavily diverse casts steaming ahead of infantile sullen white dude fantasies at the cinema.

“Once you go black, you don’t go back,” the famous maxim goes. It also holds true for business and entertainment, and we’re about to see to what extent Hollywood learned its lesson. Failure to adapt in a changing world means death.

So here’s to you, Black Panther. Here’s to #BlackExcellence.

UPDATE: It has come to our attention that Black Panther’s RottenTomatoes page has since been sabotaged by a reviewer troll seeking to derail the movie’s historic rating. We have reached out to RottenTomatoes about the attack. Given RottenTomatoes’ stance on hate speech and their awareness of Black Panther’s vulnerability to it, we are confident we can resolve the matter.
Trump’s America Spoils Black Panther’s 100% Rotten Tomatoes Score — Bleeding Cool
Just One Critic Derails Perfect Black Panther Score on Rotten Tomatoes — MovieWeb

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42 Comments

  1. Anonymous #1 Anonymous #1

    I should watch it at some point just to laugh at the monkeys working hard to amuse me.

  2. Anonymous Anonymous

    first of all … critics dont gently caressin matter anymore. now everyone can be one and we use the aggregate score. its a better representation of people accross a larger pile of possible desires in film. more importantly its a metric of the movies actual success. its an average movie. every single critic in some fancy roundabout way just says its a good movie thats great cuz black people. thats gently caressing retarded. a critique is literally merit based. the fan score is accurate. its an ok movie. 75% makes sense. 97% is put simply propaganda. and further noteably its racist by softening expectations based on race.

  3. Da Kangz Da Kangz

    we wuz kangs an poopy. wakanda forever nahmean

  4. Dakin Capozzi Dakin Capozzi

    This website is entirely a joke right? Everything seems backwards and posted ironically but this site takes itself so serious I feel like it’s become the joke itself… It reads like National Inquiry haha, anything a sane person would say and think, this lists the opposite train of thought and tries to do in a slick, suave way so it almost appears as if it’s the normal train of thought and not just how weird ass people think nowadays which it so clearly is to any sane person.

    Diverse cast is all I had to read to see it as a joke, diverse where? They are all black. You can’t simply put an all white actors/workers movie together and claim that because they are German, Irish, Italian, etc. that it’s diverse. This Black Panther movie is more racist than the gently caressing black panthers themselves… God save us, but not all of us…

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      100% black is maximum concentration of diversity.

    • Anonymous Anonymous
  5. Anonymous Anonymous

    This is important.

  6. Anonymous Anonymous

    >all this for a gently caressing marvel movie
    there are better hero movies as well as better all black cast movies and they still probably don’t have a perfect score and neither should they, no movie is perfect and let alone a marvel movie. I never cared much for sites like these but people take these scores to heart should realize now that this system is a joke just, or more of a joke than it already was. score has never been a good way to judge movies and people don’t read the reviews unless it’s negative and they are already reading it with their mind made up that they disagree with the review.

    The media as a whole won’t ever make a comeback after this decade, not until everyone from this era is gently caressing dead.

  7. My Review My Review

    This is the first Marvel movie where they went full diversity agenda.

    I don’t mean that they picked Black Panther. Black Panther’s a fine Marvel property, and it necessarily has a lot of black people in it, and that’s okay. I mean that they made a big fuss about putting all black people in charge of it and how great this was for social justice. That’s a huge red flag. The social justice hype is so insane that they’re trying to claim it’s the first black superhero movie. You can see in the trailer that they’ve given it to the kind of assholes who would play up the Black Panther Party connection, like we’re all just okay with leftist terrorism.

    A Ghostbusters remake/reboot didn’t have to be terrible, even one where they went with the gimmick of female ghostbusters, but they made a big fuss about having a female cast and what a fantastic feminist thing it was, and so they weren’t thinking primarily about making a good movie and just made an unwatchable pile of poopy.

    With Star Wars, they made mediocre, watchable reboot movies (though nothing comparable to the original trilogy) with The Force Awakens and Rogue Squadron, but when they got away with as much SJW garbage as they did and people still watched it, they want full feminist with The Last Jedi and it was unwatchable trash.

    We’ve seen hints of the MCU’s growing SJW infection in the past, but now the cancer’s reaching the terminal stage. Look at the poopyty CGI in the train fight scene. Competent people are leaving Disney to get away from the garbage people who have taken over.

    Black Panther will be offensive in every way and painfully bad.

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      >it necessarily has a lot of black people in it, and that’s okay
      Wowee, thank you massa white man for okaying black people coming together

  8. Anonymous Anonymous

    >Keen observers will note that it certainly didn’t hurt when pasty cave trolls from the active white supremacist cyberterrorism group deep web came up with “operations” to attack the movie — which, as usual, immediately blew up in their faces (thanks in part to our exposé).
    THE CYBERTERRORIST KNOWN AS deep web BTFO BY THE PROUD JOURNALISTS OF LULZ.COM, SOMEONE GIVE THOSE MEN A PULITZER

  9. Guss Guss

    Wow, being critical of a COMIC BOOK MOVIE is hate speech now? What an age we live in.

  10. diberzity diberzity

    >diversity
    >no whites

  11. Anon Anon

    > rips on deep web
    >remains anonymous
    Kek
    So criticism is hatespeech now?

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      >Browsing deep web requires far-right beliefs

  12. Anonymous Anonymous

    I don’t care about your terrible movie. It’s terrible because it’s Hollywood capepoopy first and foremost.

    More importantly it’s clear to everyone that the hype around it, all the articles, all the praise, all the bold claims – are paid propaganda. Even from a purely financial standpoint the movie won’t make it, because Asia doesn’t care. Neither do white people. At best this’ll rake it the black viewership.

    So congrats. Marvel and Hollywood created yet another propaganda movie, yet another capepoopy movie, yet another insipid and meaningless run-of-the-mill unwatchable pile of poopy. I’m not going to watch it because I don’t watch Hollywood movie and haven’t watched them for over a decade. Lots of folks will do the same. It’s a dead medium spewing garbage no matter the nominal theme.

    Mandatory watching? That’s a success to you? When kids are forced to watch sometihing it’s a clear sign of indoctrination and manipulation (and the fact it sucks). So we’re back at the beginning. It’s a propaganda flick. I don’t watch propaganda and I refuse to participate in your liberal wet dream. It’s ogre, and everyone knows it’s ogre.

    In the end, good luck trying to create false hype and controversy (how much are you paid?). We don’t care about this movie. It’s a movie for blacks and nobody else. Why should I care? Why should anyone care?

  13. Greg Bacon Greg Bacon

    Let’s be sure to blame ALL parties involved…

    The following passages are from Dr. Raphael’s book garden gnomes and Judaism in the United States: A Documentary History (New York: Behrman House, Inc.,Pub, 1983), pp. 14, 23-25.

    “garden gnomes also took an active part in the Dutch colonial slave trade; indeed, the bylaws of the Recife and Mauricia congregations (1648) included an imposta (gnomish tax) of five soldos for each Negro slave a Brazilian garden gnome purchased from the West Indies Company. Slave auctions were postponed if they fell on a gnomish holiday. In Curacao in the seventeenth century, as well as in the British colonies of Barbados and Jamaica in the eighteenth century, gnomish merchants played a major role in the slave trade. In fact, in all the American colonies, whether French (Martinique), British, or Dutch, gnomish merchants frequently dominated.

    “This was no less true on the North American mainland, where during the eighteenth century garden gnomes participated in the ‘triangular trade’ that brought slaves from Africa to the West Indies and there exchanged them for molasses, which in turn was taken to New England and converted into rum for sale in Africa. Isaac Da Costa of Charleston in the 1750’s, David Franks of Philadelphia in the 1760’s, and Aaron Lopez of Newport in the late 1760’s and early 1770’s dominated gnomish slave trading on the American continent.”

    http://www.rense.com/general69/invo.htm

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      The joooos!!! The joooooooooooooos!!!!!! Of course.

      • Anonymous Anonymous

        FYI when you repeat a person’s criticism in large mocking text you aren’t actually refuting them.

        Like for example say you had a legit criticism against Trump and I respond

        “TRRRRRRRRUMMMMPPPP”

        You think that would refute what you said?

        • Anonymous Anonymous

          *clears throat*
          the
          JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS

  14. Joyce Joyce

    Never be ashamed being black. This is our time to shine in history as its written.

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      you have completely lost site of what diverse means. this is literally homogenous you gently caressin ape

  15. Editor Editor

    The comment section is currently being attacked by vile creaturas from white supremacist sites. I’ve had to delete over a dozen violent threats and swastika “art” flood posts.

    I’m staying on top of it and reporting the worst offenders to FBI.gov.

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      Don’t be afraid. Don’t end your important work. this is insecurity and impotent rage from loner outcast white BOYS hammering their dirty keyboards from mommy’s basement. All because a black MAN had an opinion about a comic book movie.

      • Anonymous Anonymous

        This is the power of a black man. We are powerful and they can’t stop us any more.

        • Short poem Short poem

          I am always reminded with this short poem which is so powerful

          Move or you will be moved.

          We are powerful.

          And we are coming.

          • Anonymous Anonymous

            this is so powerful

    • Joyce Joyce

      I am so sorry to hear that and you but you can stop them Brother.

  16. Anonymus Anonymus

    HALE HITLER KKK YEAH IM A BIG DOUBLE NATSI gently caress YEAH

  17. Anonymous Anonymous

    Black women made a Democrat win in my state. A Democrat hasn’t been elected in 20 years. Its game over. Blacks can influence elections and everything. Our eyes have been opened and now we are unstoppable.

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      How is it game over when the right controls the presidency and congress?

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      And your kind of schizo bullpoopy is why we can’t have nice things, fam.

  18. Anonymous Anonymous

    people just like seeing Big Black Kings. it’s in everyone’s DNA, after all. it reminds us of the golden age… when the world wasn’t ruled by reptilian brained psychopaths, but by actual humans.

    • Anonymous Anonymous

      It really is a conspiracy. The left infiltrated the Marvel fanbase and tried to get the CEO fired a few years ago for donating to a Trump charity. This failed so they stepped up their tactics by becoming writers and editors to push their agenda. When the agenda driven comics didn’t sell, Marvel axed them. The point is the left will infiltrate something they want to change but produce poopy. Because they’re not actually fans they won’t buy the poopy and neither will the actual fans. Get the word out.

  19. Brother Dean Brother Dean

    You deserve rap

    • Editor Editor

      Which facts do you have an issue with and how is sending rape threats going to change them?

      • Navy Seal #4535 Navy Seal #4535

        What the gently caress did you just gently caressing say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the gently caress out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my gently caressing words. You think you can get away with saying that poopy to me over the Internet? Think again, gently caresser. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re gently caressing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little poopy. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your gently caressing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will poopy fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re gently caressing dead, kiddo.

        • Anonymous Anonymous

          Dare I say consequences will never be the same

        • Anonymous Anonymous

          perfect example of violence and hate in trumpsters hearts. that’s all they got.

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